Paternity leave unpaid - how much?

[Anonymous]

For those of you with partners who lack paid leave: how much did they take before returning to the office? Noting the possibility of working from home is a possibility on the table for him (he typically works from home 2-3 days per week). I will have 12 weeks paid.

[Anonymous]

He had 4 days. 2 spent at birth. I was entirely unpaid minus my own savings. (Self employed).

If he can be home/fully off every other day for a few weeks that will give you the most benefit.

Taking leave closer to your transition back to work and banking days for starting daycare will prove valuable.

If you can afford having someone come in to clean or support household things or have friend/family nearby that is good too. Don’t be afraid to sign up for a mealtrain. Folks want to help

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For those of you with partners who lack paid leave: how much did they take before returning to the office? Noting the possibility of working from home is a possibility on the table for him (he typically works from home 2-3 days per week). I will have 12 weeks paid.

First pregnancy he took 1 week off. My water broke Sun night but I delivered Tuesday night. Discharged Friday, he was back at work Monday/Tuesday. He did have the ability to WAH but his bosses were more strict about it when they knew we had a baby at home. They also begrudged him taking leave for sick days and appointments. A mess of a place obviously.

Second he has 12 weeks and I have 0. I planned for 6 unpaid but took 8 because I had a severe hemorrhage and post op infection and then our baby had to be readmitted to the NICU for jaundice (#2 phototherapy) so the first two weeks were not recovery oriented.

You need time to recover and sleep and have someone help you with meals/etc. This is somewhat dependent on your outside family help, what you outsource with funds, your baby and whether they have any issues/colic, whether you breastfeed or use formula, and how your delivery and recovery goes.

Do not have a hard-set line. You may need more; you may need less. You may be okay by yourself during the day and only need him WAH but you may need him to take lots of leave if your baby goes to daycare later on because of all the illnesses.

You should plan on at least 1-2 weeks at minimum for your own sanity and recovery. 2-4 weeks with him WAH for 3 days minimum and then see how it goes. You should also work out what part of the night he will cover so you can have a break even though he is working. And he should get into the habit of starting laundry, prepping food, etc. in the morning- if he doesnt already participate in those household tasks- so you arent boggled with housework on days that he goes into the office.