Questions to ask if applying to Private School for High School

[Anonymous]

I'm passing along some questions that I wish I had asked when we were applying to private high schools. I now have a senior and regret our choice to send to private vs public. We are one family and have had one experience so I won't speak for everyone. But these are the things I wish I had known going in.

1. What are the school's college outcomes? Are they transparent about college acceptances?
2. What is average SAT for the last four years? 2020 and 2021 scores are deflated. Scores have started to rise again though nationally.
3. Ask for GPA percentage tiers. So, for example, what percentage of students have a GPA from 4.0-4.5? What % have GPA's from 3.75-4.0? Etc... This will give you an idea as to how rigorous it is and how much grade deflation occurs. Competitive public schools graduate 50% or more of their kids with GPA's higher than 4.5. So compare this information to your home public school. And remember that your student will be competing against public school kids when they apply to college. So, yes, GPA does matter. And this is where grade deflation is really hurting the private school students.
4. If they provide #3, then ask for the colleges that those tiers were accepted to.
5. What is the retake policy on tests/quizzes?

Now that I have a senior, we are finally getting this information and are seeing that the last four years of over homework and stress wasn't worth it. Our school didn't make this information available to parents prior to senior year. My DC busted their butt only to land in the middle GPA tier. DC could have gotten into these schools from a top public school by doing a whole lot less work and having a lot less stress.

If they don't share this information (which they probably won't), I'd pass. They clearly are not proud of their outcomes or stats. Push for it. Public is the way to go.

[Anonymous]

Again, if you're applying to private schools for a specific college outcome, you're delusional and kidding yourself. That's on you, not the school.

[Anonymous]

1) No school will ever tell you these things.
2) If compelled to ask, only do so after being admitted because this is a path to rejection.
3) You have no idea how your child would have fared in public - there are very strong students in many of them.
4) I 100% empathize with the excessive work and pressure at some DMV private schools
5) Along side (4) empathize with dealing with teachers who can be harsh/stingy for no good reason. (This is not saying everyone should get an A, but that it's crazy to say almost nobody will get an A)

6) Finally - Your message was geared towards your child landing with a middling GPA by senior year - but I think the bigger PSA for parents is that even for students who end up with a high GPA/high rigor profile - chances for T20 is honestly extremely limited if your child has no hook. Hooked students with lower rigor and/or lower GPA will leapfrog over the unhooked high fliers into these T20 schools (even T30 sometimes).

I think a better approach will be to decide where you think your child will thrive in HS and don't worry about college placement. Whether that be a very hard private or a less hard one or public. This happiness can also depend on what course pathway they chose in terms of rigor. And tell them up front that these other factors will come into play at the time of college applications. Balance accordingly

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Again, if you're applying to private schools for a specific college outcome, you're delusional and kidding yourself. That's on you, not the school.

I would word this differently. Families should chose private school for the community, the character development, development of critical thinking skills and the opportunity for students to gain close and meaningful relationships with teacher-mentors.

It has never occurred to me that my child would have a better college outcome because of where he attended high school. Although I wouldn't use the word delusional, I do think that parents who chose private expecting a certain college outcome are misguided.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, if you're applying to private schools for a specific college outcome, you're delusional and kidding yourself. That's on you, not the school.

I would word this differently. Families should chose private school for the community, the character development, development of critical thinking skills and the opportunity for students to gain close and meaningful relationships with teacher-mentors.

It has never occurred to me that my child would have a better college outcome because of where he attended high school. Although I wouldn't use the word delusional, I do think that parents who chose private expecting a certain college outcome are misguided.

Yes - they look at all the instagram admissions results and think their child will be one of them. Never realizing that most of the Ivy/T20 attendees from these schools had a hook. Yes - there are a few unhooked each year - but it very very small in grand scheme of things.

That said - if they went to a great school with a great education - they will take that with them and do great in college (even those with lower GPAs). Just let go of the college prestige piece....it's unhealthy for you and your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm passing along some questions that I wish I had asked when we were applying to private high schools. I now have a senior and regret our choice to send to private vs public. We are one family and have had one experience so I won't speak for everyone. But these are the things I wish I had known going in.

1. What are the school's college outcomes? Are they transparent about college acceptances?
2. What is average SAT for the last four years? 2020 and 2021 scores are deflated. Scores have started to rise again though nationally.
3. Ask for GPA percentage tiers. So, for example, what percentage of students have a GPA from 4.0-4.5? What % have GPA's from 3.75-4.0? Etc... This will give you an idea as to how rigorous it is and how much grade deflation occurs. Competitive public schools graduate 50% or more of their kids with GPA's higher than 4.5. So compare this information to your home public school. And remember that your student will be competing against public school kids when they apply to college. So, yes, GPA does matter. And this is where grade deflation is really hurting the private school students.
4. If they provide #3, then ask for the colleges that those tiers were accepted to.
5. What is the retake policy on tests/quizzes?

Now that I have a senior, we are finally getting this information and are seeing that the last four years of over homework and stress wasn't worth it. Our school didn't make this information available to parents prior to senior year. My DC busted their butt only to land in the middle GPA tier. DC could have gotten into these schools from a top public school by doing a whole lot less work and having a lot less stress.

If they don't share this information (which they probably won't), I'd pass. They clearly are not proud of their outcomes or stats. Push for it. Public is the way to go.

Nope. Not here in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm passing along some questions that I wish I had asked when we were applying to private high schools. I now have a senior and regret our choice to send to private vs public. We are one family and have had one experience so I won't speak for everyone. But these are the things I wish I had known going in.

1. What are the school's college outcomes? Are they transparent about college acceptances?
2. What is average SAT for the last four years? 2020 and 2021 scores are deflated. Scores have started to rise again though nationally.
3. Ask for GPA percentage tiers. So, for example, what percentage of students have a GPA from 4.0-4.5? What % have GPA's from 3.75-4.0? Etc... This will give you an idea as to how rigorous it is and how much grade deflation occurs. Competitive public schools graduate 50% or more of their kids with GPA's higher than 4.5. So compare this information to your home public school. And remember that your student will be competing against public school kids when they apply to college. So, yes, GPA does matter. And this is where grade deflation is really hurting the private school students.
4. If they provide #3, then ask for the colleges that those tiers were accepted to.
5. What is the retake policy on tests/quizzes?

Now that I have a senior, we are finally getting this information and are seeing that the last four years of over homework and stress wasn't worth it. Our school didn't make this information available to parents prior to senior year. My DC busted their butt only to land in the middle GPA tier. DC could have gotten into these schools from a top public school by doing a whole lot less work and having a lot less stress.

If they don't share this information (which they probably won't), I'd pass. They clearly are not proud of their outcomes or stats. Push for it. Public is the way to go.

Eyeroll. Which public are you talking about? Have you any clue what the very top of the class at the publics around here look like? Cause it is a whole lot like the top tier of our Big3. And, guess what, they are like 10 of 500 so you have to be in the top 5% PLUS the top publics are only sending like 5 kids to the fancy pants big name snot schools you are thinking about. Guess what? Your genius kid ain't in the top 5 AT ANY LOCAL TOP PUBLIC if they are in the middle of the class at Sidwell, NCS/STA, GDS or Potomac. And the middle of the class at your private is, guess what, a heck of a lot better than being in the top quartile at a local public. Do the math.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I think a better approach will be to decide where you think your child will thrive in HS and don't worry about college placement. Whether that be a very hard private or a less hard one or public. This happiness can also depend on what course pathway they chose in terms of rigor. And tell them up front that these other factors will come into play at the time of college applications. Balance accordingly

Good summation right there!

To paraphrase what another PP said - should you be in the fortunate position of having choices for HS, the best thing you can do for your kid's future college process is help them find a HS where they'll thrive. Where they actually can do their best in school because they have good friends, fun and healthy ways to spend time, etc. Trying to game a college application process that is 4+ years away based on high school choice is not something you can do with any kind of accuracy.

As an aside: admissions officers have regional reps who know the local schools well. Even if they don't know the intricacies of every single grading system, they're very aware that different schools grade very differently (including some making it borderline impossible to get a 4.0) and adjust expectations accordingly. You haven't found a workaround by going to a school that maybe grades less harshly.

[Anonymous]

Yeah this post is weird. Admissions for private schools is way better than public schools the last few years. The top privates have been getting 40-50% into Top 25 and the next tier of privates are often approaching 25%. No non-magnate public comes even close to this. But yeah if your kid is going to bottom half of the class at Sidwell they aren’t going to be to going to the top colleges. But that bottom half of the Sidwell class wouldn’t be near the top at a public or even somewhere like Bullis (where the top layer is very strong too). The problem is parents in the bottom half of the class at Sidwell or GDS way overrate the strength of their kid because of the school association.

[Anonymous]

You need to want private school because of the actual education and experience *while in high school* not because of some perceived benefit for college placement. That was true maybe 20 years ago, but is no longer accurate for most. If your primary focus is GPA and college placement then yes, private school might not be the way to go.

[Anonymous]

If you are about college admissions you should be in the market for a school where your kid will be near the top. Don’t send them to GDS if they are going to be middle of the class.

[Anonymous]

Why are we complaining about grade deflation instead of grade inflation?!? Make no sense.
Of course. Though now DC can go Ivy and join a remedial class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to want private school because of the actual education and experience *while in high school* not because of some perceived benefit for college placement. That was true maybe 20 years ago, but is no longer accurate for most. If your primary focus is GPA and college placement then yes, private school might not be the way to go.

Couldn't agree more. Pick the school that's right for your kid where they are now. Not as some path to a particular college you have them going to in your mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to want private school because of the actual education and experience *while in high school* not because of some perceived benefit for college placement. That was true maybe 20 years ago, but is no longer accurate for most. If your primary focus is GPA and college placement then yes, private school might not be the way to go.

Mostly agree, but I do think there is a benefit to college placement indirectly if your child is unhappy or poorly served at their current school, and a move to a private school could address those issues. On balance, being at a HS where they can excel (whatever enables that) is more of a bonus that being at a HS with a recognizable name or higher GPAs.

I also don't think the name or type of school was that important 20 years ago either. I went a hyper-competitive NE boarding school, and the college results today are pretty similar to when I went there. But I don't think it's the school's reputation as much as the fact that it's competitive to get in there in the first place. That school can screen for 9th graders who are self-sufficient, test well, etc. and then you just see that reflected in the college matriculation four years later.

[Anonymous]

Ask how they handle differentiation (both directions, faster and slower)

Ask if any student can register for and take any Honors, Advanced, or AP class they want to take. Ask if school or faculty need to approve those classes.

Ask if there are any mandatory after school activities (athletic team, other).

Ask which optional clubs or activities exist.

Ask what a typical course sequence looks like. Most schools have an informal science progression, for example. (At my school, it was Envi Sci in 9th, Bio, Chem, then Physics in 12th.)