Appalling Parent Spectator Behavior
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Anonymous
| This weekend at a meet, I witnessed the worst swim parent behavior that I have ever seen, and I am still reeling from what I observed and what can be done about it. There is a family that is newer to our team, they have been there a little over a year. The child is a very good swimmer but also just 10 years old. These parents have been incredibly competitive and rude about their child, constantly focusing on who they want him to "beat," rather than the child's own progress, and have managed to alienate many other families but I'm not sure the coaches have really seen it yet. This past weekend, the father got very worked up as his kid was swimming and started yelling from the stands, "Come on, (child's name) - don't let that a**hole kid beat you!! Don't you dare let that a**hole kid beat you!!" I couldn't believe my ears but then the dad of the child who was indeed beating him stood up and turned around and called him out. This family is out of control and I am so embarrassed to be on the same team with them. I don't know if people have spoken with coaches about this incident and I don't know if I should say anything. This is such clear egregious unsportsmanlike conduct and I feel like the father should honestly be banned from meets for a while at least. Does safe sport apply to parent spectators? This dad has also chaperoned team travel trips and I don't think he should be allowed to do so. In my 10 years of being a parent in competitive swimming I have never seen behavior this extreme. What would you do? |
Anonymous
| Talk to the coach. If there are behavior rules for students, they should be applied to the parents as well. |
Anonymous
| Personally, I would say something to the head coach. |
Anonymous
Is there a team president/ceo/manager of sorts? I'd probably go there first. I don't know if this is universal among clubs, but some clubs have a parents handbooks that details anything from the admin stuff to expected standards of behavior. |
Anonymous
| How did he react when the other dad called him out? |
Anonymous
| I would speak to the coach, and, yes, safe sport applies to parents, which is why all parents have to do the training and submit the form. |
Anonymous
| The next time you witness that, you can go to the meet director. I've seen officials come up and talk to an out of control parent before. |
Anonymous
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Are you legally allowed to record the father? If you can, do so, then show it to the coaches and any higher-ups, and send it to SafeSport.
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Anonymous
| + 1 to filming and then post it on your team’s website. |
Anonymous
| Is there a group chat? I would send a text reminding parents of conduct. Quote the dad if not name him. |
Anonymous
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This is not hard. You tell the coach. I would have done it immediately after and put it in writing so you have a trail you reported the behavior.
If they don't do anything, escalate it in the club organization. |
Anonymous
Same poster back. Do not interact with the dad directly or try to police the behavior yourself. |
Anonymous
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Say something, and encourage the dad of the other involved swimmer to say something. Talk to the coach, and if that’s unsatisfactory, talk to whoever is in charge of managing the coach’s employment.
That is so incredibly crappy. |
Anonymous
| I would report to the club president directly. This is egregious and he should have been thrown out of the meet. Need it documented for when it inevitably happens again. |
Anonymous
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Damn.. I have a attended a lot of swim meets and never see anything like this. I can only imagine what it is like to be that man's son.
definitely report to the coach and head of the team. |