Wife doesn’t like answer

[Anonymous]

I will take on contacting people for various reason. Or reach out based on discussions we have had.

Then every day, five times a day she will ask questions regardless of me giving her all of the information I have.

I can’t make people call me back, I can’t help that the person called back with questions that I gave them answers too. I also have a job and can’t spend all day dealing with one issue.

She acts as though I am inept. Or if we don’t get answer right away it is all doom and gloom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will take on contacting people for various reason. Or reach out based on discussions we have had.

Then every day, five times a day she will ask questions regardless of me giving her all of the information I have.

I can’t make people call me back, I can’t help that the person called back with questions that I gave them answers too. I also have a job and can’t spend all day dealing with one issue.

She acts as though I am inept. Or if we don’t get answer right away it is all doom and gloom.

You sound like my DH!

OP she is just making idle conversation. She is musing about what Joe and Fran will say when you invite them to a weekend event with you. If they can go, then we will do this. If they say they can’t go, then what are our next steps?

She’s not looking for a real response. It’s just chit chat.

[Anonymous]

What is the actual topic you are “calling around” for?

I have a spouse who shouldn’t call repairmen we’ll get quoted a big run up price.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will take on contacting people for various reason. Or reach out based on discussions we have had.

Then every day, five times a day she will ask questions regardless of me giving her all of the information I have.

I can’t make people call me back, I can’t help that the person called back with questions that I gave them answers too. I also have a job and can’t spend all day dealing with one issue.

She acts as though I am inept. Or if we don’t get answer right away it is all doom and gloom.

You both should share a joint email account.

You draft the questions and include photos or whatever, you each add to email request or questions, then send it.

Record of memory.

[Anonymous]

What...

[Anonymous]

Is this an emergency? Call 911. they respond.

[Anonymous]

Have you been incompetent or inept before when handling things?

[Anonymous]

Seems incompetent at posting or even describing a situation so I’d be alarmed too if they were calling anyone on my behalf.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seems incompetent at posting or even describing a situation so I’d be alarmed too if they were calling anyone on my behalf.

I accidently posted before I was done typing. Just noticed when I cam back to finish.

Talking bigger stuff like currently in the process of buying a new boat. Broker that has it has been less than responsive. Finally got ahold of someone that was supposed to send information I asked for. Detailed pictures and video of specific things that weren't clear on general listing. They sent some information but not everything. Reached back out slow to respond. Had our surveyor drive by the marina (in FL) on our behalf to make sure it was a real listing. He tried to inquire with staff. Sales guy with broker was out on another boat with a customer. Broker supposed to get back to me or surveyor over the weekend. Nothing from broker as of noon, so I called and sent them another email.

Then this afternoon wife texts me about twice, answered both text with the information I had. Then this evening she is angry with me saying that she doesn't understand why this is so hard and at this rate we will not have it by end of summer. She isn't saying this in a sarcastic way, it is clearly directed at me inferring that it is my fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seems incompetent at posting or even describing a situation so I’d be alarmed too if they were calling anyone on my behalf.

I accidently posted before I was done typing. Just noticed when I cam back to finish.

Talking bigger stuff like currently in the process of buying a new boat. Broker that has it has been less than responsive. Finally got ahold of someone that was supposed to send information I asked for. Detailed pictures and video of specific things that weren't clear on general listing. They sent some information but not everything. Reached back out slow to respond. Had our surveyor drive by the marina (in FL) on our behalf to make sure it was a real listing. He tried to inquire with staff. Sales guy with broker was out on another boat with a customer. Broker supposed to get back to me or surveyor over the weekend. Nothing from broker as of noon, so I called and sent them another email.

Then this afternoon wife texts me about twice, answered both text with the information I had. Then this evening she is angry with me saying that she doesn't understand why this is so hard and at this rate we will not have it by end of summer. She isn't saying this in a sarcastic way, it is clearly directed at me inferring that it is my fault.

Great. Tell her to handle it if she will do such a better job.

[Anonymous]

Why isn’t your wife handling this?
It infuriates me when someone says “I can’t make them call back”. While it’s true, it’s also lazy, we’ve all had to push for what we wanted and needed so that phrase really means “I just don’t care, I’m just saying it in a nicer way”.
I also think women are better at this, we have to do it with ourselves, our kids, our husbands, we just seem to need to do it more I’ve noticed so we learn how to do it.
I’d have your wife handle things and when she can’t, she’ll tell you. We had a vendor that didn’t like women. We wanted the service, I knew the problem, the vendor when talking with me gave me different answers than what he gave my husband. I then realized the owner who was also the guy I was talking to wouldn’t be the one coming out so I had my husband make an appointment and the tech came out and all was well.
We also had an issue with our cleaners that I was able to handle an issue with our cleaners better than my husband. Plus, I didn’t like the refund he got or how he wanted to handle it. He wanted to wait until morning, I wanted a picture of what they broke sent to them as soon as I realized they broke it. I also wanted to know the price of the repair whereas he just guessed at a price which was low anyway, not that I’ve supported a high price, that would be unethical, I just wanted the correct price of the repair and I had that within minutes.

I’d say break out the tasks. If you take better pictures, take them and send to your wife to talk to people. If she is the better talker, she’ll get what needs to be done happening. If she can’t talk because she’s dealing with a turkey, you get the person needed to come out, the product shipped, whatever it is.
Also, keep your differences out of it. My husband thought I was overreacting, turns out I wasn’t, the cleaners initially tried to blame my son who was with me at ball practice. Had I waited too long, I’d not have remembered where he was at. My husband also is more religious than I am. He told me I needed to thank God this was our only problem. He was right, but as I told him “I need to document this problem with time time stamps, then I’ll deal with God” and I meant it, I did need to document the problem and I did say a prayer of thanks… after the cleaner had gotten those pictures along with what happened.
I still had to spend an hour on the phone talking with the boss, but at least she literally had the picture and as I told her “I know where my son was last evening, and so does his coach. I’m going to court if you don’t refund the entire cleaning and I have pictures of what was broken, I have video footage of your crew when they were here and when they left, and I have video footage of my son and I leaving and my son and I coming back.. you will loose in small claims court and I am happy to take you there”. I meant every word and the boss decided that yes, she’d really like to refund us.
Husband is great, he just doesn’t have that skill set. He views threatening to sue as not nice, I view it as a means to resolve a problem when the only language someone speaks is legal. I also know that if I make the threat I need to follow through and I always have what I need before I make that statement. I’m not mean or out for money, I just won’t be treated badly by a vendor.
Why isn’t your wife handling this?
It infuriates me when someone says “I can’t make them call back”. While it’s true, it’s also lazy, we’ve all had to push for what we wanted and needed so that phrase really means “I just don’t care, I’m just saying it in a nicer way”.
I also think women are better at this, we have to do it with ourselves, our kids, our husbands, we just seem to need to do it more I’ve noticed so we learn how to do it.
I’d have your wife handle things and when she can’t, she’ll tell you. We had a vendor that didn’t like women. We wanted the service, I knew the problem, the vendor when talking with me gave me different answers than what he gave my husband. I then realized the owner who was also the guy I was talking to wouldn’t be the one coming out so I had my husband make an appointment and the tech came out and all was well.
We also had an issue with our cleaners that I was able to handle an issue with our cleaners better than my husband. Plus, I didn’t like the refund he got or how he wanted to handle it. He wanted to wait until morning, I wanted a picture of what they broke sent to them as soon as I realized they broke it. I also wanted to know the price of the repair whereas he just guessed at a price which was low anyway, not that I’ve supported a high price, that would be unethical, I just wanted the correct price of the repair and I had that within minutes.

I’d say break out the tasks. If you take better pictures, take them and send to your wife to talk to people. If she is the better talker, she’ll get what needs to be done happening. If she can’t talk because she’s dealing with a turkey, you get the person needed to come out, the product shipped, whatever it is.
Also, keep your differences out of it. My husband thought I was overreacting, turns out I wasn’t, the cleaners initially tried to blame my son who was with me at ball practice. Had I waited too long, I’d not have remembered where he was at. My husband also is more religious than I am. He told me I needed to thank God this was our only problem. He was right, but as I told him “I need to document this problem with time time stamps, then I’ll deal with God” and I meant it, I did need to document the problem and I did say a prayer of thanks… after the cleaner had gotten those pictures along with what happened.
I still had to spend an hour on the phone talking with the boss, but at least she literally had the picture and as I told her “I know where my son was last evening, and so does his coach. I’m going to court if you don’t refund the entire cleaning and I have pictures of what was broken, I have video footage of your crew when they were here and when they left, and I have video footage of my son and I leaving and my son and I coming back.. you will loose in small claims court and I am happy to take you there”. I meant every word and the boss decided that yes, she’d really like to refund us.
Husband is great, he just doesn’t have that skill set. He views threatening to sue as not nice, I view it as a means to resolve a problem when the only language someone speaks is legal. I also know that if I make the threat I need to follow through and I always have what I need before I make that statement. I’m not mean or out for money, I just won’t be treated badly by a vendor.

[Anonymous]

She sounds like my abusive husband. Nothing is ever good enough. I have to make all the calls and then I’ve either never asked the right follow up questions. I should’ve said such and such. Why didn’t I tell them this ..,, on and on. Why doesn’t he just make the calls since I obviously never ever get it right !?!?!?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Why isn’t your wife handling this?
It infuriates me when someone says “I can’t make them call back”. While it’s true, it’s also lazy, we’ve all had to push for what we wanted and needed so that phrase really means “I just don’t care, I’m just saying it in a nicer way”.
I also think women are better at this, we have to do it with ourselves, our kids, our husbands, we just seem to need to do it more I’ve noticed so we learn how to do it.
I’d have your wife handle things and when she can’t, she’ll tell you. We had a vendor that didn’t like women. We wanted the service, I knew the problem, the vendor when talking with me gave me different answers than what he gave my husband. I then realized the owner who was also the guy I was talking to wouldn’t be the one coming out so I had my husband make an appointment and the tech came out and all was well.
We also had an issue with our cleaners that I was able to handle an issue with our cleaners better than my husband. Plus, I didn’t like the refund he got or how he wanted to handle it. He wanted to wait until morning, I wanted a picture of what they broke sent to them as soon as I realized they broke it. I also wanted to know the price of the repair whereas he just guessed at a price which was low anyway, not that I’ve supported a high price, that would be unethical, I just wanted the correct price of the repair and I had that within minutes.

I’d say break out the tasks. If you take better pictures, take them and send to your wife to talk to people. If she is the better talker, she’ll get what needs to be done happening. If she can’t talk because she’s dealing with a turkey, you get the person needed to come out, the product shipped, whatever it is.
Also, keep your differences out of it. My husband thought I was overreacting, turns out I wasn’t, the cleaners initially tried to blame my son who was with me at ball practice. Had I waited too long, I’d not have remembered where he was at. My husband also is more religious than I am. He told me I needed to thank God this was our only problem. He was right, but as I told him “I need to document this problem with time time stamps, then I’ll deal with God” and I meant it, I did need to document the problem and I did say a prayer of thanks… after the cleaner had gotten those pictures along with what happened.
I still had to spend an hour on the phone talking with the boss, but at least she literally had the picture and as I told her “I know where my son was last evening, and so does his coach. I’m going to court if you don’t refund the entire cleaning and I have pictures of what was broken, I have video footage of your crew when they were here and when they left, and I have video footage of my son and I leaving and my son and I coming back.. you will loose in small claims court and I am happy to take you there”. I meant every word and the boss decided that yes, she’d really like to refund us.
Husband is great, he just doesn’t have that skill set. He views threatening to sue as not nice, I view it as a means to resolve a problem when the only language someone speaks is legal. I also know that if I make the threat I need to follow through and I always have what I need before I make that statement. I’m not mean or out for money, I just won’t be treated badly by a vendor.
Why isn’t your wife handling this?
It infuriates me when someone says “I can’t make them call back”. While it’s true, it’s also lazy, we’ve all had to push for what we wanted and needed so that phrase really means “I just don’t care, I’m just saying it in a nicer way”.
I also think women are better at this, we have to do it with ourselves, our kids, our husbands, we just seem to need to do it more I’ve noticed so we learn how to do it.
I’d have your wife handle things and when she can’t, she’ll tell you. We had a vendor that didn’t like women. We wanted the service, I knew the problem, the vendor when talking with me gave me different answers than what he gave my husband. I then realized the owner who was also the guy I was talking to wouldn’t be the one coming out so I had my husband make an appointment and the tech came out and all was well.
We also had an issue with our cleaners that I was able to handle an issue with our cleaners better than my husband. Plus, I didn’t like the refund he got or how he wanted to handle it. He wanted to wait until morning, I wanted a picture of what they broke sent to them as soon as I realized they broke it. I also wanted to know the price of the repair whereas he just guessed at a price which was low anyway, not that I’ve supported a high price, that would be unethical, I just wanted the correct price of the repair and I had that within minutes.

I’d say break out the tasks. If you take better pictures, take them and send to your wife to talk to people. If she is the better talker, she’ll get what needs to be done happening. If she can’t talk because she’s dealing with a turkey, you get the person needed to come out, the product shipped, whatever it is.
Also, keep your differences out of it. My husband thought I was overreacting, turns out I wasn’t, the cleaners initially tried to blame my son who was with me at ball practice. Had I waited too long, I’d not have remembered where he was at. My husband also is more religious than I am. He told me I needed to thank God this was our only problem. He was right, but as I told him “I need to document this problem with time time stamps, then I’ll deal with God” and I meant it, I did need to document the problem and I did say a prayer of thanks… after the cleaner had gotten those pictures along with what happened.
I still had to spend an hour on the phone talking with the boss, but at least she literally had the picture and as I told her “I know where my son was last evening, and so does his coach. I’m going to court if you don’t refund the entire cleaning and I have pictures of what was broken, I have video footage of your crew when they were here and when they left, and I have video footage of my son and I leaving and my son and I coming back.. you will loose in small claims court and I am happy to take you there”. I meant every word and the boss decided that yes, she’d really like to refund us.
Husband is great, he just doesn’t have that skill set. He views threatening to sue as not nice, I view it as a means to resolve a problem when the only language someone speaks is legal. I also know that if I make the threat I need to follow through and I always have what I need before I make that statement. I’m not mean or out for money, I just won’t be treated badly by a vendor.

Yikes.

[Anonymous]

She has sky high anxiety and probably doesn't see it and/or blames you for not having all the answers despite her anxiety coming up with new questions

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Why isn’t your wife handling this?
It infuriates me when someone says “I can’t make them call back”. While it’s true, it’s also lazy, we’ve all had to push for what we wanted and needed so that phrase really means “I just don’t care, I’m just saying it in a nicer way”.
I also think women are better at this, we have to do it with ourselves, our kids, our husbands, we just seem to need to do it more I’ve noticed so we learn how to do it.
I’d have your wife handle things and when she can’t, she’ll tell you. We had a vendor that didn’t like women. We wanted the service, I knew the problem, the vendor when talking with me gave me different answers than what he gave my husband. I then realized the owner who was also the guy I was talking to wouldn’t be the one coming out so I had my husband make an appointment and the tech came out and all was well.
We also had an issue with our cleaners that I was able to handle an issue with our cleaners better than my husband. Plus, I didn’t like the refund he got or how he wanted to handle it. He wanted to wait until morning, I wanted a picture of what they broke sent to them as soon as I realized they broke it. I also wanted to know the price of the repair whereas he just guessed at a price which was low anyway, not that I’ve supported a high price, that would be unethical, I just wanted the correct price of the repair and I had that within minutes.

I’d say break out the tasks. If you take better pictures, take them and send to your wife to talk to people. If she is the better talker, she’ll get what needs to be done happening. If she can’t talk because she’s dealing with a turkey, you get the person needed to come out, the product shipped, whatever it is.
Also, keep your differences out of it. My husband thought I was overreacting, turns out I wasn’t, the cleaners initially tried to blame my son who was with me at ball practice. Had I waited too long, I’d not have remembered where he was at. My husband also is more religious than I am. He told me I needed to thank God this was our only problem. He was right, but as I told him “I need to document this problem with time time stamps, then I’ll deal with God” and I meant it, I did need to document the problem and I did say a prayer of thanks… after the cleaner had gotten those pictures along with what happened.
I still had to spend an hour on the phone talking with the boss, but at least she literally had the picture and as I told her “I know where my son was last evening, and so does his coach. I’m going to court if you don’t refund the entire cleaning and I have pictures of what was broken, I have video footage of your crew when they were here and when they left, and I have video footage of my son and I leaving and my son and I coming back.. you will loose in small claims court and I am happy to take you there”. I meant every word and the boss decided that yes, she’d really like to refund us.
Husband is great, he just doesn’t have that skill set. He views threatening to sue as not nice, I view it as a means to resolve a problem when the only language someone speaks is legal. I also know that if I make the threat I need to follow through and I always have what I need before I make that statement. I’m not mean or out for money, I just won’t be treated badly by a vendor.
Why isn’t your wife handling this?
It infuriates me when someone says “I can’t make them call back”. While it’s true, it’s also lazy, we’ve all had to push for what we wanted and needed so that phrase really means “I just don’t care, I’m just saying it in a nicer way”.
I also think women are better at this, we have to do it with ourselves, our kids, our husbands, we just seem to need to do it more I’ve noticed so we learn how to do it.
I’d have your wife handle things and when she can’t, she’ll tell you. We had a vendor that didn’t like women. We wanted the service, I knew the problem, the vendor when talking with me gave me different answers than what he gave my husband. I then realized the owner who was also the guy I was talking to wouldn’t be the one coming out so I had my husband make an appointment and the tech came out and all was well.
We also had an issue with our cleaners that I was able to handle an issue with our cleaners better than my husband. Plus, I didn’t like the refund he got or how he wanted to handle it. He wanted to wait until morning, I wanted a picture of what they broke sent to them as soon as I realized they broke it. I also wanted to know the price of the repair whereas he just guessed at a price which was low anyway, not that I’ve supported a high price, that would be unethical, I just wanted the correct price of the repair and I had that within minutes.

I’d say break out the tasks. If you take better pictures, take them and send to your wife to talk to people. If she is the better talker, she’ll get what needs to be done happening. If she can’t talk because she’s dealing with a turkey, you get the person needed to come out, the product shipped, whatever it is.
Also, keep your differences out of it. My husband thought I was overreacting, turns out I wasn’t, the cleaners initially tried to blame my son who was with me at ball practice. Had I waited too long, I’d not have remembered where he was at. My husband also is more religious than I am. He told me I needed to thank God this was our only problem. He was right, but as I told him “I need to document this problem with time time stamps, then I’ll deal with God” and I meant it, I did need to document the problem and I did say a prayer of thanks… after the cleaner had gotten those pictures along with what happened.
I still had to spend an hour on the phone talking with the boss, but at least she literally had the picture and as I told her “I know where my son was last evening, and so does his coach. I’m going to court if you don’t refund the entire cleaning and I have pictures of what was broken, I have video footage of your crew when they were here and when they left, and I have video footage of my son and I leaving and my son and I coming back.. you will loose in small claims court and I am happy to take you there”. I meant every word and the boss decided that yes, she’d really like to refund us.
Husband is great, he just doesn’t have that skill set. He views threatening to sue as not nice, I view it as a means to resolve a problem when the only language someone speaks is legal. I also know that if I make the threat I need to follow through and I always have what I need before I make that statement. I’m not mean or out for money, I just won’t be treated badly by a vendor.

I really hate to say this but I feel bad for your family and people that have to deal with you, though I suspect it's a point of pride for you