Share your positive coming out story

[Anonymous]

My daughter's best friend (M) is planning on coming out to his parents this week. He's 16 and just a great kid, he's been "practicing" on our family and I can tell how nervous he is. I wanted to share with him some positive stories (social media seems to be nothing but heart breaking stories of disowning kids). I know his parents well, and I think they will be accepting (I mean, honestly - I'm sure they already know) but he is worried.

Any positive stories (especially if you came out in your teen years!)

Thank you

[Anonymous]

Awwww, poor kid. My immediate circle has a lot of positive coming out stories — I never did it formally, just started casually dropping same gender pronouns when talking about the possibility of a significant other and my family rolled with it — but even in the most accepting environments, it can be scary.

I have a friend who came out to his parents as bisexual around 15/16. Some background: he had always been a flamboyant theater kid who totally stood out pushed gender norms in our small town and his parents were politically active in progressive social causes — if you’d asked me without knowing his feelings, I would have said duh of course his parents would be supportive and while they might not have guessed bisexual, I have to believe they knew he was queer of some kind. Nonetheless — he was petrified. After all, he loved his parents and couldn’t bare the idea that they would be upset at him. Fortunately, it went well and he’s now happily married, flamboyantly queer, and has a great relationship with his parents.

Another friend was worried to tell her parents that she was a lesbian — her mom is Chinese and she didn’t think that side of the family winds be accepting, but her mom very nearly had a career as a professional ballerina before settling to chemistry so she was actually lovely and was able to understand a bit more of what my friend was going through that she original thought would be the case.

Hope things go well for him!

[Anonymous]

Thank you for your story!

[Anonymous]

DS (17y) came out a couple of years ago. "XXX (boy) and I are dating." "Great! He is such a nice kid. Hope you are happy!"

DS's BFF since childhood came out to her mom a couple of years ago. Nothing but love and acceptance.

In my neighborhood mom group, there are 2 non-binary kids, one tranboy, 1 lesbian, and 2 bi kids. All with very accepting parents/friends/schools/communities.

I came out 30+ years ago - different time. My friends were great. My parents, not so much so, but came around and now are doting grandparents to our kids.

See the Olvia Colman clip from Heartstopper for a lovely coming out moment.

[Anonymous]

When I came out to my mother, her first words were "so long as he's Jewish"

[Anonymous]

My brother came out shortly after college. He had moved in with his college roommate from junior year. While they had started as roommates, it progressed to boyfriends by the end of the year but they still called each other roommates. My parents hugged my brother, said they loved him and loved his boyfriend, and then grumbled that they both owed me $50 because I'd called it their senior year when his (now husband) came home with him for Christmas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My brother came out shortly after college. He had moved in with his college roommate from junior year. While they had started as roommates, it progressed to boyfriends by the end of the year but they still called each other roommates. My parents hugged my brother, said they loved him and loved his boyfriend, and then grumbled that they both owed me $50 because I'd called it their senior year when his (now husband) came home with him for Christmas.

I'll add that my brother was worried a little about coming out to my dad. My dad was born in the 40s in a small farming town. He was never homophobic but did make comments that he didn't realize were not PC. He was also your stereotypical sports dad who had coached my brother's teams from T-ball to Babe Ruth. My brother wasn't worried my dad would stop loving him or disown him, but worried he'd have a hard time accepting it. My dad sobbed happy tears at the wedding.