Why did the "my DH poked me in the cheek" thread get deleted?

[Anonymous]

It seemed like OP was getting some great advice about DV dynamics, and it seemed like an important topic. Why is it gone now?

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/0/1260922.page#29577035

[jsteele]

The poster is a troll.

[Anonymous]

Have they been posting a lot of fake posts in the relationship forum lately? I've reported a couple that seemed to be obvious trolls and they've all been deleted.

[Anonymous]

jsteele wrote:The poster is a troll.

Did they have a bad post history or something? There was nothing licentious or crazy in the post itself...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

jsteele wrote:The poster is a troll.

Did they have a bad post history or something? There was nothing licentious or crazy in the post itself...

I reported it as a troll. I had also reported the one last night that was the "DH made a gun sign at me". This has a similar vibe to it. Making a fake post about a DV situation is gross and should be deleted before people actually take the time to try to help someone who is trolling them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

jsteele wrote:The poster is a troll.

Did they have a bad post history or something? There was nothing licentious or crazy in the post itself...

I reported it as a troll. I had also reported the one last night that was the "DH made a gun sign at me". This has a similar vibe to it. Making a fake post about a DV situation is gross and should be deleted before people actually take the time to try to help someone who is trolling them.

And I reported it instead of writing troll so that if I was wrong....no one would know but Jeff and the thread would stay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

jsteele wrote:The poster is a troll.

Did they have a bad post history or something? There was nothing licentious or crazy in the post itself...

I reported it as a troll. I had also reported the one last night that was the "DH made a gun sign at me". This has a similar vibe to it. Making a fake post about a DV situation is gross and should be deleted before people actually take the time to try to help someone who is trolling them.

But... there are plenty of DV situations that start out small and escalate (almost all DV situations, in fact). I think a lot of women are confused as to whether a certain act crossed a line or not. So it seems like a really bad policy to just automatically assume the worst and silence threads where women are asking for clarity about physical acts of aggression

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

jsteele wrote:The poster is a troll.

Did they have a bad post history or something? There was nothing licentious or crazy in the post itself...

I reported it as a troll. I had also reported the one last night that was the "DH made a gun sign at me". This has a similar vibe to it. Making a fake post about a DV situation is gross and should be deleted before people actually take the time to try to help someone who is trolling them.

But... there are plenty of DV situations that start out small and escalate (almost all DV situations, in fact). I think a lot of women are confused as to whether a certain act crossed a line or not. So it seems like a really bad policy to just automatically assume the worst and silence threads where women are asking for clarity about physical acts of aggression

Jeff can look into it when it's reported. I'm guessing based on the OPs IP address and history, he was able to tell that the post was completely made up. That's the point of the report button. So that it can get looked into without derailing the thread and if Jeff finds evidence that it's a troll, he will remove it. If he doesn't or if he can't confirm it, he won't and no one will ever have known that someone thought it was made up except for Jeff and the person who reported it.

[Anonymous]

And sure, having a helpful post about borderline DV situations and what to do is great and important. Having a post like that where people are genuinely caring and trying to help someone who is making up the situation? Messed up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

jsteele wrote:The poster is a troll.

Did they have a bad post history or something? There was nothing licentious or crazy in the post itself...

I reported it as a troll. I had also reported the one last night that was the "DH made a gun sign at me". This has a similar vibe to it. Making a fake post about a DV situation is gross and should be deleted before people actually take the time to try to help someone who is trolling them.

But... there are plenty of DV situations that start out small and escalate (almost all DV situations, in fact). I think a lot of women are confused as to whether a certain act crossed a line or not. So it seems like a really bad policy to just automatically assume the worst and silence threads where women are asking for clarity about physical acts of aggression

Jeff can look into it when it's reported. I'm guessing based on the OPs IP address and history, he was able to tell that the post was completely made up. That's the point of the report button. So that it can get looked into without derailing the thread and if Jeff finds evidence that it's a troll, he will remove it. If he doesn't or if he can't confirm it, he won't and no one will ever have known that someone thought it was made up except for Jeff and the person who reported it.

I would love for him to clarify if there was a posting history or not. It seems like a lot of people get labelled as a "troll" because people just dont like the thread or dont want people to talk about it. If there was an IP history of misbehavior that's one thing but again, a lot of women experience these trickle acts of DV before they escalate into the real thing, so I would err on the side of caution with automatically not believing them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And sure, having a helpful post about borderline DV situations and what to do is great and important. Having a post like that where people are genuinely caring and trying to help someone who is making up the situation? Messed up.

I mean, even then, hypothetically the thread could help many other people. I found DCUM through doing a random google search and stumbling across a similar life experience. So it doesnt seem like a net negative, unless the OP is actively stirring up drama in the comments or sockpuppeting with contradictory responses.

[jsteele]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

jsteele wrote:The poster is a troll.

Did they have a bad post history or something? There was nothing licentious or crazy in the post itself...

I reported it as a troll. I had also reported the one last night that was the "DH made a gun sign at me". This has a similar vibe to it. Making a fake post about a DV situation is gross and should be deleted before people actually take the time to try to help someone who is trolling them.

But... there are plenty of DV situations that start out small and escalate (almost all DV situations, in fact). I think a lot of women are confused as to whether a certain act crossed a line or not. So it seems like a really bad policy to just automatically assume the worst and silence threads where women are asking for clarity about physical acts of aggression

Jeff can look into it when it's reported. I'm guessing based on the OPs IP address and history, he was able to tell that the post was completely made up. That's the point of the report button. So that it can get looked into without derailing the thread and if Jeff finds evidence that it's a troll, he will remove it. If he doesn't or if he can't confirm it, he won't and no one will ever have known that someone thought it was made up except for Jeff and the person who reported it.

I would love for him to clarify if there was a posting history or not. It seems like a lot of people get labelled as a "troll" because people just dont like the thread or dont want people to talk about it. If there was an IP history of misbehavior that's one thing but again, a lot of women experience these trickle acts of DV before they escalate into the real thing, so I would err on the side of caution with automatically not believing them.

I would not delete a thread of that sort on a whim. Of course I did my homework and found sufficient reasons to determine the poster was a troll.

[Anonymous]

I suppose Jeff could leave troll threads up but att a warning at the to saying "Troll thread! Treat story as fictional."

Or a concerned user could start a spinoff thread honestly stating a hypothetical scenario.