teen has decided to be vegan

[Anonymous]

When my daughter was about 15 she decided to go vegan for a time. It was stressful because DH and one son were huge meat eaters and other DS and I were vegetarian so I was already making 2 meals many nights (served beef or chicken to DH and DS1 about 3-4x week). DS2 and I had no desire to eat vegan. But I wanted to respect DD’s choice so I made an attempt to cook some vegan dishes. Mostly they went uneaten by all, even by her because she wasn’t only vegan but a vegan who wouldn’t touch a mushroom or salad. No matter what I tried my tofu attempts were a complete fail. We ended up eating a lot of pasta, Mexican and chili since they could be customized. I kept some frozen vegan entrees in the freezer too. After we went on a vacation and she found it incredibly difficult to stick to a completely vegan diet, she became a vegetarian which made life much simpler. The vegan stage was a lot of work.

Years later we do lots of bowls (copycat Cava) for dinner. This is easy to customize for a variety of diets and a quick meal. It would work well with a vegan. I serve rice, hummus, a variety of roasted veggies, feta (can be left out), broken pita chips, and leftover chicken (or Perdue shortcuts) for the carnivores. I wish I’d thought of it all those years ago.

I do agree about vegan sometimes being a cover for an ED. DD initially went vegan with a friend who was supposed to be in recovery from ED.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't mean to offend the vegans out there, but this is really inconvenient for our household. I cook a lot and I like to eat dinner as a family. I have no problem cooking vegetarian, but I feel like she just took a bunch of family favorite dishes off the menu. Sorry, just needed to vent.

Be a parent OP. In what other ways does this kid run the household?

[Anonymous]

When I was a kid at 12 I decided to be a vegetarian. My mother never made vegetarian meals (except when guests came over- she would make me something different to impress them, thinking that she always did that). So, instead I ate the sides and made myself a main dish if I wanted one.

I’ve been a vegetarian for 33 years.

[Anonymous]

In my family, I'm the only vegetarian in family of determined meat-eaters. I don't have time to cook two different meals, so I try to cook ahead of time and prep meals for several days. That way, even though we aren't eating the same things, we can eat at the same time. It's not a rule that everyone has to have the same food.

[Anonymous]

I would not accommodate this. It is way too disruptive to family dinners to cook entirely without dairy and eggs. Way more so than just working around meat for a vegetarian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not accommodate this. It is way too disruptive to family dinners to cook entirely without dairy and eggs. Way more so than just working around meat for a vegetarian.

It’s depressing how many completely lazy parents are responding here. Learn some new recipes FFS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not accommodate this. It is way too disruptive to family dinners to cook entirely without dairy and eggs. Way more so than just working around meat for a vegetarian.

It’s depressing how many completely lazy parents are responding here. Learn some new recipes FFS.

It’s not a matter of learning “some” new recipes. DH and I did 2 weeks in Jan without meat or dairy (except for butter). We survived and a couple of the recipes were good and we use them still. But cooking without any eggs or dairy for every meal for 1 person - no way. If your whole family is vegan then fine of course. But supper is not a “home restaurant” experience in my house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I know this is maybe not fair, but I also worry that for some teens, the restrictive nature of veganism can be a component of (or lead to) disordered eating. To be clear, I'm not saying that is true for all or most vegans. Just that the restrictive nature of the diet has some parallels.

This is absolutely true & something to keep in mind / watch out for.

[Anonymous]

I am so sorry OP. We had a family member turn vegan in college. They just hosted a milestone birthday party and forced a vegan meal on all the attendees. Inedible and a large portion of the attendees were on keto.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not accommodate this. It is way too disruptive to family dinners to cook entirely without dairy and eggs. Way more so than just working around meat for a vegetarian.

It’s depressing how many completely lazy parents are responding here. Learn some new recipes FFS.

It’s not a matter of learning “some” new recipes. DH and I did 2 weeks in Jan without meat or dairy (except for butter). We survived and a couple of the recipes were good and we use them still. But cooking without any eggs or dairy for every meal for 1 person - no way. If your whole family is vegan then fine of course. But supper is not a “home restaurant” experience in my house.

Did it ever occur to you that there is not a requirement to make meals that DO contain eggs and dairy for all but one person? Maybe try vegan meals for the whole family!

Seriously, not trying to convert anyone but there is absolutely no requirement to eat animal products, and certainly not at EVERY meal. So again, learn some new recipes (that the whole family can enjoy) and support your children’s ethics and health.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am so sorry OP. We had a family member turn vegan in college. They just hosted a milestone birthday party and forced a vegan meal on all the attendees. Inedible and a large portion of the attendees were on keto.

This is ridiculously dramatic, I hope you are a troll. Also, keto is stupid.

[Anonymous]

I have a similar story to a previous poster--I went vegan in high school and had a family who was very much non-vegan (several cherished family recipes with meat, also very Catholic parents who viewed the implied attitude towards animals as not exactly in line with their world view). My parents were very different than me in many important ways but nevertheless my mom really made an effort to learn recipes that were vegan and started cooking vegan. I think it went a long way in terms of making me feel like they really cared about me despite our many differences. I'm a little biased as I am still vegan myself but I think I would say the same about any weird dietary choice or lifestyle choice--if you can support it and not make your kid feel like an outsider for it, you won't regret the extra effort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I know this is maybe not fair, but I also worry that for some teens, the restrictive nature of veganism can be a component of (or lead to) disordered eating. To be clear, I'm not saying that is true for all or most vegans. Just that the restrictive nature of the diet has some parallels.

Hi OP!

Agree. There is a major health risk here. Could you get one of her pediatricians to help talk her out of this?

Hopefully this is just a silly phase she will grow out of soon. Hang in there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not accommodate this. It is way too disruptive to family dinners to cook entirely without dairy and eggs. Way more so than just working around meat for a vegetarian.

It’s depressing how many completely lazy parents are responding here. Learn some new recipes FFS.

It’s not a matter of learning “some” new recipes. DH and I did 2 weeks in Jan without meat or dairy (except for butter). We survived and a couple of the recipes were good and we use them still. But cooking without any eggs or dairy for every meal for 1 person - no way. If your whole family is vegan then fine of course. But supper is not a “home restaurant” experience in my house.

Did it ever occur to you that there is not a requirement to make meals that DO contain eggs and dairy for all but one person? Maybe try vegan meals for the whole family!

Seriously, not trying to convert anyone but there is absolutely no requirement to eat animal products, and certainly not at EVERY meal. So again, learn some new recipes (that the whole family can enjoy) and support your children’s ethics and health.

Vegan meals simply aren't all that enjoyable for non-vegans. A couple of times a week, maybe, but more frequently than that, and it starts feeling very limiting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not accommodate this. It is way too disruptive to family dinners to cook entirely without dairy and eggs. Way more so than just working around meat for a vegetarian.

It’s depressing how many completely lazy parents are responding here. Learn some new recipes FFS.

It’s not about being lazy. I don’t believe one person should force their dietary preferences on the rest of the family just because.

Op, your teen and should be welcome to her own preferences, but she needs to learn how to cook all of her meals. Where I think you can help her is to show her nutritionally, balanced vegan meals because I would also worry about her overall health, and you mentioned eating disorders as well.