Should we give it another try?

[Anonymous]

Two years ago I met a man who felt like he was perfect for me. We cliqued right away and were inseparable for almost a year. As things started tog et more serious and we talked moving in together, he out of nowhere pulled away. Things ended and we didn't stay in contact. A few weeks ago he reached out and asked to go to dinner. We talked all night and the magic was still there. He said he would like to give it another shot. He told me the first go round he recognized we had a special connection, but wasn't used to in his words "being loved so deeply". He started therapy while we were apart and has been exploring why being loved makes him feel skittish. He says he is better now and wants us to be together again.

Would you give this another chance? The first go round I felt like we would grow old together. Breaking up really hurt.

[Anonymous]

Timing is like 80% of why relationships make it or don't. There is no rule here and it is entirely impossible to know if you should give it another chance.

It does sound like you want to, so go ahead. I give you permission. Just don't rush into anything.

[Anonymous]

How old are both of you and have you been married before?

[Anonymous]

I thought this was asking if you should get another TV.

[Anonymous]

I would. If the same thing happens this time, then never again, but give it a go if you still like him.

[Anonymous]

No.

[Anonymous]

At least let him clap dem cheeks one more time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Two years ago I met a man who felt like he was perfect for me. We cliqued right away and were inseparable for almost a year. As things started tog et more serious and we talked moving in together, he out of nowhere pulled away. Things ended and we didn't stay in contact. A few weeks ago he reached out and asked to go to dinner. We talked all night and the magic was still there. He said he would like to give it another shot. He told me the first go round he recognized we had a special connection, but wasn't used to in his words "being loved so deeply". He started therapy while we were apart and has been exploring why being loved makes him feel skittish. He says he is better now and wants us to be together again.

Would you give this another chance? The first go round I felt like we would grow old together. Breaking up really hurt.

Nope, huge red flag. He'll hurt you again. You can do better.

[Anonymous]

A second chance... but never a third. If you still have feelings for him, go SLOW. If he can respect that and the vibes stay good, cool. People can and do change.

But simply saying isn't doing. Take your time and make room for the truth. If he tries to rush or come on too strong, that's a red flag. If he doesn't understand your hesitation, that's also a red flag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A second chance... but never a third. If you still have feelings for him, go SLOW. If he can respect that and the vibes stay good, cool. People can and do change.

But simply saying isn't doing. Take your time and make room for the truth. If he tries to rush or come on too strong, that's a red flag. If he doesn't understand your hesitation, that's also a red flag.

+1 to all of this. How old are you OP and how old is he?

[Anonymous]

I bet you haven't have any meaningful relationships since, if at all. That's why you jumped at his asking for a dinner date.

Give it another go. It's not like you have a better option.

[Anonymous]

OP here. To answer some questions…… I’m 32 and he’s 35, we don’t want kids so no rush. I had another relationship after him that was good, but haven’t had any relationship before or after that felt as comfortable as with him.

He does understand why I would be hesitant and that moving slow is a must if we are to try again.

[Anonymous]

I'd give it a chance, but I'd be cautious. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd give it a chance, but I'd be cautious. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.

+1. If you like him yes I’d give it another chance. Once. And slowly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. To answer some questions…… I’m 32 and he’s 35, we don’t want kids so no rush. I had another relationship after him that was good, but haven’t had any relationship before or after that felt as comfortable as with him.

He does understand why I would be hesitant and that moving slow is a must if we are to try again.

If he doesn't understand why you are skittish, then he needs more therapy. No matter, don't rush it.