The most annoying/ridiculous things about raising a baby/toddler in 2024?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is a very strong emphasis on safe sleep and car seats -- e.g. people being afraid to front face before 4, not being ok with baby sleeping even in strollers or swings.
I've seen pushback on some of these from non-American moms in international online moms' forums.

My 2000 and 2002 babies slept in the car seat every night for the first few months. Pediatrician approved! She said lots of baby sleep better with their head elevated.

[Anonymous]

The most annoying thing is people ascribing a gender to their baby based solely on their perceived biological sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The most annoying thing is people ascribing a gender to their baby based solely on their perceived biological sex.

Go away.

[Anonymous]

My 2000 and 2002 babies slept in the car seat every night for the first few months. Pediatrician approved! She said lots of baby sleep better with their head elevated.

Same with my 2012! She slept like a dream and travel was so easy - we always had her bed with us My 2014 baby slept in a Rock N Play because the car seat wasn't "safe" anymore. (And of course the irony is that Rock N Plays were then recalled).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow this thread feels foreign to me and I had a baby in 2020. Honestly I was completely isolated from other parents. Because of COVID I had zero exposure to other Moms.

I've been infertile since then so no post-COVID Mom experiences.

You still have your 2020 baby, no? You know no current moms?

[Anonymous]

I had my kids two decades ago. In my friend group, we all did what we thought was best for us. No one commented on how we fed our babies, how they slept, whether we worked or stayed at home, etc. We all had very good experiences from newborn stage through graduation. None of us are wealthy, so there were no housekeepers, night nurses or nannies. We just supported each other. I hate the competitive parenting I see today. I think it passes anxiety on to the children. We are all still friends and our kids turned out fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had my kids two decades ago. In my friend group, we all did what we thought was best for us. No one commented on how we fed our babies, how they slept, whether we worked or stayed at home, etc. We all had very good experiences from newborn stage through graduation. None of us are wealthy, so there were no housekeepers, night nurses or nannies. We just supported each other. I hate the competitive parenting I see today. I think it passes anxiety on to the children. We are all still friends and our kids turned out fine.

So, I have a 5, 2 and 1 year old and sense the competitiveness right away all the time with other parents. How can we combat this? I want to make other mom friends but folks' guards go up so fast and I swear we're nice folks. I don't want to pass the anxiety off to my kiddos either. Any advice? I know we're all just crazy busy but there's gotta be something to make it better b/c I feel like every family unit is just trying to do it alone (and better!) but I don't think that works in the long run.

[Anonymous]

All the stuff and activities. Keep it simple. Play with your kids, spend time with them, sing with them, laugh with them, and engage with them. No need for art classes, music classes, sports, etc. Do it yourself. It goes by so fast. Enjoy your time with them.

[Anonymous]

ANXIETY. So many hard and fast rules about everything the minute you pop a kid out, all driven by anxiety and fear. "We will never do X because I read an article about [bad thing happening during X]." On some level healthy parenting requires you to just go with the flow and make decisions as they work for your family but some people are so nutty about everything, and it's exhausting.

[Anonymous]

I have four kids born in 2015, 2018, 2021, and 2023. Hands down, the weirdest change has been the way the term "pregnant people" has almost totally replaced "pregnant women" on health websites and medical resource. When I googled pregnancy stuff and ended up on WebMD or Healthline, etc., for the first two pregnancies "pregnant women" was the default then it flip flopped by 2023. Feels very Orwellian to me.

Also, I don't get the popularity of Miss Rachel. I find her voice extremely annoying.

[Anonymous]

I have a child born in 2021. The solid starts and Dr. Becky stuff is super annoying. But most of the parents I've been exposed to have been pretty laid back and supportive. Not sure why...it could be self-selective? All working moms just trying to make it work. I'm in upper NW.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have four kids born in 2015, 2018, 2021, and 2023. Hands down, the weirdest change has been the way the term "pregnant people" has almost totally replaced "pregnant women" on health websites and medical resource. When I googled pregnancy stuff and ended up on WebMD or Healthline, etc., for the first two pregnancies "pregnant women" was the default then it flip flopped by 2023. Feels very Orwellian to me.

Also, I don't get the popularity of Miss Rachel. I find her voice extremely annoying.

Thanks for bringing up “pregnant people.” I absolutely hate it. It feels dehumanizing to me.

[Anonymous]

Kids born in 2017 and 2020. The only thing I relate to on this thread is the rise in instagram parent influencers that have a very singular vision of the one right way to parent your kid. I follow Dr. Becky and actually have learned a lot of great techniques from her, and her posts have made me more empathetic to my kids (especially re-examining toddler tantrums). But the not-imposing-consequences thing (or only using "natural consequences") is truly not realistic after age 5 or so. My 7 year old would basically never brush his teeth if I did that - and I am certainly not paying the dental bills for those "natural consequences!"

Re: the trans stuff (cis woman here) - I have never heard someone use the term "chestfeeding" in real life, ever. But it baffles me - even biological men also have breasts! Male breast cancer is a thing! But "pregnant people" doesn't bother me at all, despite the fact that I also rarely hear anyone use that term. I am in fact a person; I don't need someone to mention my gender to feel validated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The most annoying thing is people ascribing a gender to their baby based solely on their perceived biological sex.

The most annoying this is people confusing gender and sex, and saying things like "assigned male at birth". No dummy, that's biology.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:• Instagram reels highlighting some counter cultural way to raise kids as a way to become an influencer seem to have replaced Facebook groups.
• a new parents group I was in through the hospital I delivered at had a large emphasis on the term “chest feeding” and reminding all participants that “mom” is an outdated and potentially hurtful term. (Honestly I’m pretty open minded but this group was too much for me)

+1. All the “chest-feeding” and “birthing parent” was enough for me to go “huh maybe those TERFs are on to something.”

Same. I am totally fine if someone who is trans uses those terms to refer to themselves, but the expectation that we are going to get rid of words like "mom" or "breastfeeding" to accommodate a teeny, tiny minority is insane. Especially because becoming a mom is still a challenging transition for many/most women and we still have a ton of misogyny around motherhood that women have to navigate, and not being able to use gendered terms to describe what is, for 99.9% of the population, a highly gendered experience, is ridiculous. I am happy to support trans people in ways that don't require me to erase/subsume my own gender and identity, especially when talking about deeply personal things involving my experience as a mom.

The point is not that no one should use terms like "pregnant persons," "birthing parent," or "chest-feeding." But forcing me to use them when I self-identify as a woman and mother with breasts is not okay. I don't have to change my own identity in order to validate someone else's identity. I can keep my identity while saying "and your identity is also a-ok with me" and that should be enough.

+a million

+a million more. this is very well put PP