help me navigate this

[Anonymous]

I have a niece, young adult, profoundly autistic. Ialso have a daughter, age 8, audhd. My niece's vocal stimming triggers my child. The family is staying with me for 2 weeks due to an emergency situation.

My brother (parent of niece) adn the family are not very accepting of my child's issues because their daughter is profoundly autistic. I get that my kid's needs aren't as severe, but I also feel like it's overwhelming for her to have an entire family staying in her space unexpectedly.

Do I just make a schedule so they are not in the same space?

[Anonymous]

Yes, you need to provide your daughter with a break.

But what it is that you want your family members to do?

[Anonymous]

Just keep them separated.

[Anonymous]

Noise cancelling headphones for your daughter when they need to be together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Noise cancelling headphones for your daughter when they need to be together.

+1

[Anonymous]

That is a lot. Two weeks is a long time for anyone to stay at one's home. I would reconsider hosting, esp., as they are not considerate of your DD's situation. Can any other family member do this? Have they considered an Air BNB or their own friends, other siblings, parents. Honestly, I am not sure I would have put their needs before my own audhd DS' needs. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

How many people are visiting, OP?
Do you have financial resources to throw money at the problem and get them a rental or Oakwood type apartment?

[Anonymous]

It's your home, your boundaries. Advocate for your own child and discuss with them before to come up with some options. If they are inflexible and call you insensitive to their child's needs while ignoring your child's needs then I would not host for so long or perhaps they should not be in your home. They are the guests. Sure get your daughter noise canceling headphones. Will both girls be going to school during the day or is this over a break? What is the family emergency? Can they afford a short-term rental? Is this true need or just being thrifty?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Noise cancelling headphones for your daughter when they need to be together.

+1

This. It's a step to teach your daughter how to accommodate her own needs around others. Noise cancelling headphones may be pretty obtrusive, so it's reasonable for you to ask your daughter to tolerate short periods without the headphones (family dinner? or breakfast?). If you have noise cancelling AirPods, they are less noticeable and so the social signal - "I can't stand your noise" - is less obvious, and there is a setting which minimizes background noise but still lets speech through. Experiment.

[Anonymous]

this is the time to put your kid first. Do what your kids needs- not what your brother's family needs.

[Anonymous]

Hope that is during school weeks which your daughter will be in school Monday to Friday for most of the days. I am not sure if your brother's family and niece need you to drive them somewhere or go to somewhere during that 2 weeks. If not, just do bare minimum and leave them feel comfortable at your home, and you take care of your daughter and take her out to play. My house is a mess and small, we can never host anyone. They are welcome to check out hotel or motel if they come visit.