Walkaway wife

[Anonymous]

https://www.the-independent.com/life-style/love-sex/marriage/women-midlife-divorce-b2868372.html?fbclid=IwdGRjcAORqNhleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBzcnRjBmFwcF9pZAo2NjI4NTY4Mzc5AAEeWZ4oK9kN3ATOhDK16vojyGW8g2wBxYlLzabisFEd0xXrD1xWqZVbAcXkCyw_aem_MjlnIfUjzD6Ybt_RQJ7ldQ#87ja7vo7ebceg30cv14mp2zq5oqdxy7s

This article sums up a lot of what is discussed on dcum. I could totally take or leave my marriage, depends on the day. Anyone else?

[Anonymous]

Yes, I totally relate. I'm sticking things out for the kids. I've accepted some of his behavior for the sake of the kids, but I have no intention of remaining married once they leave the nest. We are too different, and it is becoming more apparent as we get older. I want to travel and seek out new experiences. He likes repetition and would be happy to spend his remaining days at the country club. We also have very different priorities and values around money, and I think once he's retired and on a fixed income, he's going to spend himself into the poor house, and I don't want to be around for it.

[Anonymous]

I have been divorced for a year. My mental health has been incredibly good. I didn't realize how stressful it was being married to my ex.

Unfortunately we men tend to be silent when it comes to our unhappiness. Women to their credit completely dominate the grievance space.

There are a lot unhappy men. They just stay quiet. They are quietly walkway husbands...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been divorced for a year. My mental health has been incredibly good. I didn't realize how stressful it was being married to my ex.

Unfortunately we men tend to be silent when it comes to our unhappiness. Women to their credit completely dominate the grievance space.

There are a lot unhappy men. They just stay quiet. They are quietly walkway husbands...

Usually those guys just have affairs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been divorced for a year. My mental health has been incredibly good. I didn't realize how stressful it was being married to my ex.

Unfortunately we men tend to be silent when it comes to our unhappiness. Women to their credit completely dominate the grievance space.

There are a lot unhappy men. They just stay quiet. They are quietly walkway husbands...

Why didn’t you ever try to fix your marriage or make it better? You just never said anything and then left?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been divorced for a year. My mental health has been incredibly good. I didn't realize how stressful it was being married to my ex.

Unfortunately we men tend to be silent when it comes to our unhappiness. Women to their credit completely dominate the grievance space.

There are a lot unhappy men. They just stay quiet. They are quietly walkway husbands...

Why didn’t you ever try to fix your marriage or make it better? You just never said anything and then left?

I'm a woman and a DP but what in the world in that response made you believe he didn't try? Why do posters like you need to make stuff up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been divorced for a year. My mental health has been incredibly good. I didn't realize how stressful it was being married to my ex.

Unfortunately we men tend to be silent when it comes to our unhappiness. Women to their credit completely dominate the grievance space.

There are a lot unhappy men. They just stay quiet. They are quietly walkway husbands...

Why didn’t you ever try to fix your marriage or make it better? You just never said anything and then left?

PP here. I (we).tried for years. What lead to the dissolution of the marriage was that she refused to take drugs prescribed to her to treat her ADHD. She always had ADHD but was never medicated for it. And not being under any drugs, she became impossible to live with. We spent thousands upon thousands on therapy. Sex eventually became non existent. Our son complained that she was yelling at him for no reasons and randomly. It became exhausting just to be around her.

[Anonymous]

I’m 100% sure my husband will be so completely unhealthy in 10-15 years that I will need to leave for my own sanity and to not end up being his 24/7 caretaker. He is actually younger than me but in terrible health simply because he doesn’t take care of himself at all.

So my plan is to see where things are when my youngest goes off to college. And I will choose my path accordingly. We get along fine-as others stated in the article. And I would never rip my kids’ life apart since there is nothing “wrong” with our marriage. But yeah I want more. I want to live. He doesn’t seem to care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been divorced for a year. My mental health has been incredibly good. I didn't realize how stressful it was being married to my ex.

Unfortunately we men tend to be silent when it comes to our unhappiness. Women to their credit completely dominate the grievance space.

There are a lot unhappy men. They just stay quiet. They are quietly walkway husbands...

Why didn’t you ever try to fix your marriage or make it better? You just never said anything and then left?

I'm a woman and a DP but what in the world in that response made you believe he didn't try? Why do posters like you need to make stuff up?

I said that because he said he was silent about his grievances.
It sounds like he wasn’t though. I don’t know why he said that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 100% sure my husband will be so completely unhealthy in 10-15 years that I will need to leave for my own sanity and to not end up being his 24/7 caretaker. He is actually younger than me but in terrible health simply because he doesn’t take care of himself at all.

So my plan is to see where things are when my youngest goes off to college. And I will choose my path accordingly. We get along fine-as others stated in the article. And I would never rip my kids’ life apart since there is nothing “wrong” with our marriage. But yeah I want more. I want to live. He doesn’t seem to care.

So you will dump him when you no longer have any use of him. In other words, you can't dump him now because strategically it's a bad move right now.

Cool.

Be careful. S**t can happen to you anytime while you are believing that someone him the unhealthy one is destined for a life of misery you want no parr off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 100% sure my husband will be so completely unhealthy in 10-15 years that I will need to leave for my own sanity and to not end up being his 24/7 caretaker. He is actually younger than me but in terrible health simply because he doesn’t take care of himself at all.

So my plan is to see where things are when my youngest goes off to college. And I will choose my path accordingly. We get along fine-as others stated in the article. And I would never rip my kids’ life apart since there is nothing “wrong” with our marriage. But yeah I want more. I want to live. He doesn’t seem to care.

So you will dump him when you no longer have any use of him. In other words, you can't dump him now because strategically it's a bad move right now.

Cool.

Be careful. S**t can happen to you anytime while you are believing that someone him the unhealthy one is destined for a life of misery you want no parr off.

Wow, really hitting a nerve with you huh? Getting worried about your own marriage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been divorced for a year. My mental health has been incredibly good. I didn't realize how stressful it was being married to my ex.

Unfortunately we men tend to be silent when it comes to our unhappiness. Women to their credit completely dominate the grievance space.

There are a lot unhappy men. They just stay quiet. They are quietly walkway husbands...

Why didn’t you ever try to fix your marriage or make it better? You just never said anything and then left?

PP here. I (we).tried for years. What lead to the dissolution of the marriage was that she refused to take drugs prescribed to her to treat her ADHD. She always had ADHD but was never medicated for it. And not being under any drugs, she became impossible to live with. We spent thousands upon thousands on therapy. Sex eventually became non existent. Our son complained that she was yelling at him for no reasons and randomly. It became exhausting just to be around her.

That doesn’t sound like you were silent about your unhappiness . I’m glad that things are going well for you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m 100% sure my husband will be so completely unhealthy in 10-15 years that I will need to leave for my own sanity and to not end up being his 24/7 caretaker. He is actually younger than me but in terrible health simply because he doesn’t take care of himself at all.

So my plan is to see where things are when my youngest goes off to college. And I will choose my path accordingly. We get along fine-as others stated in the article. And I would never rip my kids’ life apart since there is nothing “wrong” with our marriage. But yeah I want more. I want to live. He doesn’t seem to care.

So you will dump him when you no longer have any use of him. In other words, you can't dump him now because strategically it's a bad move right now.

Cool.

Be careful. S**t can happen to you anytime while you are believing that someone him the unhealthy one is destined for a life of misery you want no parr off.

sounds like you may be the unhealthy one on your relationship and are taking out your feelings about it with my comment.

It’s a bad move right now because I have fairly young children, Who I love and are putting them above me.

[Anonymous]

I relate to some of it, but not all. We have problems in our marriage. DH won’t talk about them. I’ve thought about divorce.
I actually think that things will get better between us once the kids leave though. A lot of our issues really are about housework and childcare. Once we don’t have those responsibilities anymore, I think we will be pretty compatible again.

[Anonymous]

The photos they chose to illustrate that story are so weird and kind of undermining their thesis. They are defining a "walkaway wife" as a woman who quietly suffers for years with a disinterested or selfish husband, and then one day files for divorce because she's had enough. Yet the photos include:

- A still from the 2025 television show The Four Seasons. The photo is of a character, Anne, who is indeed a long suffering wife to a somewhat self-involved husband. However, not only does she not divorce him, but it is revealed in the first episode that he is planning to divorce him even as she is planning a surprise vow renewal as an anniversary gift to him. She's like the opposite of a walkaway wife.

- A photo of Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban. Yes Nicole filed for divorce from Urban, but it's not clear that she was either long suffering or that she was silent. Urban appears to now be in a relationship with a MUCH younger musician who is touring with him, which has raised rumors that he has been cheating on Kidman. It doesn't seem like the "walkaway wife" is normally someone leaving due to infidelity. Nicole could be a walkaway wife but it's not clear she is. They may be thinking of her hear because it seems like she was a walkaway wife from her marriage to Tom Cruise, which ended with there literally walking away in joy and relief in a very famous paparazzi photo taken outside the office where she signed her divorce papers. But that was Cruise, not Urban.

- A still from the TV series The Split, about a family of divorce lawyers and their personal lives. The photo is of the character Hannah, who does go through a divorce on the show. But it would be very inaccurate to call her a "walkaway wife" -- both people in her marriage are unhappy and dissatisfied, they both betray their spouse at various points in the relationship, and the divorce is not a blindside to Nathan.

I feel like these photos kind of illustrate the fact that the "walkaway wife" is a silly trope some writers is trying to make happen, but actually marital unhappiness at midlife, and divorce, are generally a bit more nuanced that a catchphrase.