help please!!!!

[Anonymous]

I'm 35 weeks pregnant everything was ok in my marriage, but 3 weeks ago I had a feeling my husband was liying ( he plays soccer and I usually go with him to his games) about a game he was going to somewhere far where nobody knows me...he didn't want to take me and said he needed sometime alone to do his thing byhimself. I found out the address of that place and drove there he took a girl with him there it was the worst feeling ever, I got very upset and we ended up yelling in the parking lot and the girl said she just meet him it was the second time they saw each other and the worst part is that he told me in front of her that he likes her, that our marriage wasn't working anymore and that we were going to get separeted, I love him so much I really don't want to loose him. He is stil at home but he said we r going to try to be ok as friends until the our baby is born, he is not seeing that girl anymore but he said he just doesn't have anymore feelings for me

[stpickrell]

Either forgive him -- and ensure he has changed somewhat -- or see a lawyer.

Don't "forgive" him and then use it as a club to bludgeon him in every. single. disagreement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 weeks pregnant everything was ok in my marriage, but 3 weeks ago I had a feeling my husband was liying ( he plays soccer and I usually go with him to his games) about a game he was going to somewhere far where nobody knows me...he didn't want to take me and said he needed sometime alone to do his thing by himself. I found out the address of that place and drove there he took a girl with him there it was the worst feeling ever, I got very upset and we ended up yelling in the parking lot and the girl said she just meet him it was the second time they saw each other and the worst part is that he told me in front of her that he likes her, that our marriage wasn't working anymore and that we were going to get separeted, I love him so much I really don't want to loose him. He is stil at home but he said we r going to try to be ok as friends until the our baby is born, he is not seeing that girl anymore but he said he just doesn't have anymore feelings for me

-He's going to a soccer game but no one knows you there even though you usually go to the games? Does he play soccer? I'm confused. If he plays, then he teammates would know you vs some random woman...right?
-You "found out" the address of the place? I guess I can understand snooping in this instance. Own it.
-I don't understand why he's still at home. He loves you and wants to make it work or he doesn't. Why live at home "as friends" until the baby is born?

You say this started 3 weeks ago. What happened to change things? A big fight? Work troubles? Family troubles? You can't force him to have feelings for you. See if he wants to go to a marriage counselor.

[Anonymous]

www.survivinginfidelity.com

Get over there and start reading. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Good Bye Mr Asshole!

You need to figure out if you are willing to live your life with a man who cheats. If he is doing this now, just starting a family life with you, then what do you think is going to happen when you have more kids and less time for him and him for you?

He is an ass and should be slapped hard.

I suggest you tell him he has to leave, at least for a while. You need some time to yourself to clear your mind and figure out your own needs and what indeed you are willing to and want to do.

Please, do not stay with this ass just because you are pregnant.....

[Anonymous]

What a jerk!

[Anonymous]

Counseling - if nothing else, then to to figure out how you are going to manage the new baby and the responsibilities. He might be able to tell you why he is dissatisfied, but I would not promise that you can make changes to accomodate him when you have a baby on the way.

You need to do this now - so you know whether you are going forward with him or without him. Line up friends now to support you at the time of the birth and for the first month.