Did your 3 year old want to start preschool?
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Anonymous
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My child recently turned 3 and I’ve been thinking we’d start preschool later this fall or next spring. She is adamant she doesn’t want to go, and she wants to stay home (with nanny, baby, and work from home mom and dad). Do other 3 year olds show more enthusiasm for preschool? She was at an in home daycare a year ago for a few months and didn’t like it.
We have the option to do just 1 or 2 days a week (3 hours a day) at a place that’s more like daycare with other 3 year olds and then transition her to a real preschool. That’s probably a bad idea since it’ll mean another transition, right? The preschool is only 3 hours a day, 3 days a week. |
Anonymous
| No. I forced him at 4 and I regret it to this day. |
Anonymous
Well you’re weird because 4 is the literal latest you start preschool. OP be the parent, your kid probably also doesn’t want to eat broccoli. The earlier you start with even a few hours a week the easier the K transition will be. I wouldn’t transition between pre-k 3 and 4 if you can help it though. |
Anonymous
| Both my kids were very excited to go and loved it. Some of this is in the kid's personality, some of it is in the message they get from parents both explicit and subconscious. |
Anonymous
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We're in DC so pk3 was full day, coming from staying home since birth with Granny as her only caretaker. I was so nervous to start her, and she certainly did not want to go. But we talked it up, attended the "pre-preschool playground meetups", and put on a happy face at dropoff.
By pickup on day one she was just a ball of excitement about her new teachers and her friends and telling us all about carpet time and the different stations in their classroom. It's a big adjustment and I think it would be strange for a 2/3 year old to be like "yes, I want to do this thing I've never heard of instead of what I'm used to doing", but in my experience the teachers are lovely and it's a great experience. |
Anonymous
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My kid was pretty nervous about it. We started her at 3.5 in DCPS preschool. It was a bit of an adjustment at first but she was running into the room without saying goodbye by Thanksgiving.
I’m not sure she would’ve been as happy or as ready before then. But by 3.5, we felt that we and her nanny were just not giving her enough to do/helping her with independence and expanding her social skills. She definitely had to learn to share and be more independent compared to kids who had been in group care since much younger, for instance. It helped that we were doing true preschool, on the school year calendar, and so we just told her that she was starting school in the fall. We didn’t give her a choice; it’s just what was expected. (And she had also seen neighbors go off to the same school.) I think giving a choice might be a mistake at this age; just make a decision and go with it. |
Anonymous
| Mine was excited to go at 2.5! |
Anonymous
| My son had a great time in preschool. So many drawings and art projects, he loved music class and making friends his age. Some separation anxiety is normal at 2 or 3, but they get over it quickly. |
Anonymous
| Just show her a couple of the Daniel Tiger first day of school episodes to get her excited about it. We always called it "school" even though it's glorified daycare but DD feels very proud of going to "school" like a big kid. |
Anonymous
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It’s one thing to listen to your child when they’re in school and to try to sort out separation problems from more serious resistance.
But it’s stilly to ask a three year old about something important, unfamiliar and scary. Mine would say she didn’t want to go to an ice cream store if she was scared about it. |
Anonymous
| You are the parent. My kids learned so much in pre school. K teachers can usually tell who has never been in a classroom before. |
Anonymous
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Does she have opportunities to interact with other kids around her age - e.g., does nanny take her to the playground or any classes? If so, I wouldn’t push preschool right now. Especially if you would plan to switch schools soon.
That being said, my youngest was afraid to start preschool when he was close to turning 4. He cried at bedtime the week leading up to his first day, saying he wanted to stay with me. He actually adjusted really well to school and quickly grew to love it. So, I also wouldn’t let her apprehension be your deciding factor, because it could change. |
Anonymous
I don't understand why you would be talking with a kid about this before a decision is made. That's just going to reinforce the anxiety. Generally the fewer days, the harder it is on the kid, and the more transitions, the harder it is on the kid. Drop the subject completely for a few weeks or months until you find a place. Then when you bring it up again, don't present it as "would you like?". Present it as "great news, you get to!" |
Anonymous
| I agree it’s not a good idea to consult a little kid on this when they have never been before and can’t have an informed opinion. We simply told mine she was starting at 3 and off she went. She was nervous and there were tears at first, but she accepted the routine and liked it very quickly. We never asked her if she wanted to go. It’s an easy transition because going to preschool is expected for kids this age so most shows, books, and songs talk about it so it feels normal for your kid to go. I think it would have been harder NOT to go and explain to my child why all her books talked about this fun place called preschool that she never got to go to. |
Anonymous
| Both mh kids were excited, but I know just as many kids who were nervous and worried. Huge range of normal - what’s important is it isn’t your kid’s call to make. |