We don’t do a lot of screens at home and don’t own video games. DS is often visiting friends and cousins houses and they all have handhelds. In this kind of situation - either as the host who has games or as the guest parent- do you let the kids play whatever they want or do you make them have some outside time or no screen play?
I’m of two minds about this. I don’t want to limit DS’s time with other kids, but I don’t want him playing video games and watching TV for 1 hour + weekdays and all day on Saturdays. |
I struggle with this. To us the upside of having playdates is so that they're more inclined to play with each other than be on the screen. But sometimes parents drop off their kids with tablets in tow and then our kids beg for their ipads too. In those cases we set a time limit and then make them all go outside. When they're visiting other ppl's houses we tend to relax the rules and try to go with the flow and norm at the house, but I do ask that they limit the game time to 1 hour. |
We don't do playdates with screens at our house. If our kid goes to a playdate at someone else's house, they follow their rules. |
+1 If I go through the effort of organizing and hosting a playdate, kids are going to play, not stare at a screen. If someone else is hosting, my kids can follow their house rules. |
When I’m the host, kids *generally* are expected to play screen free. Exception is if it’s a particularly long play date and the kids aren’t getting along well or something similar, I might let them watch TV, which the other parent knows.
Play dates at the house where the kid has an iPad and no time limits are occasional. Visits with older cousins are only a few times a year and there are no screen limits then and a fair amount of video games and movies. |
We don’t allow it at others |
I don't allow it at our place and I have told parents upfront to not send ipads. Yes, some kids sneak in phones but I imagine playing on a phone isn't that fun.
My kid's group of 5-6 friends follows similar rules but I know he's not invited to some other homes with very free for all screen policies, and I wonder if it is because those parents know my rules. |
My daughter had 2 rules for playdates were “no iPad or tv” and “stay out of master bedroom”. As she got older, she and her friends made dancing videos on the iPad. My son was too OCD to play Legos with friends so his play dates were mainly to play video games. That is primarily why he’’d want friends over…. to play the 2-person games that he couldn’t play alone. |
Same here. If a kid walks into our house with a handheld game I tell them "we don't use those here - you can leave that right here and I'll remind you to pick it up when you're leaving." It's never been a problem. |
Some loons responding on this thread I guess not many playdates happen |
What if kids being iPads to your house? My son is 11 and if I ask his friends to put away their iPads I know they will be super respectful and comply but I wonder if it will make them not want to come over. For context, it’s about an hour of outdoor play, half an hour of basement play, and then screens come out for about an hour and then they all head outside again. Thoughts? |
Over time these kids will decide they don’t want to come to your house you won’t even notice, just that they will always be busy when your kid invites them over. |
Rarely.
On the occasions they do, I made clear to my kid in advance that it can only happen for the last 20-30 minutes. |
If my kid goes to a playdate and the tv's blaring or the other child is glued to their ipad, my kid won't go back. |
DP. That's fine with me b/c my kid wants to play and that kid wants to sit on my couch playing his game alone. Wasn't much of a playdate anyway. |