Am I becoming asexual? I really hope not...

[Anonymous]

Am I becoming asexual? I really hope not......I am 46 years old and for the past 4 months while I still have need to have sex, I don't feel any pleasure during sexual intimate moments with my DW

First let me clarify that I still find her attractive, love her and I am not interested in having sex with anyone else. Of course I should rather discuss this with my wife instead of strangers on the Internet. I just hope that some of you have gone through a similar experience and would love to hear your story. The last time I want is my DW being sad and disappointed that I have been feeling this way. I am sure she has probably noticed already but I have been taking it quite well.we still have sex regularly at least 3 times a week.

To the homophobes no I am not gay..Actually I wish I were gay that way I could at least leave my wife for another man so she doesn't waste her time having sex with someone who doesn't even like women.

Furthermore I don't watch porn and I am not having an affair.

4 months ago for example as soon as we start PIV I get this immense sense of pleasure and subsequently enjoy the session. Now nothing. I go in nothing nothing.

Is this a sign of depression? If yes if I see a therapy and address if I hope I get out of this sad situation.

And also my erections are still strong so not an ED issue.

[Anonymous]

The fact that you can pinpoint when you started feeling this way seems like depression to me..see a therapist ASAP. As a man of similar age take this seriously. Depression is very common for men our age and extremely difficult to fix for men in general.

[Anonymous]

OP - what do you mean “not feeling pleasure”? You don’t O? Or you do finish but it’s very weak ? Not sure I understand as a woman

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - what do you mean “not feeling pleasure”? You don’t O? Or you do finish but it’s very weak ? Not sure I understand as a woman

OP. I do finish but without O or at least weaker O compared to a few months before. It's not about my DW it's a me issue and that's I am wondering if others have been in a similar situation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - what do you mean “not feeling pleasure”? You don’t O? Or you do finish but it’s very weak ? Not sure I understand as a woman

OP. I do finish but without O or at least weaker O compared to a few months before. It's not about my DW it's a me issue and that's I am wondering if others have been in a similar situation

I’ve met a man who had very weak Os. He needed to have threesomes for higher dopamine dose to finish strong. I would say your brain stopped developing hormones of happiness at the same rate as before. Get hormones checked, too.

[Anonymous]

Just want to be clear - you still have a drive/need/desire for se* three times per week, can maintain an erection…but in the midst of the act - lack sensation and the ability to O in the same way you did just 4 months ago?

This sounds medical to me; I would see a urologist. The fact that it’s a recent change…yes, this could occur with depression but I would rule out other causes. Have you started a new medication in the last four months?

[Anonymous]

Are you experiencing numbness down there? Are you a cyclist? Any other changes in your body recently that you’ve noticed? Changes in your mental health?

[Anonymous]

Pelvic floor dysfunction? Constipation? Stress? I googled for you, haha.

[Anonymous]

If you've regularly been having sex 3x.a week you might just be bored. Take a break and plan a big date night. Have sex somewhere else like a nice hotel after, or whatever thing might sound fun.

[Anonymous]

So, OP has an extremely strong sex life in every way, but has a vague feeling of "not liking it"?

Sounds like the "7 Year Itch" / "Bull wants a new cow".
You're bored of your wife / life.

[Anonymous]

I have that question about my DW. She is 45, never “0”, and hasn’t initiated since conceiving , and not a particularly sexual person. Is she asexual?

[Anonymous]

OP Google "mindfulness".

Men unlike women have more issues being present during during sex. You need to learn to be in the moment and not let all the clusters in your mind get in the way.

Once you become proficient at mindfulness, you will enjoy having sex again with your DW.

[Anonymous]

Do you have what used to be for you "normal" sensitivity and sensation in your penis when you touch it or stroke yourself? Is self pleasure the same and piv sex...weak or no O?
This is data for your doctor.