I got laid off in late December and am miserable

[Anonymous]

I keep getting rejected. Or ghosted. Or networking calls that come to nothing.
Was at the same firm for 10 years. I feel old and useless (I'm 44). It's beginning to wear on me. I feel like I'll never find another job.
I feel even worse because my partner's career is thriving and she's pulling in the lion's share of our income - my severance wears off in two months as does our insurance which my firm provided.
I don't know what to do. I haven't looked for work in a decade. I feel obsolete and like my life has zero structure.
I also am questioning my credentials. I am being rejected for jobs I could clearly do well.
Someone say something. Am considering going on meds to help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I keep getting rejected. Or ghosted. Or networking calls that come to nothing.
Was at the same firm for 10 years. I feel old and useless (I'm 44). It's beginning to wear on me. I feel like I'll never find another job.
I feel even worse because my partner's career is thriving and she's pulling in the lion's share of our income - my severance wears off in two months as does our insurance which my firm provided.
I don't know what to do. I haven't looked for work in a decade. I feel obsolete and like my life has zero structure.
I also am questioning my credentials. I am being rejected for jobs I could clearly do well.
Someone say something. Am considering going on meds to help.

Can you try some contract work in the meantime?

[Anonymous]

Substitute teach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Substitute teach.

?

[Anonymous]

Hang in there. December is a terrible time to get laid off because there really isnt much hiring til Spring. Support your partner if her career is skyrocketing. Sometimes you can ride your partner's coattails in more ways than one and it really is helpful for everyone.

[Anonymous]

I am sorry. When I was laid off it took me nine months to find a job. After numerous failed interviews, including several in the final round, eventually I got two offers in the same week. Keep at it and don’t give up.

One thing I found is that some close contacts who I thought would have helped me did very little at all, while other people that I hadn’t spoken to in years went out of their way to get me interviews. The point is that you need to speak with everyone, not just your current contacts; you never know who is going to be truly helpful.

[Anonymous]

Being laid off is only a problem if you think it is.

1. Take 1-2 days to wallow in self-pity
2. Work on your mindset and belief that it's possible there's a new job out there waiting for you (there are great resources out there such as books, podcasts, coaches, etc if you need additional help)
3. Create a plan/schedule for your job search. In addition to the job search basics (resume, networking, searching for opportunities, applying, interviewing, etc) be sure to include
-time for daily exercise
-additional time to step it up in housework
-get outside the house at least once a day, ideally some networking events mixed in with a coffee shop, errands, etc
-reach out to your network
4. Execute your plan

If this doesn't work there are only two possibilities:
-your plan needs tweaking
-you aren't executing it

Hope this helps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry. When I was laid off it took me nine months to find a job. After numerous failed interviews, including several in the final round, eventually I got two offers in the same week. Keep at it and don’t give up.

One thing I found is that some close contacts who I thought would have helped me did very little at all, while other people that I hadn’t spoken to in years went out of their way to get me interviews. The point is that you need to speak with everyone, not just your current contacts; you never know who is going to be truly helpful.

The above is excellent advice, OP. Would also recommend working out regularly, especially at a gym, for the routine and positive interaction as much as for the health benefits. Talking with an executive coach or therapist can also be helpful. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Attorney?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Being laid off is only a problem if you think it is.

1. Take 1-2 days to wallow in self-pity
2. Work on your mindset and belief that it's possible there's a new job out there waiting for you (there are great resources out there such as books, podcasts, coaches, etc if you need additional help)
3. Create a plan/schedule for your job search. In addition to the job search basics (resume, networking, searching for opportunities, applying, interviewing, etc) be sure to include
-time for daily exercise
-additional time to step it up in housework
-get outside the house at least once a day, ideally some networking events mixed in with a coffee shop, errands, etc
-reach out to your network
4. Execute your plan

If this doesn't work there are only two possibilities:
-your plan needs tweaking
-you aren't executing it

Hope this helps.

Agree with all but the last paragraph.

If you are struggling mentally, definitely see a psychiatrist. Meds can help.

And consider doing contract work or consulting on your own. It can fill the resume gap and keep skills fresh. Try volunteering as well. Hang in there!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry. When I was laid off it took me nine months to find a job. After numerous failed interviews, including several in the final round, eventually I got two offers in the same week. Keep at it and don’t give up.

One thing I found is that some close contacts who I thought would have helped me did very little at all, while other people that I hadn’t spoken to in years went out of their way to get me interviews. The point is that you need to speak with everyone, not just your current contacts; you never know who is going to be truly helpful.

Same story with DH, but 12 months. VP. Keep interviewing, OP! You will find a job.

[Anonymous]

Great advice from PPs. Stay positive and keep reaching out to former collegues as far back as your work history goes. Preface it as seeing how they are doing, what they are up to and you were thinking about the time at that former employer and wondering how everyone is doing plus where they are now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry. When I was laid off it took me nine months to find a job. After numerous failed interviews, including several in the final round, eventually I got two offers in the same week. Keep at it and don’t give up.

One thing I found is that some close contacts who I thought would have helped me did very little at all, while other people that I hadn’t spoken to in years went out of their way to get me interviews. The point is that you need to speak with everyone, not just your current contacts; you never know who is going to be truly helpful.

Your outer network is proven to be more helpful than close contacts.

Get on meds if you need them and work on reaching out to those you don't know as well. They will likely be the most helpful. I bet you can find a new role through relationships and a referral from one of those people to a hiring manager.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Being laid off is only a problem if you think it is.

1. Take 1-2 days to wallow in self-pity
2. Work on your mindset and belief that it's possible there's a new job out there waiting for you (there are great resources out there such as books, podcasts, coaches, etc if you need additional help)
3. Create a plan/schedule for your job search. In addition to the job search basics (resume, networking, searching for opportunities, applying, interviewing, etc) be sure to include
-time for daily exercise
-additional time to step it up in housework
-get outside the house at least once a day, ideally some networking events mixed in with a coffee shop, errands, etc
-reach out to your network
4. Execute your plan

If this doesn't work there are only two possibilities:
-your plan needs tweaking
-you aren't executing it

Hope this helps.

Mostly useless advice. Rise and Grind is solution.

My job search in Covid was as follow crack open computer 630 am and scour websites for jobs and apply I usually do 5-10 a day. Even apply if no jobs posted if dream company.
Use LinkedIn premium try to connect 10-20 new people a day, on LinkedIn reach out to 10-20 people a day custom message, set up on-going video meetings with people in same boat or friends, or even strangers to discuss progress. Post original content LinkedIn at least 1-2 times a week.

Any job applied to reach out to people who work there directly.

On my search in Covid I applied directly 500-600 jobs, messaged with custom message on LinkedIn including resume to 2,000 -3,000 people, had 30-50 video meetings, around 150 interviews, and 200 posts.

why so many? I tell you why? A CFO in San Fran and me were chatting he put me in fir a big job I did not get. I was number two out of a few hundred. A head of audit in Luxembourg of all places referred me to a Chief Risk Officer in Belgium who threw me to a CEO in the UK who tossed me to his board member in NY. They hired me for a $5,000 a week renote engagement for six months just off this Daisy chain of connections none I ever worked with or knew in real life. During that six month gig I kept applying and a guy in the UK liked what he saw as he knew the UK and Belgium company I was doing work at and hired me full time.It’s called grinding. Going to gym, going for walk, going for therapy is for Nancy boys.

I would also speak at or attend conferences, Covid is over.

You have a great advantage being unemployed. Time so use it.

And make up multiple resumes to apply multiple types of job and use Chat Gpt to do cover letters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Substitute teach.

?

Be a substitute teacher at a middle or high school.