What to do for distant friend at end of cancer?

[Anonymous]

A family friend from when I was a child (decades ago) is now dying from cancer.

We've been in occasional touch over the years. Other family members (who were adults then) have been in a little more touch over the years.

What can I do to give a bit of comfort and support?

My friend lives overseas in Europe now.

[Anonymous]

Send a care package (soft blanket, book, snacks) and a heartfelt note. Maybe some pics of you two together?

[Anonymous]

Flowers and a note expressing what their friendship meant to you as a child -- and how you remember it now.

[Anonymous]

Do it sooner rather than later -- you never know what the timing will be. Overseas mail can take a while so I'd get a card in the mail asap. Or an email if you have that email address.

Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good. Express your feelings now, while you can, about what their friendship in childhood meant to you.

A college friend died recently and I wasn't in the loop enough to know it was happening. I'd seen him just a few months previously at a reunion but obviously he wasn't talking about the cancer at that point (and apparently he was on an experimental treatment that subsequently failed and he went downhill quickly). We'd had such a great time at the reunion reconnecting over our kids' shared experiences, and his death took me by total surprise. I wish I'd had the opportunity even to email or text him and tell him how meaningful that reconnecting had been and how much he brought to my college experience many years ago. But it was too late.