Missing practice for other tryouts

Anonymous
If your DC has to miss practice because they want to attend a tryout at a different club, are you honest with the coach about this? I have heard mixed things. Between attending a couple practices ahead of tryouts and then the actual tryouts, it’s hard to keep coming up with reasons not to be at practice. DC is probably leaning toward leaving more than staying at this point, but it partly depends on what kind of offers (if any) they get. Better to just be honest or not? Seems like coach will be annoyed with the missed practices either way…
Anonymous
I wouldn't give a reason. What are they going to do call to ask you why you missed? If they do ask I'd just say we had something come up. You don't need to share personal details.
Anonymous
Youngest kid will be a senior next year. Been in this since 2010.

Don't tell. They are vindictive. All of them. And don't tell teammates--even ones you think are friends use it to their advantage--their parents tell the coach, etc., while being phony to your face. This happened to my kid when he was 12 and they black balled him. At club tryouts they didn't even put him on the side with current players--banished him to the outer fields.

Keep everything close to your chest. What they don't know can't hurt them.

We had a coach give some long speech about how he always knows who is trying out elsewhere that it gets back to him---be honest, etc. This same coach would string kids along and they think they have their spot--and then would demote literally when all tryouts elsewhere were over. He offered no such transparency himself.

There are so many d*cks in this business. Clubs do not have loyalty. Your job is to find your own kid the healthiest environment to develop. The best training, etc. You need to reassess each year and let them lead the charge--if they are happy I wouldn't move them (even if they could develop better elsewhere). You want them to love the game. But, if they express frustration or they want more intensity THEMSELVES, etc--help them find it.

Kids get screwed over a lot if you stay in this sport. Protect your own.


Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't give a reason. What are they going to do call to ask you why you missed? If they do ask I'd just say we had something come up. You don't need to share personal details.


+1 use school event, grandma's 80th bday, minor illness, etc. Get creative. lol
Anonymous
Trust No One
Anonymous
Yes and even if you aren't planning on returning, register for your teams tryouts, attend the tryouts, and try and stall on telling them as long as possible. they will take it out on your kid.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Youngest kid will be a senior next year. Been in this since 2010.

Don't tell. They are vindictive. All of them. And don't tell teammates--even ones you think are friends use it to their advantage--their parents tell the coach, etc., while being phony to your face. This happened to my kid when he was 12 and they black balled him. At club tryouts they didn't even put him on the side with current players--banished him to the outer fields.

Keep everything close to your chest. What they don't know can't hurt them.

We had a coach give some long speech about how he always knows who is trying out elsewhere that it gets back to him---be honest, etc. This same coach would string kids along and they think they have their spot--and then would demote literally when all tryouts elsewhere were over. He offered no such transparency himself.

There are so many d*cks in this business. Clubs do not have loyalty. Your job is to find your own kid the healthiest environment to develop. The best training, etc. You need to reassess each year and let them lead the charge--if they are happy I wouldn't move them (even if they could develop better elsewhere). You want them to love the game. But, if they express frustration or they want more intensity THEMSELVES, etc--help them find it.

Kids get screwed over a lot if you stay in this sport. Protect your own.




+1
We switched clubs last season. My kid was very excited and she made the mistake of (at U10) mentioning this to a teammate. Word spread like wildfire. The coach wouldn't even look me in the eye. Then, after being asked to guest-play up 1 year on the top team in a tournament, my kid only got 5 min per game when she would usually got about half a game guest playing. One coach was a jerk. One coach was nice and wished my DD good luck...but there were no formal goodbyes.

Also, yes other parents may complain about you to the coach in an attempt to suck up if they hear you are leaving, while other parents might applaud your exit and say they are right behind you. Despite my effort to keep things hush-hush, my kid couldn't help it, told 1 other layer and then everybody knew in 2 days.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Youngest kid will be a senior next year. Been in this since 2010.

Don't tell. They are vindictive. All of them. And don't tell teammates--even ones you think are friends use it to their advantage--their parents tell the coach, etc., while being phony to your face. This happened to my kid when he was 12 and they black balled him. At club tryouts they didn't even put him on the side with current players--banished him to the outer fields.

Keep everything close to your chest. What they don't know can't hurt them.

We had a coach give some long speech about how he always knows who is trying out elsewhere that it gets back to him---be honest, etc. This same coach would string kids along and they think they have their spot--and then would demote literally when all tryouts elsewhere were over. He offered no such transparency himself.

There are so many d*cks in this business. Clubs do not have loyalty. Your job is to find your own kid the healthiest environment to develop. The best training, etc. You need to reassess each year and let them lead the charge--if they are happy I wouldn't move them (even if they could develop better elsewhere). You want them to love the game. But, if they express frustration or they want more intensity THEMSELVES, etc--help them find it.

Kids get screwed over a lot if you stay in this sport. Protect your own.




Exact thing happened to my son.

Beware if you care. We tunred the spot down and tried several clubs over the summer and found a great new spot we never thought would work.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Yes and even if you aren't planning on returning, register for your teams tryouts, attend the tryouts, and try and stall on telling them as long as possible. they will take it out on your kid.


THIS. Fake it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Youngest kid will be a senior next year. Been in this since 2010.

Don't tell. They are vindictive. All of them. And don't tell teammates--even ones you think are friends use it to their advantage--their parents tell the coach, etc., while being phony to your face. This happened to my kid when he was 12 and they black balled him. At club tryouts they didn't even put him on the side with current players--banished him to the outer fields.

Keep everything close to your chest. What they don't know can't hurt them.

We had a coach give some long speech about how he always knows who is trying out elsewhere that it gets back to him---be honest, etc. This same coach would string kids along and they think they have their spot--and then would demote literally when all tryouts elsewhere were over. He offered no such transparency himself.

There are so many d*cks in this business. Clubs do not have loyalty. Your job is to find your own kid the healthiest environment to develop. The best training, etc. You need to reassess each year and let them lead the charge--if they are happy I wouldn't move them (even if they could develop better elsewhere). You want them to love the game. But, if they express frustration or they want more intensity THEMSELVES, etc--help them find it.

Kids get screwed over a lot if you stay in this sport. Protect your own.




Our kids are a little older but this was the case for them too. Literally trust no one. It burns your kid every single time.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Youngest kid will be a senior next year. Been in this since 2010.

Don't tell. They are vindictive. All of them. And don't tell teammates--even ones you think are friends use it to their advantage--their parents tell the coach, etc., while being phony to your face. This happened to my kid when he was 12 and they black balled him. At club tryouts they didn't even put him on the side with current players--banished him to the outer fields.

Keep everything close to your chest. What they don't know can't hurt them.

We had a coach give some long speech about how he always knows who is trying out elsewhere that it gets back to him---be honest, etc. This same coach would string kids along and they think they have their spot--and then would demote literally when all tryouts elsewhere were over. He offered no such transparency himself.

There are so many d*cks in this business. Clubs do not have loyalty. Your job is to find your own kid the healthiest environment to develop. The best training, etc. You need to reassess each year and let them lead the charge--if they are happy I wouldn't move them (even if they could develop better elsewhere). You want them to love the game. But, if they express frustration or they want more intensity THEMSELVES, etc--help them find it.

Kids get screwed over a lot if you stay in this sport. Protect your own.




Exact thing happened to my son.

Beware if you care. We tunred the spot down and tried several clubs over the summer and found a great new spot we never thought would work.


It's so sick, isn't it?? I'm the pp. We shell out so much $$--if it were any other $3k-5k+ purchase we would research and shop around, etc. I always said if a Club was confident they were doing right by players and offering a great environment/quality training--they should welcome it, knowing kids would stay...not have to threaten them.
Anonymous
Learned this the hard way. My kid is now riding the bench and the coach is being awful to him, to the detriment of the entire team.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Learned this the hard way. My kid is now riding the bench and the coach is being awful to him, to the detriment of the entire team.


Ugh the season just started
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Learned this the hard way. My kid is now riding the bench and the coach is being awful to him, to the detriment of the entire team.


This is terrible. Can’t DC just stop going at this point if you know you’ll get in elsewhere? I don’t need my money back and if they are holding the player card, fine, we’ll jyst go to pickup games.
Anonymous
Lots of programs trap kids on a roster and dont play them.

They know other teams fill up and its really hard to move mid season.

I know coaches who offer kids just to cripple another ECNL team with no intention of playing the kid.
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