2 month old needs to be comforted all night

[Anonymous]

I feel insane talking to my other friends with newborns whose babies wake them up a couple times a night for feedings and then go back to sleep for a few hours. My baby will generally go down without too much of a fuss but needs to be comforted (head pats, tummy rubs, sometimes rocking) anywhere upwards of 10 times night, often multiple times an hour making any consecutive sleep impossible. Is everyone else just lying? What am I missing?

[Anonymous]

Totally normal. Are they in the same room as you?

[Anonymous]

Normal. Cosleep.

[Anonymous]

You are missing a night nurse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Totally normal. Are they in the same room as you?

DH is room sharing with her and gets me for feedings - he is able to fall back asleep quickly after comforting her. Meanwhile I can't even fall asleep in the same room as as I'm anticipating her waking up any minute, and if/when I do fall asleep and get woken up it takes me 30+ minutes to go back to sleep. I feel like such a failure because my friends all make this sound so easy.

[Anonymous]

This is normal with some kids (it was with mine). I basically hung on by my fingernails until my kids were old enough to sleep train.

I tried the "right" thing 3 times with 3 different babies and it didn't change a thing.

People always tried to comfort me that alert infants are often smart kids, so there's that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Totally normal. Are they in the same room as you?

DH is room sharing with her and gets me for feedings - he is able to fall back asleep quickly after comforting her. Meanwhile I can't even fall asleep in the same room as as I'm anticipating her waking up any minute, and if/when I do fall asleep and get woken up it takes me 30+ minutes to go back to sleep. I feel like such a failure because my friends all make this sound so easy.

No, no, no, don't feel like a failure!

Babies are not computers. It's not like if you put the right inputs in, you get the expected output (long stretches of sleep, or whatever else it is). They are people. They are quirky. They have their own desires and needs. They aren't like other babies.

It's not you. It's humanity and the way it works.

[Anonymous]

Every baby is different! Do what your child needs. Don’t compare, it is never as it seems.

[Anonymous]

You’re not a failure. My only advice would be to incorporate formula and split the night with DH. Like you take 9pm-2am and he takes 2am-7am or something like that, so you each actually get to sleep a few consecutive hours. Your milk supply will drop but my perspective as a formerly exhausted new parent was, “oh well.”

My kids are now 2 and 4 and they sleep a solid 11 hours, so know that it does get better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Totally normal. Are they in the same room as you?

DH is room sharing with her and gets me for feedings - he is able to fall back asleep quickly after comforting her. Meanwhile I can't even fall asleep in the same room as as I'm anticipating her waking up any minute, and if/when I do fall asleep and get woken up it takes me 30+ minutes to go back to sleep. I feel like such a failure because my friends all make this sound so easy.

Cosleep. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

OP after 3 months I would expect this to start calming down but at 2 months I think it's in the range of normal.

You're not a failure. Your friends may be lying but some babies are honestly easier, and it sounds like that's what your friends have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel insane talking to my other friends with newborns whose babies wake them up a couple times a night for feedings and then go back to sleep for a few hours. My baby will generally go down without too much of a fuss but needs to be comforted (head pats, tummy rubs, sometimes rocking) anywhere upwards of 10 times night, often multiple times an hour making any consecutive sleep impossible. Is everyone else just lying? What am I missing?

It's unfortunate, but normal. You can try a snoo, or co-sleep, like most of the world!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re not a failure. My only advice would be to incorporate formula and split the night with DH. Like you take 9pm-2am and he takes 2am-7am or something like that, so you each actually get to sleep a few consecutive hours. Your milk supply will drop but my perspective as a formerly exhausted new parent was, “oh well.”

My kids are now 2 and 4 and they sleep a solid 11 hours, so know that it does get better.

+1 to the split night

My baby was like this - would wake up and then stay up for an hour plus each time, multiple times a night. It's just exhausting!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is normal with some kids (it was with mine). I basically hung on by my fingernails until my kids were old enough to sleep train.

I tried the "right" thing 3 times with 3 different babies and it didn't change a thing.

People always tried to comfort me that alert infants are often smart kids, so there's that!

Theyre also not SIDS babies

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is normal with some kids (it was with mine). I basically hung on by my fingernails until my kids were old enough to sleep train.

I tried the "right" thing 3 times with 3 different babies and it didn't change a thing.

People always tried to comfort me that alert infants are often smart kids, so there's that!

Theyre also not SIDS babies

PP and good point. My oldest was later diagnosed with severe sleep apnea and I sometimes still shudder to think what might have happened if she'd been one of those very sleepy babies. But sleepy is one adjective that will never describe my kids.