Mental Health Program for teen - what to do next
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Anonymous
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Over the past 8 months, my teen has been in 2, 60-day residential mental programs and 2, 2-week hospital mental health programs for self-harm, depression, severe inability to get along with others, stealing, alcohol use, vaping, and suicidal thoughts and acts. My teen will be discharged, or even kicked out early for behavior issues, from the 2nd, 60-day program very soon. I'm at a loss of what to do next. My teen has made no progress in these programs. Once departing the residential facility, my teen attends a day program...which recommends within a few weeks readmittance into a residential facility. It's a terrible cycle with no end in site.
My teen cannot be left unsupervised at home...it's almost as if a full-time babysitter is needed. I'm worried for my teen's safety and my safety. I'm getting no advice from the mental health facility about next steps. I don't know what to do when my teen returns home. |
Anonymous
| Join the FB group WTRS---Wilderness Therapy and Residential Search. It sounds like he may need a longer more intensive residential program. |
Anonymous
| How old is your child. |
Anonymous
| Op-14 |
Anonymous
| We had a similar situation - not all the issues, but regular residential not "working" i.e. kid refused to engage with program - and wilderness was a complete game changer. Maybe look at those programs for a next step. |
Anonymous
| I’m sorry I’m not going to be too much help but I had a colleague whose son was totally turned around by a longer term residential program in Montana or the dakotas. She used a counselor/consultant that helped her find a facility. I’m sorry I don’t have specific names. They did private pay and it was not cheap. I don’t know if insurance ended up reimbursing any. |
Anonymous
| Tell him if he’s violent at him, the cops will be coming to take him to juvenile lock-up. |
Anonymous
*home |
Anonymous
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It's really hard. We were in your shoes and eventually our kid took the treatment seriously. you also have to recognize you and your family needs to be part of the recovery.
They didn't wake up one day and say, I am going to be like this. I suggest a program that has requirements to stay in treatment in sober homes or group homes |
Anonymous
Yes - this. |
Anonymous
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I am really sorry and I've BTDT and on the other side with a young adult son who has turned things completely around. I agree with the others who suggested wilderness. But, you will likely have to have the money to pay for it and it's expensive. and it takes time to get it set up, though not too much. If you are worried about transporting him there, services exist.
In the meantime, it is important to take care of yourself and your family. In particular, you need to keep everyone safe. IME, doctors and other professionals will tell you to lock up knives, weapons, medications and whatever else they can think of that could be used as a weapon. And that's a good idea. But it isn't an answer because as my child showed me, everything is a weapon and you cannot protect yourself from someone who wants to harm you and you can't protect someone who wants to harm themselves. Lock up all of your valuables and your car keys. Get alcohol out of the house because you can't keep a Houdini out of the liquor cabinet even if it is locked. If you have to, sleep with your valuables and car keys under your pillow. And if you have to do that, maybe sleep with your door locked and a chair under the doorknob. Hard as this thought is, do what you can to get your child treatment. But, be careful about sacrificing your family to avoid your child getting into the juvenile justice system. Sometimes the system can fix a child and sometimes all it does is protect the family. And sometimes it's all you have to keep your family safe. We tried everything and some things, like intensive residential treatment in an outdoor program (not wilderness, but wilderness lite), were really good in the moment. We also had great school services. It all helped - sometimes for a minute and sometimes in ways we didn't see for years to come (like the benefit of getting a HS diploma because of amazing school services wasn't obvious until he stabilized a few years down the road). But what ended up working was putting my child out (which was after he was an adult, so not an option for you as it was not for us for a few years) and requiring him to develop a plan to come back at the same time as getting optimal medication, which was no small feat. Between getting medication compliance and getting a doctor who would really listen to him, it was unbelievably difficult. I just tried to put six years into a couple of short paragraphs. I hope something I said can give you an idea about your next steps and give you hope. |
Anonymous
| Agree Wilderness and hire a consultant if you can to ensure it’s a legit program |
Anonymous
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Educational consultant is key to finding the right program and getting you into one.
In our experience this is expensive but priceless. The Facebook group that was suggested is a great place to start to find a consultant. Best of luck it can be a very long and isolating journey. |
Anonymous
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Avoid “wilderness” programs.
https://www.theregreview.org/2023/07/05/krishnan-the-troubling-reality-of-wilderness-therapy/ |
Anonymous
Or better yet, listen to the parents for whom Wilderness worked wonders. Certainly any program you send your kid to must be thoroughly vetted. Hiring a consultant to recommend a program and therapist at the program for your kid is optimal. There are always bad actors, bad programs, bad doctors, bad schools, etc. Not all Wilderness programs are bad. Some are great. I know this because my kid is doing great. Kid even thanked us for getting kid the help s/he needed. |