Single sex vs. co-ed high schools

[Anonymous]

As we are waiting for admissions decisions, what are your thoughts on this, especially for boys?

On one hand, single sex allows the kids to be their authentic selves in a learning environment without trying to impress the opposite sex. I'm also really drawn to the idea that the schools are educating them, but are also (in our case) raising young men. On the other hand, especially for the more introverted kids, how do they get to know and relate to their opposite sex peers?

Obviously, they will mature a lot in the next 4 years, but I'm looking at these shy, awkward boys who have all been together since kindergarten and wondering how on earth they ever get from here to having girlfriends and prom dates. And I say that chuckling -- these are great kids, but it's hard to picture.

Interested in others' thoughts and experiences. How did you make the decision regarding single sex or co-ed high school, and how did that play out? How is the social scene as they transition into high school?

[Anonymous]

I think it's more important for girls than boys. I went to both as a female. Much much better all female than co ed at that age for me.

[Anonymous]

They will either date or they won't, and where they go to school doesn't change that. Plenty of guys at boys schools have girlfriends, plenty at co-ed schools can't get a girl to notice they exist.

[Anonymous]

both my sons went to an all boys school, trust me these boys have zero issues finding girlfriends.

[Anonymous]

DD went to an all girls school and, had we have the chance to do it again, I think we would have pushed for a co-ed option. That said, we are considering an all boys school for DS and I attended an all girls HS. I think it just really depends on the kid and outside social/family/club/church networks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:both my sons went to an all boys school, trust me these boys have zero issues finding girlfriends.

Same for the girls at the all girls schools.

[Anonymous]

For those of you with kids at all boys or all girls schools, what's the social scene like? Do the schools have joint activities or do service projects together, or do they just wind up meeting at sports events and things like that?

[Anonymous]

Co-ed if you want to avoid raising a misogynist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Co-ed if you want to avoid raising a misogynist

That's pretty narrow minded. It obviously depends on the school, but an all boys environment actually has the potential to really address misogyny and challenge their young men to think and live differently.

[Anonymous]

DS is in 9th at an all-boy's school. He came from a co-ed school. He is thriving in the all-boys environment. Classes and teachers are geared toward boys, and he really feels free to be himself. So far, far less drama than at the co-ed. Social scene seems good, he has plenty of socializing opportunities with girls.

[Anonymous]

What kinds of socializing opportunities?

[Anonymous]

I went to public school and to me the idea of a single-sex school seemed strange. However, we now have children at both all-girls and all-boys schools and I see the benefits. Girls and boys have different learning styles and single-sex schools are able to focus on what works best for them; there are also fewer in-school distractions, of course.

We've found that there are many informal events where families with children at these schools organize informal social events for boys and girls and ... well, nature finds a way lol. I have zero concerns about my boys interacting with girls, and vice versa.

Honestly, single-sex schools, which were always the traditional way things were done not even that long ago, evolved for a reason and it wasn't for a bad reason either. It just works well. Boys and girls have plenty of opportunities to socialize outside of school. Just my take and my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For those of you with kids at all boys or all girls schools, what's the social scene like? Do the schools have joint activities or do service projects together, or do they just wind up meeting at sports events and things like that?

DS is at an all boys HS. There is a sister all girls HS basically on the same campus. There are joint dances/social events. The girls go to the boys sporting events and the cheerleaders are from the girl's school. They have plenty of interaction. They used to be able to take classes at the other campus but the boys switched to a block schedule and they don't do this anymore. Some of the service projects are joint but most aren't. They share some sport facilities (track, pool) so they intermingle all the time.

DS loves being at a single sex school. DD went to the girls school as well. She also wanted a single sex education. Her boyfriend is from the boys school (they're now in college).