Are foreign women more blunt with their standards?

[Anonymous]

I'm dating a woman from Latin America and we were talking about what we value in a partner. I asked her if she would be with me if I made less money than her, she said no.

She said in her culture it's completely normal to expect this in a man and it's not seen as "gold digging" behavior to admit this out loud. While in the US women are a bit more embarrassed to admit they prefer a man who earns more.

Would you say this is true?

[Anonymous]

Yes

[Anonymous]

What a weird question. Of course traditional women know that men should be primarily responsible to bring home the bacon, and women are responsible for the home and children.

Naturally, you help each other.

[Anonymous]

NO. Please don't mistake cultural differences with poor manners. She has just demonstrated to you that she is not of the top drawer in her country. Wealthy and educated people the world over have manners, OP. She is a lower-class, crass person.

It's true that most countries in the world have more patriarchal societies than America and western Europe. This makes women expect a more traditional marriage, with men being providers, and women being burdened with feminine standards of beauty and behavior that might seem a little too traditional in the US.

But bluntly telling you that she wouldn't date you if you made less is never OK. It's extremely rude. Please don't marry her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NO. Please don't mistake cultural differences with poor manners. She has just demonstrated to you that she is not of the top drawer in her country. Wealthy and educated people the world over have manners, OP. She is a lower-class, crass person.

It's true that most countries in the world have more patriarchal societies than America and western Europe. This makes women expect a more traditional marriage, with men being providers, and women being burdened with feminine standards of beauty and behavior that might seem a little too traditional in the US.

But bluntly telling you that she wouldn't date you if you made less is never OK. It's extremely rude. Please don't marry her.

Me again. My family is very international and I have lived on several different continents. My cousins are from Latin America. They are from an educated, well-off milieu and have impeccable manners. My other cousins are Japanese and likewise, would never dream of behaving this way!

[Anonymous]

She sounds honest to me. What do you want her to do, lie?

[Anonymous]

Anyone rhat concerned about money might also dump you for other reasons if you stopped being the best option.

[Anonymous]

I am Eastern European. Yes, in some cultures it’s a part of the package. It’s totally ok for a woman to state that she expects a certain level of income from a man. It’s also totally ok for a man to divorce a woman should she get breast cancer - no one wants broken toys. Back home, doctors recommend women not to tell their husbands if they have ovarian or uterine cancer, just in case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am Eastern European. Yes, in some cultures it’s a part of the package. It’s totally ok for a woman to state that she expects a certain level of income from a man. It’s also totally ok for a man to divorce a woman should she get breast cancer - no one wants broken toys. Back home, doctors recommend women not to tell their husbands if they have ovarian or uterine cancer, just in case.

Sorry, not in my circle. Either you have a terrible circle, or you're a troll.

[Anonymous]

I’m Jamaican and yep this is kinda’ the norm.
My own father drilled in on my then fiance turned husband on that

[Anonymous]

In USA most women can get a good education and a chance to make money. It's a lot harder in many corrupt countries. Maybe the bank takes your money or maybe the government. I'm not going to speculate, but there's a reason so many people are still poor in capitalism.
I'm from EE and make money left and right in US. I can afford a man without money. She cannot. This means I can date a poor Latino and do I ever.
OP, why don't you show her how money is made in US. Money is so elusive to her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am Eastern European. Yes, in some cultures it’s a part of the package. It’s totally ok for a woman to state that she expects a certain level of income from a man. It’s also totally ok for a man to divorce a woman should she get breast cancer - no one wants broken toys. Back home, doctors recommend women not to tell their husbands if they have ovarian or uterine cancer, just in case.

Never heard such a thing. Must be the Balkans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm dating a woman from Latin America and we were talking about what we value in a partner. I asked her if she would be with me if I made less money than her, she said no.

She said in her culture it's completely normal to expect this in a man and it's not seen as "gold digging" behavior to admit this out loud. While in the US women are a bit more embarrassed to admit they prefer a man who earns more.

Would you say this is true?

That's not a good sign OP.

But yes many men make more south of the border than women, so it might seem more normalized there to say that, but it is still considered gold digging and not a good sign.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm dating a woman from Latin America and we were talking about what we value in a partner. I asked her if she would be with me if I made less money than her, she said no.

She said in her culture it's completely normal to expect this in a man and it's not seen as "gold digging" behavior to admit this out loud. While in the US women are a bit more embarrassed to admit they prefer a man who earns more.

Would you say this is true?

That's not a good sign OP.

But yes many men make more south of the border than women, so it might seem more normalized there to say that, but it is still considered gold digging and not a good sign.

Oh, and in addition to this, don't view all Hispanics as a homogenous group that all act and think and vote alike. That's silly.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. American women really speak out of both sides of their mouths.