No motivation at work

[Anonymous]

15 weeks pregnant (first pregnancy) and ever since I found out I was pregnant, I feel like I’ve lost all motivation at work.

I don’t know why but I feel like compared to let’s say a year ago, I have no desire to work as much as I did before. It’s more of a ‘I don’t really care about doing the work’ and so I just don’t put as much effort into it as I did before. Maybe it’s because I just don’t feel like it’s as important as everything else right now? Or maybe it’s hormones. I try to not let it affect my work (so far it hasn’t) but I look at my co-workers and they just put in so much more effort (they don’t have kids though) and I feel guilty. I know it’s going to be even harder to keep up with work once I get further along.

My boss still doesn’t know I’m pregnant (still not showing at all) but he will eventually find out very soon. I feel like he won’t like it very much since I’ll go on maternity leave soon and will take a long vacation after birth so I’m a bit worried about his reaction.

Anyone else feel this way at work when pregnant?

[Anonymous]

Just quit.

[Anonymous]

Do you plan to go back to work or SAH?

[Anonymous]

I think first trimester is really hard to work through. I was exhausted and yes, the hormones impact your mood a lot. Especially with the first pregnancy, there's also some mental overwhelm -- I remember spending my lunch hour researching and figuring out who my OB would be, starting to make lists of stuff we needed to do before the baby came, etc., and pivoting from that back to work was often hard. With subsequent kids you don't have to do all of that and the early part of your pregnancy is way less disruptive.

Do NOT make big decisions about leaving your job or becoming a SAHM right now. Just get through it. Later in the second and third trimester are usually a bit easier (not quite so tired and your body will have acclimated to the hormones) and also once you start telling people and showing, it becomes more real and this actually reduces the mental load as certain things fall into place (childcare, the exact details of your leave, prepping the house, etc.).

I say all this as someone who did in fact decide to leave my job and stay home for a couple years after my first baby. That was the right decision for me, but 15 weeks is not the time to make that decision. Unless the plan all along has been for you to quit and stay home, don't make a choice like that now when your are still physically acclimating to pregnancy and the whole thing is a secret.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you plan to go back to work or SAH?

I will go back to work, no thoughts of quitting. It’s just a phase right now probably.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think first trimester is really hard to work through. I was exhausted and yes, the hormones impact your mood a lot. Especially with the first pregnancy, there's also some mental overwhelm -- I remember spending my lunch hour researching and figuring out who my OB would be, starting to make lists of stuff we needed to do before the baby came, etc., and pivoting from that back to work was often hard. With subsequent kids you don't have to do all of that and the early part of your pregnancy is way less disruptive.

Do NOT make big decisions about leaving your job or becoming a SAHM right now. Just get through it. Later in the second and third trimester are usually a bit easier (not quite so tired and your body will have acclimated to the hormones) and also once you start telling people and showing, it becomes more real and this actually reduces the mental load as certain things fall into place (childcare, the exact details of your leave, prepping the house, etc.).

I say all this as someone who did in fact decide to leave my job and stay home for a couple years after my first baby. That was the right decision for me, but 15 weeks is not the time to make that decision. Unless the plan all along has been for you to quit and stay home, don't make a choice like that now when your are still physically acclimating to pregnancy and the whole thing is a secret.

Thank you so much for this! Yes the first trimester was the worst and I’m finally feeling much better now.

I’ve never thought about leaving my job and I actually like having a routine. It’s just the mental part that’s getting to me. I think I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that I’m going to be a mom very soon, so maybe that’s why! Like you said, once I start showing more and when people start to notice, I think that’s when it’s going be more real and hopefully easier.

[Anonymous]

I would say to let your boss/colleagues know. I’m sure they will be so excited and be lenient with you and make some accommodations. I was sooo nervous to tell my boss but I’m so happy I did bc they were soo excited for me and was quick to tell me let them know how they can help.

Also, take some PTO. Have some time to focus on you and your partner. Plan a little trip or just take some long weekends.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I cared less about my job once I got pregnant and had kids. That actually turned out to be better for my mental health. When my career was the most important thing in my life, anything frustrating that happened at work would ruin my day, and work stuff always took priority over social stuff. I never felt like I was getting out of my career what I was putting into it. Now my family is my priority, so the work drama rolls off me more easily. I refuse to work on weekends, because that is family time, so I’ve gotten more efficient during the work day and learned to say “no” to extra tasks and chatty coworkers. No, I’m not going to win any awards for employee of the year, but I’m satisfied with how things are going. And I’m also happy to be working, because as much as I love my family, I don’t think I’m cut out to be a SAHM. All that is to say, maybe the low motivation is a sign that your life has been out of balance and it’s time to recalibrate. Work is important, but maybe it shouldn’t be the most important thing.

[Anonymous]

I have a small business and I expect employees to perform the job for which they were hired. Pregnancy is not an excuse to not do your job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a small business and I expect employees to perform the job for which they were hired. Pregnancy is not an excuse to not do your job.

OP is still getting the work done. She’s just not feeling it is as important as she once thought. That makes complete sense given the major transitions she is experiencing.

Pregnancy is a protected class, and it can be excuse for not doing certain kinds of work. OP is entitled to some reasonable accommodations. As a manager, you should be very careful when dealing with pregnant employees, lest you find yourself accused of discrimination.

Ultimately, managers who are supportive of their pregnant employees will go a long way toward creating a positive workplace environment for everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a small business and I expect employees to perform the job for which they were hired. Pregnancy is not an excuse to not do your job.

OP is still getting the work done. She’s just not feeling it is as important as she once thought. That makes complete sense given the major transitions she is experiencing.

Pregnancy is a protected class, and it can be excuse for not doing certain kinds of work. OP is entitled to some reasonable accommodations. As a manager, you should be very careful when dealing with pregnant employees, lest you find yourself accused of discrimination.

Ultimately, managers who are supportive of their pregnant employees will go a long way toward creating a positive workplace environment for everyone.

Presumably, OP has a desk job. There is no reason for her to ask for, or expect, any accommodations to perform the job she was hired to do. If, in fact, she needs special accomodations, then she better be prepared to present medical proof. Otherwise, she can ask for unpaid leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a small business and I expect employees to perform the job for which they were hired. Pregnancy is not an excuse to not do your job.

OP is still getting the work done. She’s just not feeling it is as important as she once thought. That makes complete sense given the major transitions she is experiencing.

Pregnancy is a protected class, and it can be excuse for not doing certain kinds of work. OP is entitled to some reasonable accommodations. As a manager, you should be very careful when dealing with pregnant employees, lest you find yourself accused of discrimination.

Ultimately, managers who are supportive of their pregnant employees will go a long way toward creating a positive workplace environment for everyone.

Presumably, OP has a desk job. There is no reason for her to ask for, or expect, any accommodations to perform the job she was hired to do. If, in fact, she needs special accomodations, then she better be prepared to present medical proof. Otherwise, she can ask for unpaid leave.

You're not exactly on the right side of the law here. Look up the PWFA.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a small business and I expect employees to perform the job for which they were hired. Pregnancy is not an excuse to not do your job. [/quote]

OP is still getting the work done. She’s just not feeling it is as important as she once thought. That makes complete sense given the major transitions she is experiencing.

Pregnancy is a protected class, and it can be excuse for not doing certain kinds of work. OP is entitled to some reasonable accommodations. As a manager, you should be very careful when dealing with pregnant employees, lest you find yourself accused of discrimination.

Ultimately, managers who are supportive of their pregnant employees will go a long way toward creating a positive workplace environment for everyone.[/quote]

Presumably, OP has a desk job. There is no reason for her to ask for, or expect, any accommodations to perform the job she was hired to do. If, in fact, she needs special accomodations, then she better be prepared to present medical proof. Otherwise, she can ask for unpaid leave.[/quote]


You're not exactly on the right side of the law here. Look up the PWFA. [/quote]

Employers can fire with impunity.

[Anonymous]

Employers can fire with impunity.

Employees can sue employers for wrongful termination.

So why are you firing OP?

[Anonymous]

Yes, I felt that way when pregnant. I think it's a combination of being very tired and having your main focus on something not work related. Both pregnancies I felt like I could barely get work done early on.