Applying Out and Donations

[Anonymous]

Strongly considering applying out this year. In the past, we have been regular donors, but we wouldn't be applying out if we were super happy. Ok to stop donating, or better to continue until after applications are in to maintain involvement?

[Anonymous]

No reason to. Your donations have zero impact on anything related to applying out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No reason to. Your donations have zero impact on anything related to applying out.

This, 100%

[Anonymous]

Don’t waste your money. Save it for the new school.

[Anonymous]

We have been very clear in our reasons for not donating. I don’t see why it should be kept secret.

[Anonymous]

I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

Sounds like the mafia

[Anonymous]

Donations are always optional, and it’s 100% fine to stop giving when you are no longer happy with the school. Stopping donations will have zero effect on applying out - obviously you’re unhappy in some way, or you wouldn’t be making a change!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

Schools do talk, and the independent school community is surprising small. But that doesn’t mean OP has to donate this year. They just need to keep things civil and not go around badmouthing the school or creating drama. Keep everything positive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

Sounds like the mafia

Or being a good community member. Put another - completely different - way. Tuition doesn’t cover the cost for your child to attend. Even if you want to move - your child is still attending now so it makes sense to donate this year too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

Sounds like the mafia

Or being a good community member. Put another - completely different - way. Tuition doesn’t cover the cost for your child to attend. Even if you want to move - your child is still attending now so it makes sense to donate this year too.

Spoken like a class rep or school development officer.

OP, it will have zero impact on teacher recommendations or other things that you need to apply out. For one thing, they will be begging/ asking for money well into next year, up until their fiscal year ends in June. If it makes you feel better, just "postpone" your giving decision until, say, May or June of next year. Well after you are situated in a new school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

Sounds like the mafia

Or being a good community member. Put another - completely different - way. Tuition doesn’t cover the cost for your child to attend. Even if you want to move - your child is still attending now so it makes sense to donate this year too.

Spoken like a class rep or school development officer.

OP, it will have zero impact on teacher recommendations or other things that you need to apply out. For one thing, they will be begging/ asking for money well into next year, up until their fiscal year ends in June. If it makes you feel better, just "postpone" your giving decision until, say, May or June of next year. Well after you are situated in a new school.

This. Teachers really don’t know who donates anyway, but even if they did, there’s all year to do so, they aren’t going to assume anything in October.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have been very clear in our reasons for not donating. I don’t see why it should be kept secret.

Same

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

Sounds like the mafia

Or being a good community member. Put another - completely different - way. Tuition doesn’t cover the cost for your child to attend. Even if you want to move - your child is still attending now so it makes sense to donate this year too.

Spoken like a class rep or school development officer.

OP, it will have zero impact on teacher recommendations or other things that you need to apply out. For one thing, they will be begging/ asking for money well into next year, up until their fiscal year ends in June. If it makes you feel better, just "postpone" your giving decision until, say, May or June of next year. Well after you are situated in a new school.

Yes - I’m a former class rep but have before and after doing so. I have also been part of private school communities for almost 20 years and have seen many people apply out and seen successes and failures. These include applying out in terminal years where everyone is applying out, in earlier years with intention of moving at a transition grade like MS/HS, or in earlier years due to unhappiness or poor fit.

Again - don’t be naive and think that all that matters is your essays, testing, & teacher recs. AO’s 100% care about giving and they care about bringing nice families into their community.

Maybe consider a third view - if you found yourself in March with no good options or acceptance only at your backup option - would you be willing to pay the amount of your typical donation to change that outcome?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd keep donating - the current school is the one giving you recommendations. Don't be naive and think that only teachers' recommendations matter. Schools talk to one another. It's always best to be above the fray until the end. Give them only reason to say good things about your child and your family. That's my view. I've seen unhappy families try to leave and make a big statement about x, y, or z and to stop giving. It doesn't usually end great. The ones that leave with grace and keep being part of the community and go out at the end of the year as a surprise to most families - those are that ones that go well.

Sounds like the mafia

Or being a good community member. Put another - completely different - way. Tuition doesn’t cover the cost for your child to attend. Even if you want to move - your child is still attending now so it makes sense to donate this year too.

Spoken like a class rep or school development officer.

OP, it will have zero impact on teacher recommendations or other things that you need to apply out. For one thing, they will be begging/ asking for money well into next year, up until their fiscal year ends in June. If it makes you feel better, just "postpone" your giving decision until, say, May or June of next year. Well after you are situated in a new school.

Yes - I’m a former class rep but have always donated (before and after doing being a rep). I have also been part of private school communities for almost 20 years and have seen many people apply out and seen successes and failures. These include applying out in terminal years where everyone is applying out, in earlier years with intention of moving at a transition grade like MS/HS, or in earlier years due to unhappiness or poor fit.

Again - don’t be naive and think that all that matters is your essays, testing, & teacher recs. AO’s 100% care about giving and they care about bringing nice families into their community.

Maybe consider a third view - if you found yourself in March with no good options or acceptance only at your backup option - would you be willing to pay the amount of your typical donation to change that outcome?

correction above