He belongs to a private club

[Anonymous]

He spends a lot of time at least 3x a week at a private club where I am not a member. I will not ever be a member. He texts me photos sometimes.

He talks about it a lot.

I am not jealous. I don't begrudge him.

However, I don't see us ever marrying each other. If we are in a long term relationship, I am wondering how this will play out.

[Anonymous]

So what are you looking for from us here?

[Anonymous]

So you don't think a person should have any interests outside of spending time with you?

How is this a problem? Or any different from a million other hobbies people have?

[Anonymous]

What type of private club?

[Anonymous]

Is it a sex club?

[Anonymous]

Private club as in “gentleman’s club”? Obviously he doesn’t want you there.

[Anonymous]

Why won’t you ever be a member?

[Anonymous]

How couldn't you be a member if you get married? Is it a men's club?

[Anonymous]

I mean the obvious answer is to end things because you don't see you guys working out. Which is fine. Is this a guys only thing? DH belonged to a private club when he met (though only went once a week or so) but he would bring me too.

[Anonymous]

Who cares?

[Anonymous]

What is with the vaguebooking on DCUM lately? This and the "he told me to put on a tinfoil hat" poster need to learn how to write an OP.

Private club is = Country club? Gentleman's club? Capitol Hill Club?

Come on, OP.

[Anonymous]

Before we had ladies' clubs and gentlemen's clubs, and people used to have lunch and spend time there with their friends. Some of these places had bedrooms so people who went into the city on business wouldn't have to get a "strange" hotel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How couldn't you be a member if you get married? Is it a men's club?

We are over 50. Neither of us want to re-marry.

I am asking, what would you do?

How do you think this will play out long-term?

Let's say, five years from now. We are living together. Not married.

He still belongs to the club. I don't.

Let's just say it's a swimming pool and tennis and racquetball club.

[Anonymous]

Depends - is it a BDSM club or a golf club?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How couldn't you be a member if you get married? Is it a men's club?

We are over 50. Neither of us want to re-marry.

I am asking, what would you do?

How do you think this will play out long-term?

Let's say, five years from now. We are living together. Not married.

He still belongs to the club. I don't.

Let's just say it's a swimming pool and tennis and racquetball club.

Why wouldn't you join? Who doesn't like swimming and tennis?