HELP! DW is an addict

[Anonymous]

She is not addicted to drugs, or food, or alcohol.
She is addicted to Target!
I cannot keep that woman out of Target, and it is nearly Mission Impossible to get her out of there. I swear , it has gotten to the point where we take two cars because I know that inevitably she will meet 30 people she knows and converse with all of them at length as the children and I slowly age and stand around like mutants as they catch up on the past 5 years where they haven't seen each other, talked to each other, or thought about each other. Meeting at Target, however, immediately triggers a seemingly irresistible desire to discuss in agonizing detail all of the minutiae of the last half decade. Ice cream melts, meat goes to room temperature, and I go to the bathroom to have a shave since my beard has grown out since we got to Target.
I even think they rig the traffic lights at Targets to change to reed on main arteries more quickly and let the side street greens go long so females can stare at the store and eventually succumb to its siren song
Also, ladies (and maybe some gentleman), don't come home FROM Target, or anywhere else, and say "Guess how much I saved?"
Once you SPEND money, you aren't SAVING it. The two things are axiomatically mutually exclusive- you cannot spend and save.
Any other Target addicts?

[Anonymous]

OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

[Anonymous]

Where do you live in which she can run into 30 people she knows?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

C'mon. It was funny.

I can't stand my target runs and didn't realize some people enjoy these.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

C'mon. It was funny.

I can't stand my target runs and didn't realize some people enjoy these.

Do you live under a rock? There are millions of Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, Facebook, you name it videos about how much people love target.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

C'mon. It was funny.

I can't stand my target runs and didn't realize some people enjoy these.

You just sound unhinged, OP. Take a cold shower.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

C'mon. It was funny.

I can't stand my target runs and didn't realize some people enjoy these.

No, OP thought he was funny, but he's actually hostile and mean, and if I were his wife, I'd go just about anywhere to spend time with friendlier humans.

Even if it meant hiding out doing invisible labor that benefited my ingrate spouse with humor honed during a past life as a cruise ship comedian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

C'mon. It was funny.

I can't stand my target runs and didn't realize some people enjoy these.

Do you live under a rock? There are millions of Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, Facebook, you name it videos about how much people love target.

Get off of the social media platforms. Get a hobby. Try visiting your local library or going for a walk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

C'mon. It was funny.

I can't stand my target runs and didn't realize some people enjoy these.

No, OP thought he was funny, but he's actually hostile and mean, and if I were his wife, I'd go just about anywhere to spend time with friendlier humans.

Even if it meant hiding out doing invisible labor that benefited my ingrate spouse with humor honed during a past life as a cruise ship comedian.

You sound like a party! I doubt you will have to worry about a husband

[Anonymous]

Stop going to Target with this woman. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

I am enjoying the OP's meltdown, so thanks for that, at least.

Your wife is a saint.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am enjoying the OP's meltdown, so thanks for that, at least.

Your wife is a saint.

She is. You have no idea.

[Anonymous]

I’m a woman and I enjoyed the OP’s screed. Target does act as a black hole for certain people. They get sucked in and god knows if you’ll ever see them again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, call a therapist. You need a real life human being to unload on. Maybe if they are billing per hour, you’ll learn to speak more succinctly.

C'mon. It was funny.

I can't stand my target runs and didn't realize some people enjoy these.

Do you live under a rock? There are millions of Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, Facebook, you name it videos about how much people love target.

Get off of the social media platforms. Get a hobby. Try visiting your local library or going for a walk.

The irony! 😂

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she’s desperate to talk to anyone outside of her household. I can’t imagine why.