Teachers say 3rd grader working too slowly

[Anonymous]

My kid just started 3rd grade. They are academically advanced by the measures that exist at this age - very high (95+) percentiles on any assessment test they've taken at school, advanced academic placement, etc. They also are very methodical, love to take their time, and sometimes in their own world.

They have 2 teachers for 3rd grade (each teaches half the day). Both the teachers have sent home work with "low grades" (they use a check, check plus, check minus system) because my kid is not finishing the work in class. It doesn't seem to be a comprehension issue and when I ask DC why they did not finish, they say "I don't know" or "I was working on it" or something else. It's possible DC is not super focused; it is also possible they are just taking their time. I asked one of the teachers for a quick chat to see what's going on, but their response was "the year is just getting started, we are just setting routines" and essentially declined to talk to me for now.

I am admittedly a little annoyed at the whole "grading" system (I have an issue with applying a grade to a social-emotional worksheet, for example) and generally feel bad my kid isn't loving getting "bad grades" for not finishing things, especially this early in the year (I don't want them to get discouraged or check out). On the other hand, I appreciate sometimes in life you have to finish the assignment and maybe this is appropriate at this age to try to get the kids focused on getting to the finish line in the time allotted. Basically, I'm just looking for reactions to this - does this seem normal/appropriate and is there anything else I should do to try to support my kid at this point in the year or let it play out a little longer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid just started 3rd grade. They are academically advanced by the measures that exist at this age - very high (95+) percentiles on any assessment test they've taken at school, advanced academic placement, etc. They also are very methodical, love to take their time, and sometimes in their own world.

They have 2 teachers for 3rd grade (each teaches half the day). Both the teachers have sent home work with "low grades" (they use a check, check plus, check minus system) because my kid is not finishing the work in class. It doesn't seem to be a comprehension issue and when I ask DC why they did not finish, they say "I don't know" or "I was working on it" or something else. It's possible DC is not super focused; it is also possible they are just taking their time. I asked one of the teachers for a quick chat to see what's going on, but their response was "the year is just getting started, we are just setting routines" and essentially declined to talk to me for now.

I am admittedly a little annoyed at the whole "grading" system (I have an issue with applying a grade to a social-emotional worksheet, for example) and generally feel bad my kid isn't loving getting "bad grades" for not finishing things, especially this early in the year (I don't want them to get discouraged or check out). On the other hand, I appreciate sometimes in life you have to finish the assignment and maybe this is appropriate at this age to try to get the kids focused on getting to the finish line in the time allotted. Basically, I'm just looking for reactions to this - does this seem normal/appropriate and is there anything else I should do to try to support my kid at this point in the year or let it play out a little longer?

For the social emotional worksheets, the check system is just an indication of effort. You might consider that your student has attention issues, which could become more of a struggle in future years. If he is academically advanced, there’s no academic reason why he is taking so much time on these pages - so that leaves an issue with focus or defiance.

[Anonymous]

Maybe wait until the parent teacher conference to get more details. If it is still an issue then you could request a Child Find meeting to see if there could be a learning disability impacting this. How does the child do socially?

[Anonymous]

Disagree. I would continue to push to get a conversation now. That is disappointing you are getting blown off. I would mention this as a new pattern with real, tangible consequences of not addressing it such as the beginning of a dislike of school which you want to head off before it gets worse. I would escalate if necessary. Ask to connect briefly at many times to try to find something convenient for them. I would get to the root of this now.

[Anonymous]

Did her 2nd grade teacher say anything? Have you noticed that she works too slowly at home? I am not one to diagnose but it could be ADHD.

[Anonymous]

One of my kids has inattentive ADHD and very low processing speed. The two sometimes occur together. If this is a persistent problem, you will want to have your kid evaluated by a psychologist, to measure processing speed, see if there's ADHD or learning disabilities, etc.

[Anonymous]

We did not find out DC has dyslexia and slow processing speed until high school but looking back, this was an early sign. He is very smart and read but much slower than others. The sooner you find any issues, the more time you have to address them.

[Anonymous]

OP here, thank you for these thoughtful replies. Our child can be very focused and complete work very quickly (and accurately) when they are engaged in it. Where I am able to observe them, it seems they are much slower/distracted when bored. Does this track with some of the suggestions around ADHD or processing? (I don't think it is the latter but I am not super familiar with the nuances of the former).

I appreciate the validation for follow up - I was surprised that the teacher declined a conversation. (I made it clear it it would be brief!)

[Anonymous]

Oh and OP again -- just to add, this has not been a problem in past years. It seems new this year, and I'm not sure if there are just increased demands/expectations or what is going on...

[Anonymous]

Get the 504/IEP to protect the grades. Play the system you are stuck in, and don't have an ego about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thank you for these thoughtful replies. Our child can be very focused and complete work very quickly (and accurately) when they are engaged in it. Where I am able to observe them, it seems they are much slower/distracted when bored. Does this track with some of the suggestions around ADHD or processing? (I don't think it is the latter but I am not super familiar with the nuances of the former).

I appreciate the validation for follow up - I was surprised that the teacher declined a conversation. (I made it clear it it would be brief!)

I don't think the teacher should have declined a convo (our child's teachers made it clear they welcome parents checking in briefly at dismissal). That being said, they may simply feel it is too early to say anything definitive. If they are starting to suspect a learning issue, they will need to collect data to justify recommending an evaluation. I agree with the PP that it is better to address these issues sooner rather than later, but from the school's perspective IME they aren't going to do much after a couple of weeks of school and will need more time to collect data. That being said, you could look into a private evaluation.

Adding that my kid is a bit like this and was diagnosed with autism, and now has a 504 plan that gives extra time. I don't say this because I think your kid is autistic (I have no idea, your kid may be neurotypical for all I know) but just be aware not to be focused on this being any specific thing as these behaviors/symptoms could mean different things. And not to be afraid of a diagnosis of any kind - having accurate information about how your kid's brain works can be immensely helpful and empowering.

I will also say that the school processes for identifying learning disabilities/special needs are not always awesome. I do know people who have been able to get services this way and they have been very helpful. But in our case with a less severe presentation, we had to get a private evaluation (which thankfully our insurance reimbursed for most of the cost but ymmv), and we definitely found it to be worth it. So if the school says don't worry your kid is fine, but you are still concerned after a few months, you might want to consider a private eval.

[Anonymous]

OP -- this might be inattentive ADHD -- especially if processing speed is low.

[Anonymous]

I was like this and have manageable ADHD. Don't take meds and never have, but I definitely had to teach myself to stay focused and implement systems to make sure work got done.

[Anonymous]

When you do speak to the teacher, you might ask if the students are given a deadline for completing class work, like “You need to finish this by 10:15,” so that your child understands that it needs to be done right away. Many students stay focused more easily with a visual timer that you can set for a certain amount of time and the child can see the red block disappearing as time elapses.
It’s also possible that the classroom is noisy or distracting in some way. Perhaps your child’s seat is placed so that can see another child working on a computer screen, or something like that. After you meet with the teacher, you can ask that the guidance counselor do an observation to see what information might be gleaned and how your child’s seat compares with classmates.

You can also help your child’s set a goal of completing work on time, so long as the time is clearly outlined by the teacher, and also discuss with your child’s set what happens in class during work time. You can say that you are trying to remember what it was like at that age, and say something like you once sat next to a kid who always tapped their pencil and you found it hard to focus, or something like that. Ask specific questions about the whole class experience of both your kid and the teacher.

[Anonymous]

Could be a reading issue too.