If you're retired with no kids at home . . .
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Anonymous
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What do you do all day? This is related to several other posts (needing friends, empty nest posts) but I'm really dreading this. And I have always worked and had hobbies outside my family. I've traveled without them. But those were always in limited hours available and, when retired, I'll have years (hopefully) of all day with nothing much to do. I can see me feeling depressed and isolated quickly.
I'm trying to research meetups and groups but not finding that process to be very easy. What did you do /are you doing for social outlets, keeping busy, etc.? |
Anonymous
| This is not me but my mom volunteers three days a week, between that and her hobbies she seems plenty busy! |
Anonymous
What sort of volunteering & hobbies? Does she have a social group at all?? |
Anonymous
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My parents wisely picked up friends in their late 50s. So when they retired a decade later, they had friends ready.
You’re wise to think of this now! |
Anonymous
| DH and I go for a morning walk with our dog and a neighbor couple and their dog. Same in the evenings unless one of us has plans. We go to matinees - both plays and movies. We each volunteer twice a week and are on a couple of boards. I go to a yoga class 3-4 times a week. I'm in a book club. DH is in a pool club - he and some friends go to shoot pool once a week. He's currently mentoring a little boy who doesn't have a father - the boy was over yesterday morning and they were playing chess when I left the house. We travel - both long weekends and multi-week trips. We take classes at the JCC. We took an Italian class for 18 months and then went to Italy for a month. So we find ways to stay busy. |
Anonymous
| If you can't be happy during an endless weekend -- don't yet retire! |
Anonymous
| I say, congratulations, but I am a SN mom who would view this as a huge success…so maybe not what you were looking for. |
Anonymous
I'm not yet. I have a few years but I'm empty nest more immediately. So will already have more time on my hands. And I have that even now and I'm struggling. I thrive more with doing things, people around. Loneliness is hand-in-hand with depression for me. |
Anonymous
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I’m not retired yet but thinking about it. Being that you are asking now, I think start really giving thought and making plans. Have you ever wanted to go back to school, then do that? Look into what volunteer organizations are around. Do you like exercising, then plans couple of days around an exercise class. Take a day for errands, grocery shopping, cleaning the house, maybe a day every other week for nails and massages. Does your local library have a book club? Do you have a friend group, then make a weekly lunch date.
If you have children, were there any activities you really enjoyed with them? One of my thoughts is to start a Girl Scout troop? That will take up a ton of time. I know a mom that worked in her girls’ schools office answering phones. She’s still doing it in retirement. Another volunteers at her church running the clothes closet. Just some ideas. |
Anonymous
| Could you work part time as a contractor in whatever your specialty is? That is my current plan. |
Anonymous
No, let someone else who needs it have that job. You will find hobbies and meet people. |
Anonymous
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I’ll answer for my parents/stepparents, realizing some may be non-applicable:
- take care of their own parents (in their 90s) - bought a multi-family investment property that they have enjoyed renovating and acting as a landlord for - got a dog for the first time - gardening - Learning to cook (better) — my dad probably tries 5-8 new recipes a week - going on long walks and to the gym frequently - more vacations, weekend trips and day trips to sightsee - now that I have kids, travel to see them but it sounds like you have some time before grandkids are in the picture |
Anonymous
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My parents volunteer at the animal shelter twice a week. My mom substitutes as an instructional assistant at the elementary school up the street. Dad builds wooden toys (doll cradles and trucks) for the toy drive with a bunch of retired engineers. Mom cooks for her mom and hosts dinner twice a week. Dad rides his bike in the "old geezers club" Saturday mornings too.
Both have found lots of interests, seemingly. |
Anonymous
| I just answered for my parents but I’ll add that when I am an empty nester, I look forward to getting my yoga teacher certification and also buying a beach rental property |
Anonymous
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What I saw with my parents...
Dad was on two golf teams and spent a lot of time on house projects Mom went to an exercise class 3x a week and made a friend through that who she'd get together with for lunches etc. Regular trips to the library. Reads a lot. She's always been a homebody, happy with 1-2 friends. Once my sister (who lives nearby) had kids, she spent a lot of time helping with them. DH is now retired while I'm still working FT. He does volunteer tutoring a couple times a week. Long dog walks. Home repair projects. Some handyman work at our church. Plays a lot of videogames. He doesn't really have local friends of his own but he's also like my mom, never seemed like he wanted a big social group. We'll often see friends on the weekend (where I'm friends with the wife and he likes the husband well enough but would never initiate a guys-only activity). |