General question about nanny sharing

[Anonymous]

I know a lot of the moms here on the expectant boards have kids already, so I'm wondering if anyone has insights on setting up a nanny share? I've heard that (unlike daycare!) you can't really do it too far in advance. I'm just curious what makes sense to plan for as far as timing for finding another family & also a nanny. I'm due in mid-Aug, & will probably go back to work sometime in mid-Nov or early Dec. Thanks for any advice!

[Anonymous]

Where do you live? We are also looking to do a nanny share probably beginning late Nov or early December. We live in North Bethesda.

[Anonymous]

OP here: I'm in Del Ray/Old Town area

[Anonymous]

If you can afford it skip the share. Its such a headache dealing with the other parents, and often the nanny ends up dissatisfied with the 4 boss situation.

[Anonymous]

We really liked doing a share - and it is MUCH more affordable-
If you've got more specific questions, happy to answer -

[Anonymous]

I live in Glen Echo and am looking to do a nanny share beginning in mid-January.

[Anonymous]

To answer your question, you could start looking for a share family sooner rather than later, but you won't be able to find a nanny until 4 to 6 weeks before. We did a share and were very happy with the arrangement. Some things to consider:

- location, location, location. Someone suggested to us that this was the number one priority when setting one up, and I have to agree. The other family lived less than 2 blocks away.
- Where. While I initially thought us hosting full time would be a bonus in terms of our time, I had underestimated the cost of having two toddlers in our house full time. Toys lost, couch drawn on, and just the cleaning side of it all.
- Relationship between families. We got on very well with the other family and are still friends, however they did have different expectations in terms of pay, benefits and communication with the nanny. I became the full time go between and it got old very fast. Before you begin interviewing nannies make sure you agree the terms and how high you would go for the right candidate.
- The nanny. I think for a successful share you do really need a super flexible nanny. We were incredibly lucky to have one who was willing to roll with the punches and changes that are inevitable with two kids and four parents. But this is not the job for every nanny. You certainly need a high energy person, but also one who is not rigid in terms of schedule, etc.

I'm sure I've left some things out, but these are the ones I remember.

Good Luck!

[Anonymous]

We started in a nanny share - we stayed in that share for about 9 months. The other mom decided to be a full time mom so we kept our nanny and looked for another family.

We LOVED the second family we shared with - again for about 9 months. That mom decided to become full time mom when she discovered she was pregnant. Again, we kept our nanny and looked for another family.

The third family was terrible. After about 6 months, our nanny and I agreed it was time to confront the other family with our issues. After speaking with the other family, our nanny and I decided that it was in our best interest to terminate the arrangement.

By that time, I discovered I was pregnant. We decided to not look for another family so we increased our nanny's hours and wage.

Personnally, I really think our daughter benefited from the nanny share. She got used to sharing time and toys with another child. In the first arrangement, she was the younger child. In the second arrangement, she was the same age as the other child. In the third arrangement, she was the older child.