Are high school graduation parties before a kid heads off to college a tacky money grab?

[Anonymous]

Backyard party, some food catering and sodas, invite everyone you can think of and they're expected to pop by and leave $100-500 in a card. Rubs me the wrong way.

[Anonymous]

Either you're imagining that you are expected to give that sort of money, or you're socializing with the wrong people, OP.

[Anonymous]

You're imagining the money expectation and then resenting them for it. Buy a copy of "Oh the places you'll go" or a sweatshirt for the kid's college and give them a card.

Or don't go, since you hate them and don't want to celebrate a milestone. You won't be missed.

[Anonymous]

No. They are a celebration of having accomplished completing one thing and a goodbye before heading off to college, generally in my circles.

[Anonymous]

Definitely a gift grab. Also there are parties co hosted by multiple families and a designated gift row or tables for each graduate. Usually just boxes where you can slip your card + gift card. What weddings receptions have become too.

[Anonymous]

My daughter didn’t have one but was invited to several. They were fun- she gave 25 dollar gift cards which is way cheaper than hosting. OP if you aren’t happy about it don’t go

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Either you're imagining that you are expected to give that sort of money, or you're socializing with the wrong people, OP.

We and the kids are invited to these things for kids and families we barely know, kids my kids never hang out with, which sure seems like a money grab.

[Anonymous]

We had a party and no one gave anywhere near $100. The range was $0-$60, iirc. Kids were mostly about $20 but plenty brought little to nothing. Which is totally fine.

[Anonymous]

The money grabbers are the ones who host (especially for multiple kids) but don’t go to other people’s parties and don’t give any gift.

[Anonymous]

well in some ways it is. But it's a money grab that I am happy to attend for a student I feel a connection with. Otherwise, I don't attend and don't hold any judgment towards those who do.

And no, my kid did not have one when he graduated even though people have asked and they sent him $ anyway.

[Anonymous]

We had grad party with 100 kids. Most brought nothing, and we did not expect anything. Kid was not upset about not getting anything and was just happy to say goodbye to their friends.

[Anonymous]

HS grad parties are low class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either you're imagining that you are expected to give that sort of money, or you're socializing with the wrong people, OP.

We and the kids are invited to these things for kids and families we barely know, kids my kids never hang out with, which sure seems like a money grab.

So just don't go - no big deal. Some people have a "the more, the merrier" attitude towards parties. Clearly, you don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had a party and no one gave anywhere near $100. The range was $0-$60, iirc. Kids were mostly about $20 but plenty brought little to nothing. Which is totally fine.

In our town these are social, and only adults bring $. Seniors don't give each other $. It is a party for them to hang with each other. My DH and I are going to only one this year, for a K-12 friend.

[Anonymous]

Different question—do people invite both family and their kids friends? My grad says no one does this and it would be super weird. Do people have two parties?