Do men love their kids?

[Anonymous]

Do men love their kids? Like truly love their kids or do they just take care of them out of obligation?

[Anonymous]

dumb

[Anonymous]

Yes. They love their kids.

Proof: #girldad

Men would not invent that whole schtick out of obligation.

[Anonymous]

In this hypothetical, every man in the universe is exactly the same? They don’t have different personalities or values?

[Anonymous]

Not the way a mother does.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s a different kind of love.

I rarely see men who truly try to improve as a parent and not make the mistakes their parents did. It’s more that they try their best, and if their kid gets messed up, they don’t worry about it.

Sort of like romantic relationships. Women are generally the ones who read relationship books and take responsibility for monitoring how the relationship is going. Men rarely do that.

Also far less guilt and shame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a different kind of love.

I rarely see men who truly try to improve as a parent and not make the mistakes their parents did. It’s more that they try their best, and if their kid gets messed up, they don’t worry about it.

Sort of like romantic relationships. Women are generally the ones who read relationship books and take responsibility for monitoring how the relationship is going. Men rarely do that.

Also far less guilt and shame.

You are dumb and narrow minded

[Anonymous]

Do women wear lipstick?

This is a ridiculous question. There is a range from indifferent to abusive to adoring with many steps between. There is not a blanket definition of how all men feel towards their children.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I ask this because all the men that I know spend very little time with their kids. They provide financially but make very little effort to spend time with their kids or parent. It seems like many men love the idea of a family but don’t actually want to be an active parent.

I remember watching Jimmy Kimmel and the dad’s couldn’t even get their kid’s birthday’s right. The mom’s knew all the answer’s

[Anonymous]

Obviously not all men.

My ex loves our kids in his way. His way is unhealthy in that he sees them as ways to validate him. He doesn’t love them for who they are, he isn’t able or willing to sacrifice for them, but he sure does love to take credit for their accomplishments that they did in spite of him, not because of him.

[Anonymous]

Come with my husband and I to our Compassionate Friends Meeting and listen to the fathers (including my husband) who have lost their children. You have no idea of the level of men's grief when their children die and their attachment to their children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I ask this because all the men that I know spend very little time with their kids. They provide financially but make very little effort to spend time with their kids or parent. It seems like many men love the idea of a family but don’t actually want to be an active parent.

I remember watching Jimmy Kimmel and the dad’s couldn’t even get their kid’s birthday’s right. The mom’s knew all the answer’s

I think that people with similar values often group together.

My husband loves our kids very much. He spends as much time with them as I do, and is very much an active parent. His friends are also active parents, one my husband’s closest friends is a fellow dad that he met at the playground when the kids were toddlers. I think that people tend to group themselves with others that share similar values, and that includes valuing being a good parent.

[Anonymous]

I would say for myself, and all my male friends, our kids are the most important thing in our lives. The relationship is often different from the mother’s, but no less strong.

[Anonymous]

I’ve often wondered something similar but for a different reason. I would never leave my kids and move out to go live somewhere else. Men do it ALL the time, women much less frequently. It’s not that I think they don’t love their kids, I just literally can’t comprehend how they can do it.

My dad did it, my own husband did it (left his kids with his ex). I just wouldn’t.

[Anonymous]

Yes, men love their children.

But not in the same way as women. Men's priority is the woman with whom they are sleeping. If that relationship ends (widowed, divorced), they will prioritize finding a new woman to sleep with, and it is very clear that finding and establishing this new relationship comes before their existing children.

Men seem to struggle with maintaining their relationship with children when the children's mother disappears.