Our family is looking for a new church in Northern Virginia. Our old church is very sleepy and most of the members are in their 90s. You’re looking for a place for our kids, who are teenagers, to get excited about. It would be ideal to have youth group activities full of “normal kids.”
My kids are more outgoing, sporty, into the latest trends, etc., and I’m not judging it at all, but it would be nice to have some kids that were the same. Tell me about your church and what makes it great!! |
You're going to have to give way, way more info than that to get a decent answer. Do you have strong feelings about denominations? What kind of political or social justice bent do you prefer? How do you feel about denominations that do or don't ordain women? |
A little more information would be helpful. What denominations are you open to? Are you looking for a church that defines itself as more "true to Scripture" (ex: most Baptists and Congregationalists, PCA, ACNA, etc) or more "mainline" (ex: Episcopalian, Methodist, PCUSA, etc.)? Do you have worship style preferences?
The kids at my kids' youth group seem very "normal" - tons of travel sports, everyone dresses just like they do at school - but it's theologically conservative and politically fairly diverse. Some people are going to have issues with the theology, and especially (on this board at least) the positions that theology makes the church take on cultural issues. Plus the worship ranges from traditional to fairly subdued modern, not rock concert. And the services are long. If your family is looking for the more worship-as-concert-with-short-message vibe, that's not us. |
Are the kids active in youth group? Can you share the name of the church? We are looking for a more right leaning church, but are open to other options. We are presbyterian, but open to a non denominational Christian church as well and tend to gravitate more towards those. We like less hymns but not quite a full concert (think Mclean Bible - too concerty) |
We're at The Falls Church Anglican and it might be a fit. Pastors are fairly similar to the PCA (not so much to the PCUSA, so if that's the Presbyterian you mean then it may not fit), though women can be ordained here unlike the PCA and that was a hard no for some friends of ours. The 11 o'clock service is less hymns and also not as much liturgy (nobody's wearing robes, but you still have to kneel and stand). Youth group is a few hundred kids 6th-12th and there's tons to do both on Sunday evening and during the week. |
Sounds like OP doesn't care much about the denomination as long as other criteria are met. Sounds like she's looking more for a family social club than a church. Why not? if you're going to worship God, it might as well be a place where the kids are happy. |
I mean yes, other more important things being equal it's great to worship God in a place that your kids want to attend as well. However before that you want to be worshipping God in the way that - as best you understand from Scripture and any other authority you think it's from God (ex: the Pope if Catholic) - he wants you to worship him. He's even more important than the kids. |
OP here, and yes I agree to all of that. My kids go to a small Christian school, so they are reading Scripture daily, we pray together, they do a church service in school, take a class on the Bible every year, etc.
We DO worship God, but we also want a church "family". When we go to our current church with older people, there is no extension after Sunday service. It feels like we are checking a box. We want to find families that can be part of a small group, who we can pray with, etc... families that will push us to grow in our faith. You are making it sound like my wants are surface level, but they actually go much deeper than that. Having kids who go to church with other kids and want to spend time growing their faith with them, and want to be at church, that all matters. |
Maybe ask where some of the Christian kids your kids go to school with go to church? Also, be prepared for at least one of your children to rebel and become a non-church goer at some point and maybe even a non-believer. It often happens with kids whose parents push them to be religious. |
100% agree with the first sentence. My kids have many kids at their youth group who found it through school friends - our youth group welcomes kids who don't regularly attend our church and may not have a youth group at their home church. As for the last paragraph, it's far less common that PP wants to pretend. I grew up in an environment where parents took their kids to church every time the church doors were open, signed us up for church classes (or created them for us), brought us to church social activities, sent us to private Christian school, etc. More kids of serious religious parents than not stick with the faith. Especially kids who have been well grounded in theology AND see the people around them living the faith out. Basically what OP is trying to do. This is borne out by both data and my own experience. I don't know all that many kids I grew up with who are no longer practicing. |
I think bc our school is SO small I was looking for a church that wasn’t totally our school - so that my kids could meet some other Christians and make friends outside of school. |
If you like the school, and the kids like it and have friends there, it seems a good place to find a church. |
I understand but do you have any core beliefs that would be crucial? I was raised UCC for instance and wouldn't be happy in a church that excluded female ministers. |
In contrast, I know lots of people who went to religious school who are now atheists. |
I would look into both Falls Church Anglican and Truro Anglican in Fairfax. We attend Truro, but our kids aren’t old enough for youth group yet. It is a little smaller than FCA. Also try McLean Pres (has several campuses around NoVa). |