Help- 2 year old regression in table manners (ie Food throwing) :)

[Anonymous]

I thought we were doing well with eating at the table nicely but recently have had a regression where my newly 2 year old will sling his whole plate on the floor. I don't know what to do or what I did.

- Pre-18 mo he would throw food that he didnt want.

- I removed the baby seat on the Stokke high chair (as someone recommended) and it solved the problem. When he was done he is allowed to get up. I have enforced the "once you get up, you are done" rule and he was pretty good at taking him plate to the sink. For awhile he tried to sit in my lap or the floor but I held the boundary of sitting in his own chair and he seemed to be doing well.

- Was doing well for awhile. Food was staying on the table, if he didnt want it he put it on the placemat or on my plate. He would get up when he was done.

-In the past few weeks he has gotten unpredictable. Sometimes everything goes well, other times he drops things like his banana peel on the floor, clearly to see my reaction, and a few times he just wipes his whole arm across the table. I am always sitting and eating with him (im single so just the 2 of us)- which makes me think it isnt just for attention.

When he does this- I take away anything left on the table and make him (and if he doesn't guide him and his hands) to pick of the food off the floor and put it in the trash. I say "No", "Food does not go on the floor".

What is going wrong? Ideas on how to fix this? We don't go out much but I really want to a)enjoy meals at home and b)eventually be able to go out without this type of behavior.

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

You are way, way too uptight about this. There is no "regression" happening, you have a toddler being a toddler. They never had table manners to begin with. Parenthood is going to be a long journey for you if you think your kid will master skills at 18 months and be perfect from them on.

[Anonymous]

lol at 2 year old taking the plate to the sink

[Anonymous]

two year old is trying to understand cause and effect. they are literally just learning that their body makes movements that can change the world around them. i think your expectations are too high. Put a mat on the floor and this will pass as the novelty wears off.

[Anonymous]

I disagree with the previous posters and think your expectations are reasonable, as is your enforcement/learning mechanisms. Just stay consistent, he’ll learn within a week or two (with, as you’ve noted, times down the line when he’ll try it again). Kids are always going to test boundaries. As long as you’re consistent, they learn quickly.

—Mother of two preschoolers with good* table manners who took a similar approach starting at a similar age.

*still working on not talking with our mouths full

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:lol at 2 year old taking the plate to the sink

LOL seriously. If a two year old can't throw a banana peel on the floor to see his mother's reaction, who can?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the previous posters and think your expectations are reasonable, as is your enforcement/learning mechanisms. Just stay consistent, he’ll learn within a week or two (with, as you’ve noted, times down the line when he’ll try it again). Kids are always going to test boundaries. As long as you’re consistent, they learn quickly.

—Mother of two preschoolers with good* table manners who took a similar approach starting at a similar age.

*still working on not talking with our mouths full

OP here- thanks- the consistency on other things help.

To everyone else- he doesnt throw food at daycare so why can't I expect the same of him at home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the previous posters and think your expectations are reasonable, as is your enforcement/learning mechanisms. Just stay consistent, he’ll learn within a week or two (with, as you’ve noted, times down the line when he’ll try it again). Kids are always going to test boundaries. As long as you’re consistent, they learn quickly.

—Mother of two preschoolers with good* table manners who took a similar approach starting at a similar age.

*still working on not talking with our mouths full

OP here- thanks- the consistency on other things help.

To everyone else- he doesnt throw food at daycare so why can't I expect the same of him at home?

Because kids are more comfortable with parents and act differently at home then daycare...and he's probably exhausted am by dinner time after a full day of being on at daycare

[Anonymous]

It's reasonable to expect him to learn not to throw food and to have him pick it up. It's not reasonable to expect him to be a perfect robot toddler but as long as you're keeping reasonable standards for behavior and understanding that he won't be perfect, it's better to work on this kind of thing gradually when they're younger rather than introducing a new expectation suddenly at 3 or whenever.

[Anonymous]

I would sit him on the floor and tell him to eat his dinner off the floor. I would not put up with that ever.

[Anonymous]

Put only your plates on the table. Get him one that suction cups to the table. His meal is over when he throws food.

What does the daycare do when a child throws food?

[Anonymous]

Your response is correct. However, you cannot expect that it will result in perfect behavior at this age. It’s just how you control it in the moment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would sit him on the floor and tell him to eat his dinner off the floor. I would not put up with that ever.

This might actually work. It depends on the kid.