Recommendations on where to live between Bethesda, MD & Arlington VA

Kintsugi
Member Offline
Hi all! We are going to be moving to the area in July/August from Hampton Roads VA area and need some advice on where to live that won't cause intense commuting stress for my wife and I. I will be working near the Bethesda Metro Station and she will likely be at Kenmore Middle School in Arlington, VA. We also have 1 small and 1 large-ish dog.
I am not from the area (originally from Boston so understand there will be traffic and such) but am trying to figure out a good location that will not be too strenuous or too long of a commute for me going to Bethesda. (I need to be in office 3 days a week and work from.home 2 days) Any recommendations on areas to live? Ideally a place with a backyard but will consider a really dog-friendly complex too. Ideally 3000-4200/mo
Thank you!!

EDIT:
** My wife needs to stay working In Virginia for retirement reasons. She is a doctoral level counselor and has been in the Virginia retirement system for quite a while and it would not be a sound idea to start all over. The Bethesda job is a once in a blue moon type of job so this is where we are... We did want to move to Northern Virginia at some point because the salaries are higher and her retirement is based on her top 5 years so we thought this was going to work out in the long run.
Anonymous
Budget?
Kintsugi
Member Offline
Thanks -- forgot to include that. 3000-4200/mo
Anonymous
How often will each of you need to go into your respective workplaces? Do you prefer DC or a suburb?
Anonymous
Is there a reason your wife is getting a job in Arlington vs Montgomery County? If your job is definitely in Bethesda your lives would be much easier if she also got a job in Montgomery County and you live nearby.
Anonymous
While by miles the commute seems short, Bethesda to Arlington in rush hour is not fun. Maybe the Cabin John, MD would be a good spot since you can go over the Key Bridge. The issue will be your budget. I don’t know VA well so I can’t make any recommendations on the other side of the river unfortunately.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:While by miles the commute seems short, Bethesda to Arlington in rush hour is not fun. Maybe the Cabin John, MD would be a good spot since you can go over the Key Bridge. The issue will be your budget. I don’t know VA well so I can’t make any recommendations on the other side of the river unfortunately.


Should have said she.
Anonymous
Driving is what causes commuting stress. It's inherently dangerous, it's tough to face bad weather conditions, etc.

Car commuting that involves bridges is to be avoided in my opinion.

I would recommend that you live on the Metro line in Virginia and you take Metro to work in Bethesda. Of there's any chance you will have kids, you probably will have a daycare near home and kids. With your dogs, you probably want to minimize home alone timw. With your wife's teaching schedule, she will probably be first home so makes sense to shorten her commute.

For anyone who might find fault with an asymmetrical rather than split commute, this is how my husband and I structured our lives outside the DMV. I willingly signed up for more household chores and kid wrangling in exchange for less time in the car. We also considered that I am a night owl and my husband is an early bird. He does better at managing a 1 hour commute in the AM because he is more awake. Our traffic chokepoint was a particular highway intersection. By buying a house to the east of it, we lowered the sum of our commutes by 20 minutes.

I agree with the person who said you would be better off working in the same county/general area.

If someone has a clever suggestion for a DC neighborhood, it might be along the Metro Red Line. If you get a suggestion like that, consider it seriously. Perhaps you could get by with only one car which would save $$$$.
Anonymous
She needs to have a real good reason NOT to work in Montgomery County Public Schools/near Bethesda. She should have at least tried..
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:She needs to have a real good reason NOT to work in Montgomery County Public Schools/near Bethesda. She should have at least tried..


I agree. I'm a teacher in Arlington and I know Montgomery schools have major issues but so does APS. I have no idea what could possibly be so special about Kenmore that would justify a substantial commute not just for one spouse but for two.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:She needs to have a real good reason NOT to work in Montgomery County Public Schools/near Bethesda. She should have at least tried..


I agree. I'm a teacher in Arlington and I know Montgomery schools have major issues but so does APS. I have no idea what could possibly be so special about Kenmore that would justify a substantial commute not just for one spouse but for two.


What are you talking about? One spouse has a job in Arlington and the other has a job near Bethesda and OP is trying to figure out a reasonable compromise on where to live. The Kenmore wife isn't complicating this for the husband - they have complicated things for one another by having jobs in different states. Not sure why you're blaming this on one spouse sheesh everybody calm down please. (Also, Kenmore is pretty good school and the facilities are nice.)
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:She needs to have a real good reason NOT to work in Montgomery County Public Schools/near Bethesda. She should have at least tried..


I agree. I'm a teacher in Arlington and I know Montgomery schools have major issues but so does APS. I have no idea what could possibly be so special about Kenmore that would justify a substantial commute not just for one spouse but for two.


What are you talking about? One spouse has a job in Arlington and the other has a job near Bethesda and OP is trying to figure out a reasonable compromise on where to live. The Kenmore wife isn't complicating this for the husband - they have complicated things for one another by having jobs in different states. Not sure why you're blaming this on one spouse sheesh everybody calm down please. (Also, Kenmore is pretty good school and the facilities are nice.)


We’re assuming that the Bethesda job is somewhat unique and that the spouse who works in education could just as easily find a job in Montgomery County. It’s not a dig on Kenmore, just a statement that there are also middle schools in MD that would make their living and commuting arrangements much easier. OP and their partner are from out of town and don’t realize how terrible the cross river commute can be.
Anonymous
I just want to make a general comment. If someone is on the road by 7:30, it can make a huge difference in commute. I don't think going over the bridge is a uniquely bad commute. The roads are just busy here. If you are traveling within the beltway around rush hour, there is just going to be traffic. If someone can leave between 7 or 7:30, that can help a lot.
Kintsugi
Member Offline
[



Yes this is true. I just edited my original post. I should have clarified that she needs to work on Virginia for retirement reasons and yes the Bethesda job is a very rare position for me.
Anonymous
Try the Palisades section of DC or the Bethesda communities off MacArthur Blvd. I live in Bethesda near River Road and going down MacArthur to Chain Bridge to Arlington is a doable commute.
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