Dear Wife Week 5

[Anonymous]

Thanks for taking care of the kids the past two weekends while I was out of town. Please bring the video camera to the kid’s games so I can watch them when I get back from my guys weekends away, it makes it a lot easier on me when the kids are crying that I missed another game. You need to keep that in mind. I will be around Sunday but after 1:00 count me out. Can you pick up some fresh deli meat when you go get coffee and bagels?

I have a work dinner next Thursday and will be home very late, I might stay downtown so don't wait up for me. My assistant gave me your message about Thanksgiving at your folk’s house and that is fine, I will have to fly in Thursday morning; I can't deal with the crowds at the airport and all those people who have no idea how to travel. Also, please make sure your mom knows I plan on watching the games on TV and if she can plan dinner for in between them or during halftime. I will probably come back that night or very early Friday to go to the Caps game that night.

Dinner on Saturday needs to be early because I am going out to watch some games with some friends.

[Anonymous]

Dear husband,

F off

Love,

Dear Wife

[Anonymous]

Dear H,

This is exactly why I never give you blowjobs anymore, and I never will. Please print this off and tape it to the nightstand on your side of the bed.

Best,

your wife who's not actually "frigid" but just doesn't like you anymore and is not incentivized to make you happy.

[Anonymous]

Dear Patient in Ward 5,

I spoke with your assigned psychiatrist and he feels it is unhealthy for you to continue writing as you did when you were married. He believes you need to work harder and focus on the reality that you are now divorced and your ex moved far away many years ago because of your selfish, immature and irresponsible ways. While we cannot promise anything, if you work harder at relinquishing beliefs held in your former prior including self centered grandiose delusions, you might be able to earn extra points for cafeteria privileges; I understand that chocolate pudding is one of your favorites.


Signed,

Ward 5 Staff Member

[Anonymous]

*former life* (not *former prior*)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear Patient in Ward 5,

I spoke with your assigned psychiatrist and he feels it is unhealthy for you to continue writing as you did when you were married. He believes you need to work harder and focus on the reality that you are now divorced and your ex moved far away many years ago because of your selfish, immature and irresponsible ways. While we cannot promise anything, if you work harder at relinquishing beliefs held in your former prior including self centered grandiose delusions, you might be able to earn extra points for cafeteria privileges; I understand that chocolate pudding is one of your favorites.


Signed,

Ward 5 Staff Member

LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear Patient in Ward 5,

I spoke with your assigned psychiatrist and he feels it is unhealthy for you to continue writing as you did when you were married. He believes you need to work harder and focus on the reality that you are now divorced and your ex moved far away many years ago because of your selfish, immature and irresponsible ways. While we cannot promise anything, if you work harder at relinquishing beliefs held in your former prior including self centered grandiose delusions, you might be able to earn extra points for cafeteria privileges; I understand that chocolate pudding is one of your favorites.


Signed,

Ward 5 Staff Member

Lol!

[Anonymous]

These posts are so mysterious they're pointless.