Ugh, the corporate strip mall swim school complaint thread

Anonymous
I hate these places and hate that they've become the standard option for people like me, who don't belong to a pool (we're on waitlists for several but even those are farther away from where we live than we'd like), have struggled to get into rec swim classes, and have kind of a max on what we can teach our kids ourselves.

Last year we did Big Blue in the late spring and summer, but only for 3 months and I put them in two class a week for 1 of those months. To me that's key -- you have to cluster classes but then give lots of time for practice. To me this is obvious that this is how kids learn to swim.

We may do the same this year but the schools DO NOT want you to do this. They make it really, really hard to get out of future classes with them -- last year they made me jump through a dozen hoops to cancel and we still wound up with 2 classes we couldn't use (because the expired before we could schedule them during the school year when driving to a suburban swim school gets much harder).

I've looked at Goldfish and it's the same deal, though it looks like they offer opportunities for daily classes in the summer at least. But Goldfish even calls their program "perpetual classes" and has a whole thing on their website explaining why they think this is best. It's not! It's best for a business who wants reliable revenue by locking parents into literal YEARS of weekly 30-minute swim classes. So many kids flounder in those classes. And they are expensive, like $35/class. That makes swim far and away the most expensive activity my kids do. I don't mind spending money, but the value is not there.

I really wish we had better pool access and could just hire a 1:1 coach to work with them in the summer but DCPR doesn't seem to allow this and as I mentioned, we have struggled to join a pool. Last year we did fine a coach who was going to work with our kids but we couldn't find a pool where they could reliably do it, so we wound up at Big Blue instead.

Anyway, just a rant. I took swim lessons through the local public pool when I was a kid. The lessons were 3 days a week for 2 weeks, and then you'd either level up or have to repeat. Usually we'd do 2 or 3 sessions a summer, and we were motivated because you had to get to a certain level to be allowed to swim at the pool during open swim without a parent with you the whole time. Some people became great swimmers and some didn't, but everyone became competent swimmers with baseline water safety skills, and it didn't cost anyone's parents thousands (or even hundreds) per year.

Given that swimming is a fundamental skill for safety, it's insane that this is where we are at in the DMV. I HATE it. If I was a swim coach or really into swimming, I'd try to come up with a better model and proliferate it because it should not be this hard to teach kids to swim around here.
Anonymous
Best option is to go to the county or city level till your kids age out and then either a private swim group or swim team.
Anonymous
My older teen has been giving lessons for years. On occasion, someone on the waitlist asks for lessons and it’s easy to do with a guest pass + the lesson. For our pool, it’s $5 or so for the pass so not too much additional $. Maybe that’s an option for you
Anonymous
Sounds like this is due to where you live. Outside the beltway it was not hard to get my kids into Rec, YMCA, and finally a summer pool.
Anonymous
Best way to learn to swim fast is go to a pool as often as possible. Example: Send your kid to a summer camp with a pool that the kids go in every day or preferably twice a day.

They will be swimming proficiently in 2 weeks. They won't want to be left out of things their peers can do. Like swim, use the diving board, etc.
Anonymous
Are you in DC?

Maybe post something on Nextdoor? We have a family at our pool that does swim lessons at their house, in their private pool.

Anonymous
Has same experience in DC and ended up with Arlington County classes - only cost a little more as a non resident.
Anonymous
Swim lessons were available onFort Belvoir at the indoor pool a few years ago for my kids- maybe still now too. Maybe at other bases too around here
Anonymous
One of my sorority sisters from colleges manages one of these. She is as creepy as Mary Kay Letourneau.

I prefer swim lessons at YMCA, Red Cross lessons at public indoor pools, and lessons that are run by swim team programs. I’ve only seen one creep at one of those (a private swim club).
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:One of my sorority sisters from colleges manages one of these. She is as creepy as Mary Kay Letourneau.

I prefer swim lessons at YMCA, Red Cross lessons at public indoor pools, and lessons that are run by swim team programs. I’ve only seen one creep at one of those (a private swim club).


Wow. That is pretty darned creepy.
Anonymous
Are you in DC? You mentioned DCPR which does have classes but you have to be quick when they open to schedule. My kids learned from us then improved at summer camp. My nieces do the classes at the Embassy Suite at Friendship. I think it is private. But there are loads of public pools which cost nothing or a nominal fee is you aren't a resident. Your kids will improve on what you teach them by just going to the pool with you. We never joined a pool or country club. Just did DC public pools.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:One of my sorority sisters from colleges manages one of these. She is as creepy as Mary Kay Letourneau.

I prefer swim lessons at YMCA, Red Cross lessons at public indoor pools, and lessons that are run by swim team programs. I’ve only seen one creep at one of those (a private swim club).


Wow. That is pretty darned creepy.


There are a lot of creepy swim coaches.
Anonymous
My kids are learning at SafeSplash in Columbia Heights, if that's closer to you than driving out to the burbs. We have a pool in our building so I hope we can transition away from weekly classes after our pool opens this summer. Take your kids to the public pool frequently this summer so they can build on their lessons.
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