Should adult children spend the same $ on gifts as their parents?

[Anonymous]

Is it bad to give your parents a cheaper gift than what they got you now that you’re an adult with your own income? I kind of feel bad only spending like $25 on my parents while they give me $200-300 gifts, but they also have way more money than me. I’m not poor but I don’t think I can afford to spend that much on anyone except my spouse.

[Anonymous]

Your parents are likely aware of your finances and will appreciate your gift regardless of what you spent. I can't imagine a decent parent wanting their child to over extend themselves to "gift up" to parents. It would probably mean more if these gifts are well thought out and maybe sentimental vs and Amazon gift card or similar, but that goes for most gifts between close family I think. At least in mine where no one really "needs" gifts.

[Anonymous]

Give what you can afford. Your time is the greatest gift of all. Think of a memory that is special and write it in a card. Thank them. My DS wrote me a card about a time when his ice cream cone tumbled, and I hardly remembered. He remembered it well, and it was a sweet letter of thanks that I was patient with him and never made him feel bad about these little things. That I was comforting and he felt very safe. That letter means more than anything he could ever buy me.

[Anonymous]

I don’t care about gifts but live giving them. My parents never got me gifts. Do what you can as it’s the thought.

[Anonymous]

I have adult children and really don’t need an e pensive gift from them. First of all, I buy whatever I need and while they make pretty good money, they have a mortgage while I do not.

[Anonymous]

No I would not want my kids to feel they have to match me gift wise. I just appreciate them occasionally giving a gift back...not because I need anything..just be because it shows they have learned the joy of giving.

[Anonymous]

When my mom was alive each year I’d get her a monthly calendar featuring the breed of dog we used to have. She said it was a great gift because she enjoyed it all year long.

[Anonymous]

Most adults don’t really need any gifts. We usually splurge on a nice vacation somewhere warm so it’s a collective gift to all and the kids will often take us out for a meal on vacation.

They don’t want things and neither do we.

[Anonymous]

We skip gifts ..
We aren't in need of anything and neither are our adult children.

[Anonymous]

I don't want my children spending money on me. I love a heartfelt card. I would also be thrilled to celebrate my birthday with them with a cake I purchased on made. I should never be about how much money people spend.

[Anonymous]

$25 is a bit cheap, OP. That’s what I give my mail carrier. That said, if you can supplement with things that are really thoughtful or that take time to prepare, that’s a good way to boost the gift-giving. And keep your eye open for sales all year long, so you can get something more valuable for the same money. Listen carefully all year to see if they say anything that gives you ideas for gifts.

[Anonymous]

If parents are retired, give them Amazon gift cards, amount depending on your finances. No good parent wants you to uncomfortably stretch your budget.

[Anonymous]

My mom has told me to please not give her any gifts.

[Anonymous]

For me that depends on means. I got cheap gifts mostly in my 20s. Now I get them a nice, more expensive gift because we have more money.

[Anonymous]

There’s a lot of space between $25 and $200. Your weird feelings are a sign that it’s time to up your spending. I bet you can find something lovely in the $50-$75 range.