How much to share with the school

[Anonymous]

When advocating for services for my 13 yo ds, we always have to discuss his behaviors. I feel like I have to make him sound as bad as possible to get what he needs in his IEP. Then, I feel like maybe I’m putting a target on his back with the school and administration when I do this. Does anyone else feel this way?

[Anonymous]

yep, but if you don't share they will say he's fine, until the day he is not and w/o the IEP he won't be protected

[Anonymous]

I feel the same way. I had to highlight all his worst behaviors to get an IEP. With proper support, they will never see those behaviors but I do worry about the first impression.

[Anonymous]

OP are you talking about home behaviors or school behaviors? Presumably they already know about the school behaviors. For home behaviors, schools never cared. Those were at home. Schools had no interest in hearing about them, and felt no responsibility whatsoever for addressing them. (Public school in a wealthy DMV suburb.)

I'm not saying it's appropriate for an IEP team to be so disinterested. We eventually pulled our kid out to private school. I'm just saying that your worry about making your kid an administration target may be misplaced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP are you talking about home behaviors or school behaviors? Presumably they already know about the school behaviors.

We are moving back in district and he’s due for his triennial eval. They are asking about school behaviors

[Anonymous]

I would be honest, but I’d also start with strengths. Ask that those strengths be mentioned in the IEP. I never judged any parents regarding their kid’s needs. I was annoyed by parents that kept saying they had no problems at home, when I knew that was a lie.