Yom Kippur Question

[Anonymous]

Sorry if this is a stupid question - but is there a traditional break fast meal when Yom Kippur ends and/or a religious service of any kind? We have a family member with a milestone bday on Saturday, 10/12, and we would like to plan a special dinner for them, but we don't want to do so if it will get in the way of our Jewish family members' religious observance or tradition. "Just ask them" would, in other families, be solid advice, but not applicable here! Thanks in advance!

[Anonymous]

Why can't you google this?

There is a simple dinner, usually bagels or something cold, eaten 30 minutes after the sun set on the day of Yom Kippur.

[Anonymous]

I could google it! I came here instead. It took the same amount of time, and I might just get some helpful answers. And most people probably won't be rude, since this is a message board - where people ask questions and others answer them. There's an exception to every rule, of course, as you well exemplify.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure why you can't ask them. Traditions vary, I've never heard of eating bagels after fasting, yet see the comment above.

I do think that it would be weird to combine the break-fast dinner and the birthday dinner. The purpose of the post-Yom Kippur dinner is kind of to formally conclude the fasting. I'd say move birthday dinner to Sunday?

[Anonymous]

People have different traditions for what they eat to break the fast, but many people don’t feel great after the fast and don’t want a big meal or to do anything much. I’m always exhausted and headachey and if it were my birthday (and it often is, because I have an early October birthday too!) I wouldn’t want to do anything special that night and would prefer to do it the next day, if that is a possibility for you.

[Anonymous]

My family and friends -- mostly Mid-Atlantic and Midwestern Reform and Conservative Jews -- always get together for a break fast bagel brunch. I thought everyone did that! My birthday sometimes falls on Yom Kippur, and I do not want to celebrate my birthday then.

[Anonymous]

Just goes to show - I grew up and celebrate in just the opposite way of the other posters, grew up going to a huge Break the fast gathering and now our family also goes to a rather large pot-luck break-the-fast.
Some people don't fast at all.
Definately ask what their observance is.

[Anonymous]

I would do a different night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry if this is a stupid question - but is there a traditional break fast meal when Yom Kippur ends and/or a religious service of any kind? We have a family member with a milestone bday on Saturday, 10/12, and we would like to plan a special dinner for them, but we don't want to do so if it will get in the way of our Jewish family members' religious observance or tradition. "Just ask them" would, in other families, be solid advice, but not applicable here! Thanks in advance!

Bagels!

[Anonymous]

Hi Bill, I know Saturday is YK when is a good time to celebrate your bday?

[Anonymous]

Bagels are a common choice because they don't require much prep and are ready quickly. I know one family that does blintzes. My family tradition is the Chipotle near where we go to services. I would check with your family if they want to attend, but might suggest moving it to the next day. Yom Kippur is the most serious day of the year. I usually feel pretty wrung out physically and emotionally by the end of it. I could go to a birthday party after, but it's kind of nice to go home and drink a cup of tea and relax for the evening. A birthday party the next day would be more fun.

[Anonymous]

If you are being culturally or religiously sensitive to your Jewish relatives then it would be best not to plan an event on that night. There are so many nights available. Pick another one.

[Anonymous]

The traditional break fast meal is a dairy meal. Unfortunately, it's eaten pretty late at night, since you have to wait until after sunset, and it's usually eaten pretty quickly, because everyone is so hungry and tired. People might also be grumpy from being hungry and dehydrated and not in a particularly festive mood. It might be better to have the party another night. But if you're going to have it as a break fast party at the end of Yom Kippur, then I would serve:
Plenty of fluids (water, tea/coffee, juice)
Bagels with fixings like lox, cream cheese, sliced tomatoes and cucumbers, etc
Quiche and kugels
Hard boiled or deviled eggs
Tuna salad or egg salad
Fruit and veggie tray

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My family and friends -- mostly Mid-Atlantic and Midwestern Reform and Conservative Jews -- always get together for a break fast bagel brunch. I thought everyone did that! My birthday sometimes falls on Yom Kippur, and I do not want to celebrate my birthday then.

Same. There are a few huge open-house-style break fasts in our community and it's just a question of which one(s) you got invited to. DH's birthday also sometimes falls on Yom Kippur and we always celebrate on a different day.

[Anonymous]

As a side comment, I’ve heard the reason for bagels or dairy in general is that it’s easier to digest after a fast than meat.

OP, I’m joining the chorus of “just ask them”. I personally would not want to go out or really do anything after break the fast on YK. I get super exhausted with a massive headache (thanks caffeine withdrawal!). And then there’s my older brother’s family who don’t fast at all.