Why don’t Americans embrace urban living?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why the obsession with huge houses 3 miles away from everything. Why not access to parks, trails, restaurants, schools, grocery stores, socializing in coffee shops, biking etc?

The American obsession with SFH is unsustainable environmental, financially (impossible to maintain long exburban roads) and mentally


First things first -- people like what they like and it is different from others.

Second many people just do not like urban living -- I don't. Not even sure I like suburban.

Third ---- the way we live is not even close to being unsustainable in any way. I have no idea what you mean by impossible to maintain long exburban roads. That is not even an issue in the US.


How have you never heard about climate change? Or are you just a denier?


np. if we ever want to get serious about carbon emissions, we'll go to all nuclear power, or mostly all nuclear. in the meantime, it's not worth worrying about because individual lifestyle actions don't matter. and urban dwellers use tons of energy, too.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Why the obsession with huge houses 3 miles away from everything. Why not access to parks, trails, restaurants, schools, grocery stores, socializing in coffee shops, biking etc?

The American obsession with SFH is unsustainable environmental, financially (impossible to maintain long exburban roads) and mentally


Keeping up with the Jonses is valued.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:For me, I get that people want different lifestyles, but the way America's suburbs are design is so incredibly horrible for the environment that it's hard for me to understand.


So you think creating super cities like Shanghai, NYC, CDMX, São Paulo, etc. across the globe are preferable to more, smaller cities? No thank you. Those cities don't fair well in a pandemic.


Access to world class hospitals is generally a plus during a pandemic.



Yup, NYC faired so we’ll compared to the rest of the country
Anonymous
For us:

Living in a city was great with no kids.

Living in the suburbs in a large house on a large lot with a large yard is so much better now that we have kids.

Others may think differently. That's the beauty of choice.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why the obsession with huge houses 3 miles away from everything. Why not access to parks, trails, restaurants, schools, grocery stores, socializing in coffee shops, biking etc?

The American obsession with SFH is unsustainable environmental, financially (impossible to maintain long exburban roads) and mentally


Keeping up with the Jonses is valued.


You don't think city people engage in conspicuous consumption?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:For us:

Living in a city was great with no kids.

Living in the suburbs in a large house on a large lot with a large yard is so much better now that we have kids.

Others may think differently. That's the beauty of choice.


You said EXACTLY what I was about to type.

Cities are great for living in an urban setting without kids. But with kids, I can’t imagine living in a city in a crammed condo. I’d rather have some space.

The burbs just provide all of that with ease. That’s my main thing. You can’t have your kids playing in an urban setting next to busy roads, no open space to play, all of the pollution, etc.

If I’m in the burbs in my house, I can be at a park in a few minutes, then go get groceries from the Whole Foods afterwards, all while being back home and eating all within a span of an hour. I can’t do that In the city because I’m bound by the crappy city traffic and city transportation where this would take 2+ hours.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why the obsession with huge houses 3 miles away from everything. Why not access to parks, trails, restaurants, schools, grocery stores, socializing in coffee shops, biking etc?

The American obsession with SFH is unsustainable environmental, financially (impossible to maintain long exburban roads) and mentally


Keeping up with the Jonses is valued.


You don't think city people engage in conspicuous consumption?


Not saying they don't, just mentioning why suburban homes are in more demand than tgey should've been.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:For me, I get that people want different lifestyles, but the way America's suburbs are design is so incredibly horrible for the environment that it's hard for me to understand.


So you think creating super cities like Shanghai, NYC, CDMX, São Paulo, etc. across the globe are preferable to more, smaller cities? No thank you. Those cities don't fair well in a pandemic.


Access to world class hospitals is generally a plus during a pandemic.



Yup, NYC faired so we’ll compared to the rest of the country
Anonymous
Interestingly, people are fittest in areas where car ownership is highest.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I mean, more people live in cities so I'm not sure this is a fair assessment, but I see your point. I have friends who live (what to me is a nightmarish) suburban lifestyle and I think for them a lot of it is not valuing community in the same way I do and taking comfort in material things. I personally don't get it.



It’s odd you think cities have more community feel, I find the opposite

Really? Well, different experiences I guess. I grew up in Fairfax and my parents never talked to any of the neighbors. None of the neighbors seemed to talk to each other either. It was a very "each man for himself" kind of place. I played at a friend's house in the summer until I was 9 and that was it. There were no block parties, clothing swaps, school events, babysitting swaps, dinner parties, pizza parties, neighborhood holiday events like I have now living in NW DC. We are all looking out for each other. We keep each other abreast of things in the hood, at school, and fun things to do. We watch each others' kids and invite people over all the time. I know shop owners and neighbors and the librarians by name. I know many more community people by sight. Hell, I know my local politicians! I help clean up parks and flag issues for the community to deal with. I regularly see friends just walking down the street and decide to have impromptu fun. We had zero of that in Fairfax.


I have 100% of this and live in Fairfax County. Your experience might have more to do with your parents than with living in the burbs.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm confused by the people who want yards. I think I'd rather live right next to or very close by some awesome parks. When I was growing up, we only played in our yard until we were 6 or 7, then it was just playdates with other kids.... which you'd have to drive to in the 'burbs. My city kids walk around the block to play with their friends. Sure you need money, but DC is amazing for having close-in neighborhoods with green space and parks and being pretty safe.


Suburbs have both great parks, great yards, friend to walk to.

Capture the flag, catching lightning bugs while parents visit on the deck.

Have you ever lived in a city? Do you think that doesn't happen here too?


So we get a yard AND friends running to park. How is that not better?


Who wants to mow a lawn? Treat grass?

No thank you.


Suburban dweller here. You really think we all mow our own lawns? In my neighborhood its generally just the retired military guys who mow their own lawns. Otherwise we contribute to the local economy by hiring lawn services.


God forbid kids do chores.


There are plenty of chores to go around but I don’t want to buy/store/fix a lawnmower.
Anonymous
I work for a European company. Most of my European co-workers with kids have one car, both parents work and a lot only have one kid. College is only three years and most kids don’t go away to school.

Growing up my parents had four kids. My mom a SAHM. I recall at one point we owned five cars when my sister in grad school, my brother and I in college. My father also owned a business where he stored files and stuff at home.

Exactly how are six people with five cars living in a 700sf flat with one parking spot. Growing up none of us went away to school. Cars was to drive to schools and jobs. Yes we bought and insured our own cars. Quite a sight to see 5 cars on driveway where three of them worth less than $1,000 dollars
Anonymous
I too had many siblings and as much as I love them, I won't recommend it. It can really mess up upbringing of kids and youth as well as retirement of parents.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I mean, more people live in cities so I'm not sure this is a fair assessment, but I see your point. I have friends who live (what to me is a nightmarish) suburban lifestyle and I think for them a lot of it is not valuing community in the same way I do and taking comfort in material things. I personally don't get it.



It’s odd you think cities have more community feel, I find the opposite

Really? Well, different experiences I guess. I grew up in Fairfax and my parents never talked to any of the neighbors. None of the neighbors seemed to talk to each other either. It was a very "each man for himself" kind of place. I played at a friend's house in the summer until I was 9 and that was it. There were no block parties, clothing swaps, school events, babysitting swaps, dinner parties, pizza parties, neighborhood holiday events like I have now living in NW DC. We are all looking out for each other. We keep each other abreast of things in the hood, at school, and fun things to do. We watch each others' kids and invite people over all the time. I know shop owners and neighbors and the librarians by name. I know many more community people by sight. Hell, I know my local politicians! I help clean up parks and flag issues for the community to deal with. I regularly see friends just walking down the street and decide to have impromptu fun. We had zero of that in Fairfax.


I lived in cities, real cities not suburban NW DC, but the nitty gritty urban areas, through my 20s and into mid 30s. Didn't really know much neighbors even though we lived closely in apartments and rowhouses. Have kids and move to suburbs. Suddenly we know a lot of neighbors. That what kids do for you. There's plenty of lonely singles and even isolated families in cities and plenty or blocks and neighborhoods where people never talk to each other. If anything, I found cities the loneliest places. It's easy to get lost in the crowds.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:For us:

Living in a city was great with no kids.

Living in the suburbs in a large house on a large lot with a large yard is so much better now that we have kids.

Others may think differently. That's the beauty of choice.


I’d amend this to say that the city is still great with babies/toddlers.
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