Is this normal for an elderly person?

[Anonymous]

Dad is 80, fairly good health, lives alone.
He often tells me he couldn’t sleep at night and so he slept through most of the day (I am talking 2 pm or later).
He also is a fan of walking so he tries to take walks every day, but sometimes he would just wake up and then “freeze up” as he calls it and not do much - just eat and watch YouTube videos. He then complains how he is feeling low energy because he “couldn’t make himself go out for a walk”.
I just want to know if it’s normal?
My mother passed a couple years ago; she would give him errands to run and he would would try to avoid it or sneak a little walk in, not picking up the phone when she was calling him (just to give you an idea of their dynamic).
My only question is whether I need to be concerned at all.

[Anonymous]

I think I would worry a bit if this was a marked change for him, or a deviation from his normal behavior; it could reflect some depression, which isn’t uncommon in the elderly. If he seemed content, it would be less of a concern but it sounds like he is expressing some distress about the patterns of his days?

Would he be receptive to adding some structure to his day through activities at a senior center, volunteering, etc? Does he have friends who he socializes with? Had your mom managed their social life, and now he’s at loose ends? That’s pretty common with widowers.

I think you can ask him directly if he’s experiencing signs of depression. It’s common and often overlooked as “normal” in the elderly. Do you have the ability to meet your dad for walks occasionally?

[Anonymous]

Normal. I push myself on walks but sometimes like yesterday I was a slug in the house until 1:00 pm

63 year old

[Anonymous]

Yes.

[Anonymous]

OP, none of your specific are particularly concerning but what you need to be concerned about is: he's 80. That crosses an important threshold. Have a next step living plan in place.

[Anonymous]

It's normal for my mom in her 70s. She has aches and pains that make walking difficult some days. She also sleeps poorly at night and takes lots of naps.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Becoming disconnected from a night/day schedule is a sign of depression and also of cognitive decline. Not unusual at his age. But yeah it's concerning either way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, none of your specific are particularly concerning but what you need to be concerned about is: he's 80. That crosses an important threshold. Have a next step living plan in place.

Is that true?
Is 80 a big milestone.

[Anonymous]

OP here, thanks everyone, he has a friend or two and my brother and I try to talk to him often, he is quite reluctant to pursue new social activities.
I am concerned a bit about depression tbh. He will never agree to medication though, I don’t think. But I’ll definitely try to have him mention it to his PCP and see what they say.
He is in cognitive decline already, but the one that’s pretty common in even younger ppl- conspiracy theories and simplistic explanations, stereotyping, forgetting things, etc.

[Anonymous]

Sadly, I think this is a pretty common state for many elderly as they decline. I recommend finding a geriatric psychiatrist because some medications work differently for seniors or with different types of dementia and cognitive loss.

It's hard to watch, but think of it as part of the process and not necessarily something that needs to be fixed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sadly, I think this is a pretty common state for many elderly as they decline. I recommend finding a geriatric psychiatrist because some medications work differently for seniors or with different types of dementia and cognitive loss.

It's hard to watch, but think of it as part of the process and not necessarily something that needs to be fixed.

Thank you, I will try to get a referral for him!

[Anonymous]

Have a next step living plan in place.

agree

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dad is 80, fairly good health, lives alone.
He often tells me he couldn’t sleep at night and so he slept through most of the day (I am talking 2 pm or later).
He also is a fan of walking so he tries to take walks every day, but sometimes he would just wake up and then “freeze up” as he calls it and not do much - just eat and watch YouTube videos. He then complains how he is feeling low energy because he “couldn’t make himself go out for a walk”.
I just want to know if it’s normal?
My mother passed a couple years ago; she would give him errands to run and he would would try to avoid it or sneak a little walk in, not picking up the phone when she was calling him (just to give you an idea of their dynamic).
My only question is whether I need to be concerned at all.

It's normal. Look up sundowning. He's probably nearing the end of his life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dad is 80, fairly good health, lives alone.
He often tells me he couldn’t sleep at night and so he slept through most of the day (I am talking 2 pm or later).
He also is a fan of walking so he tries to take walks every day, but sometimes he would just wake up and then “freeze up” as he calls it and not do much - just eat and watch YouTube videos. He then complains how he is feeling low energy because he “couldn’t make himself go out for a walk”.
I just want to know if it’s normal?
My mother passed a couple years ago; she would give him errands to run and he would would try to avoid it or sneak a little walk in, not picking up the phone when she was calling him (just to give you an idea of their dynamic).
My only question is whether I need to be concerned at all.

It's normal. Look up sundowning. He's probably nearing the end of his life.

I thought it was about dementia!
The end of life as in how many years or months? I mean I get it that he’s 80 but he doesn’t physically look like someone about to keel over tbh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, none of your specific are particularly concerning but what you need to be concerned about is: he's 80. That crosses an important threshold. Have a next step living plan in place.

Yes I am trying to get him in home care