Why men like mean women?

[Anonymous]

I'm an attractive, kind and nice woman (deep in my heart, so I feel uncomfortable not to be reciprocal or accepting favors without giving back). I noticed that when I "use" the guy as a working horse - always ask him to do things for me, task with errands, decline dates that are not posh enough, and otherwise make him "serve" my interests they gets more and more attached. When I treat men nicely (invite over to my place to cook dinner, reciprocate with inviting them for dates etc), they quickly dump me. Like, within 2-3 weeks. But if I remain "mean", they continue "serving".

Did anyone else notice this phenomenon? Or am I a bad picker?

[Anonymous]

Easy. They want to bang and don’t want to commit. Since they are helping you, then they might expect retribution.

On the other hand, it might be they feel they are being seduced for long term.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm an attractive, kind and nice woman (deep in my heart, so I feel uncomfortable not to be reciprocal or accepting favors without giving back). I noticed that when I "use" the guy as a working horse - always ask him to do things for me, task with errands, decline dates that are not posh enough, and otherwise make him "serve" my interests they gets more and more attached. When I treat men nicely (invite over to my place to cook dinner, reciprocate with inviting them for dates etc), they quickly dump me. Like, within 2-3 weeks. But if I remain "mean", they continue "serving".

Did anyone else notice this phenomenon? Or am I a bad picker?

1. Some men like being needed
2. See it as a challenge and want your approval
3. They have mean women in their family an that’s what they are used to.

[Anonymous]

Do women like men at all, ever?

Sometimes on DCUM it’s hard to tell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Easy. They want to bang and don’t want to commit. Since they are helping you, then they might expect retribution.

On the other hand, it might be they feel they are being seduced for long term.

Not getting it: so if I show them kindness and independence by not using their time and resources they think I wouldn’t be banging them?

[Anonymous]

It’s the thrill of the hunt, they like a challenge

[Anonymous]

They had mean mommies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do women like men at all, ever?

Sometimes on DCUM it’s hard to tell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do women like men at all, ever?

Sometimes on DCUM it’s hard to tell.

Do men like women at all, ever?

[Anonymous]

I think there can be a lot of reasons. One I’ve noticed is

1.Many men like a challenge and like to feel like they’ve “won” a woman’s affection

2. Too much affection and effort at the beginning can feel smothering and like there is too much expectation too soon.

I don’t think you should cruel or mean but I can understand why some men are attracted to some aloofness and the initial challenge of winning a woman over. We want what we can’t have.

* also I know not all men and I think this is similar for lots of women

[Anonymous]

There’s a book about that

[Anonymous]

Being 90% “nice” - meaning professional timely aggressive and effective- and-
10% flat out mean

This was my secret to success in sales as a woman in finance. Payed off. Nice Al the time is easy to figure out. It’s boring and Va ills. Me. Love it when they’re not entirely sure what you might do, if they cross you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Being 90% “nice” - meaning professional timely aggressive and effective- and-
10% flat out mean

This was my secret to success in sales as a woman in finance. Payed off. Nice Al the time is easy to figure out. It’s boring and Va ills. Me. Love it when they’re not entirely sure what you might do, if they cross you.

Can you please make sense at least 10% of the time? Your post is unintelligible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do women like men at all, ever?

Sometimes on DCUM it’s hard to tell.

this is why men leave the room at family gatherings once the number of women reaches critical mass. women will talk all sorts of s*** about men, but at the end of the day, they're just as stupid/obnoxious in their own ways and keep spreading their legs for em.

[Anonymous]

They have their own trauma. When you treat them somewhat badly, it feel familiar to them and therefor is safe. If you treat them well, it's uncomfortable, because it's new. They don't know how to react or behave. Same goes for women.
I met a DA. The nicer I was to him, the faster he ran. Very, very confusing, but now I know why. So sad as they are missing out on so much good in life. The trauma is real and lasts a lifetime.