Have you retired recently?

[Anonymous]

I did…and am surprised how unmotivated I am. I get up at a good time, but then go into my phone or turn on TV. I do my chores and medical appointments but I am not really exploring new things or tackling accumulated projects at home. This is not what I envisioned.

Should I cut myself slack for now…or draft up some very structured schedule?

[Anonymous]

Guessing you've spent your entire life in a very structured way: school, working, child care, and more working. For the first time in your life, you have very few 'have tos'. This is a huge adjustment.

Cut yourself some slack, spend time thinking about what you want to do, and don't focus on the 'shoulds'. Try out new activities. It may take a while to create your new life structure. And that's ok.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s one thing if you retired a year ago then maybe you could start doing something but if it was this year, you are fine. Just start actually doing something like take a walk each day, schedule a lunch date, go to a movie.

[Anonymous]

Yes, OP, I am currently in the exact same situation. I thought I would accomplish all the little household projects I put off, but so far I have not. I think it's a period of decompression after decades of work and stress. Also, it's summer. I'm trying to just let myself enjoy this time and maybe later I'll be more productive.

[Anonymous]

It took me 4 years to create a new life/schedule post retirement. The first 2 years I did a lot of nothing, though I did walk/exercise a lot. I was just so burned out from work, it took me a long time to recharge, much longer than I expected. Year three I tried lots of different activities/hobbies that I thought I would like and weeded out most. Year 4 is new-found activities, friends and experiences. Give yourself time.

[Anonymous]

It like when you have a baby and think you will shower and put on full makeup by 9am. You have to ease into it.

[Anonymous]

OP here—it has only been about 2 months, so it sounds like this pattern might be normal.

Thanks for the wisdom from those who have been there/done that!

[Anonymous]

PS-I did take a great celebratory trip and have started reading the New York Times everyday (something I did not have time for when working)!

[Anonymous]

Me too. I get nothing done. I did go for a walk three times yesterday, but this doing nothing is getting to me.
I'm 46, so there's this constant questioning if it's too early. Most of my friends will be working another 15+ years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Me too. I get nothing done. I did go for a walk three times yesterday, but this doing nothing is getting to me.
I'm 46, so there's this constant questioning if it's too early. Most of my friends will be working another 15+ years.

Interesting.
Negative motivated you to retire so young?

I have read there are phases to retirement. The first one you feel like you are on vacation. The second you become a little disappointed by the lack of structure and purpose . Third you explore what would make a satisfying focus. Fourth (if you are lucky) is when you have found that thing and are relishing it.

[Anonymous]

I retired young too. It took me two full years to adjust to making my own schedule, after decades of structure. I’m still working on it! I make a weekly checklist that incorporates exercise, projects, music practice, pro bono work, and fun. So far, so good, but I might like a bit more intellectual challenge.

[Anonymous]

I retired young thinking I’d fill my time with hobbies, travel, exercise…. But instead I just surf the web on my phone & nap. I realize now that retiring was a terrible mistake for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I retired young thinking I’d fill my time with hobbies, travel, exercise…. But instead I just surf the web on my phone & nap. I realize now that retiring was a terrible mistake for me.

I do what you do, adding TV to the mix! 😱