Making an appointment for your adult child

[Anonymous]

DC is 18 and is struggling with mental health (ongoing issues, but currently in a worse-than-usual place). I called the doctor’s office today to make them an appointment and was told that either DC needs to make the appointment, or they need to sign a waiver. (DC claims to have already signed the waiver, but that’s a different issue.)

I understand medical privacy, but I don’t get why medical privacy would prevent me from assisting my child with scheduling. In this case, it seems like putting this on DC right now creates a potential threat to DC’s health with no obvious privacy advantage.

What am I missing?

[Anonymous]

Your child needs to call.

[Anonymous]

I’m not sure. I’ve been allowed to make appointments of all types for my 19-year-old.

[Anonymous]

Why not call student health center and ask them to help you help your child.

[Anonymous]

What you’re missing in this. You need to do what your child needs you to do. And to get it done, you need to follow the rules set by others that control the process. What you’re missing is that you’re wasting energy questioning. Just do it the way they require it to be done and move on to what you can control. And I’m a BTDT.

[Anonymous]

At Kaiser, my access was restricted starting when my kids were 13, OP! They needed their own accounts in the portal, because I couldn't see their information under my name anymore. So I made accounts for them with passwords I could remember, and therefore I'm now able to make all the appointments and message providers on their behalf.

Some providers will do things differently. In you case, I'd either nag your kid to make the appointments, or find that waiver (or have him sign a new one) to make appointments on his behalf. If he's not well mentally, better have that waiver for future events.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What you’re missing in this. You need to do what your child needs you to do. And to get it done, you need to follow the rules set by others that control the process. What you’re missing is that you’re wasting energy questioning. Just do it the way they require it to be done and move on to what you can control. And I’m a BTDT.

OP here. I’m not unwilling, but DC may be unable. Which is why they need the appointment to begin with.

I think the only alternative would be to go to the ER, which doesn’t feel like a better (or necessary) option.

[Anonymous]

I work in healthcare. There is no regulation that prevents you from scheduling an appointment (only accessing appointment information after the fact). I have made appointments for my young adult children and also for my old adult mother. All of these people can and do make their own appointments as well, but for various reasons I have sometimes needed to schedule. Frankly the office you’re working with is being ridiculous under the circumstances I would look elsewhere. It’s OK to help your young adult child through a difficult time and the practical side of scheduling appointments can be a nightmare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What you’re missing in this. You need to do what your child needs you to do. And to get it done, you need to follow the rules set by others that control the process. What you’re missing is that you’re wasting energy questioning. Just do it the way they require it to be done and move on to what you can control. And I’m a BTDT.

OP here. I’m not unwilling, but DC may be unable. Which is why they need the appointment to begin with.

I think the only alternative would be to go to the ER, which doesn’t feel like a better (or necessary) option.

You get the waiver, you "sign" it. Did we really need to spell that out for you? PP was pretty blunt but you didn't seem to get it.

[Anonymous]

That’s odd. I’ve never had a problem making an appointment either for my kids or my parents.

Is your kid the same sex as you? If so just say you’re them when making the appointment. I do this all the time for my daughters when I have to deal with insurance. I just say I’m them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC is 18 and is struggling with mental health (ongoing issues, but currently in a worse-than-usual place). I called the doctor’s office today to make them an appointment and was told that either DC needs to make the appointment, or they need to sign a waiver. (DC claims to have already signed the waiver, but that’s a different issue.)

I understand medical privacy, but I don’t get why medical privacy would prevent me from assisting my child with scheduling. In this case, it seems like putting this on DC right now creates a potential threat to DC’s health with no obvious privacy advantage.

What am I missing?

You got an idiot on the phone. Call them again at a different time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC is 18 and is struggling with mental health (ongoing issues, but currently in a worse-than-usual place). I called the doctor’s office today to make them an appointment and was told that either DC needs to make the appointment, or they need to sign a waiver. (DC claims to have already signed the waiver, but that’s a different issue.)

I understand medical privacy, but I don’t get why medical privacy would prevent me from assisting my child with scheduling. In this case, it seems like putting this on DC right now creates a potential threat to DC’s health with no obvious privacy advantage.

What am I missing?

You got an idiot on the phone. Call them again at a different time.

Could be something as simple as that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not sure. I’ve been allowed to make appointments of all types for my 19-year-old.

Same. I make appointments for my parent. Not sure how it's different.

[Anonymous]

Maybe it's solely due to the fact that this is a psychiatry appointment? I made a dentist's appointment for my 19 year old just last week. But I've never tried making a psych one for him as an adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not sure. I’ve been allowed to make appointments of all types for my 19-year-old.

I make appointments all the time for my wife? She is a teacher and can’t do it easily during the school day…

Granted these are straight up medical and dental appointments so maybe there is more sensitivity around mental health?

But they shouldn’t care who makes the appointment. That isn’t a HIPPA concern.