| Does "drop the rope" mean "surrender in tug-of-war" or "stop pulling all the weight of saving other people" ? |
| It means the latter. Stop doing everything for everyone. Mostly applied to women who burn themselves out being all things for everyone. Example - "My husband is now responsible for his family's Christmas gifts. I dropped the rope." |
| It's a lower class aphorism. |
| I thought it was related to Drop the Soap! |
| Stop tying your kids shoes for them, let them learn, drop the rope |
Put laces on your kids' shoes, not rope. |
What are some upper class aphorisms? "Fire the Governess" ? |
|
The origin of the phrase is from the tug of war concept. It means that when someone pulls on a rope you hold, leading you to react to their needs/provocations/demands, you can also choose to drop it, meaning to not react at all. It takes some work, usually, especially if you've conditioned yourself to always responding, in a positive or negative way. A more recently invented, and more specific, application of dropping the rope is going grey rock. This is for situations where people are harassing you, verbally or psychologically, because they have a need for constant attention, and even prefer negative attention to nothing at all. Being as unresponsive and unobtrusive as a grey rock sometimes deflects their attentions to another target. |
|
| I thought it meant “let go of any connection to this person,” as in, stop putting any effort into the relationship because it’s not worth it. |
|
Imagine a rope outstretched, a person holding each end. It takes two.
I think it means more though. When one person jerks the rope it creates a wave. It is felt by the other person. If the other person takes any action, the wave continues or increases. |
"Let them eat cake" is a an oldie but goodie. |
I always thought of the reference bing like jump rope rather than tug of war (or being part of a mountain climbing team). So not so much carrying all the load but being a necessary part of whatever the plan is. |
But the soap has a rope so you don't drop the soap! |
| I only ever hear that term here, when DWs are complaining about their MIL, other ILs, and handling everything that everyone on this board thinks should be done by DH or just not done at all. Never hear this said IRL. |