Spouse talks too much- driving me crazy.
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Anonymous
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He’s always been conversational and has always talked more than me. I was always a good audience and have been the ying to his yang but after 20 years, his over emphasis pontifications is now annoying me to the max. I have to hold myself back from shutting him off each conversation.
Once DH changed to working at home, plus aging (now 60), has off shooted this “over expansion of expression” ,along with being more sensitive. I, on the other hand, have become more closed down. Anyone ekse experiencing this? I just keep reminding myself that I love him and look forward to polite excuses to shut him up. Any suggestions on how to soften this constant interaction? I don’t know why I get angry, I guess because I’m 60! Anyone with a spouse like this? |
Anonymous
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You put in earplugs and are listening to something else. Even if you're not.
You're out of the house more. You arrange less togetherness. |
Anonymous
| You take him to the doctor. Could be a sign of vascular dementia or at least five other conditions |
Anonymous
| Is he manic? |
Anonymous
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This happens when both spouses are at home everyday.
Please discuss this with your husband before it results in an outburst. You need time apart. Can you volunteer for a few days to get some separation ? Good luck. Not your fault; not his fault; just the way things are. |
Anonymous
| Someone needs to work outside the house, at least part time. |
Anonymous
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I actually ask if we can have quiet time.
That lasts about 10 minutes before the verbal diarrhea starts again. I started simply going to a different room when I hear him coming. One day when I was tired and reading in bed he cornered me and got annoyed that I asked if we could talk later. He said that usually women want a man who talks more and he’s an emotionally available husband getting shut down. Sure, okay. This is why people get divorced. I can’t imagine going through retirement like this. |
Anonymous
| Can you muster some listening energy at certain times of the day for him? I try to agree on what good times to talk are. Morning coffee plus when you’re walking the dog. Try to find some time each day when you can listen undistracted. Then tell him you’re feeling like you need more quiet, reflective time but want to try really listening at xx and yy times. |
Anonymous
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Sounds like that husband needs a job outside of the home w more in person interaction
You’re his wife. Suggest it. |
Anonymous
| This sounds excruciating. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you have to be his captive audience. Also, he needs hobbies and friends. Older man yapping is the worst. |
Anonymous
I sense she’s been doing that and he wants her undivided attention much more than that. So annoying and entitled. She’s been catering to him for decades. Let her be! |
Anonymous
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Watch Shrinking together. When Crista Miller (Liz) essentially tells Ted McGinley (Derek), that she's had the house for 20 years while he's been doing the grind of work, and now the roles are reversed, and perhaps it's her turn to get out of the house while he has the house.
Then realize how close to home this hits, and get out of the house more. |
Anonymous
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Wear earbuds and listen to music.
Do your activities. Get out of the house more. Once I had to tell my boyfriend no talking to the uber driver for the 2 hour uber ride home from the airport after a late flight. I knew it would drive me crazy. |
Anonymous
| I feel for you - only in my case it's the other way around. I don't want to hear for the hundredth time how good you are at work than anyone else there and how you'd be a better boss than your boss (among other things). |
Anonymous
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Yes get some headphones that can be a visual signal that you are doing something else. Even if that something else is listening to nothing. I'd also have some other signals, like closing an office door or something like that.
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