Youth Referee

Anonymous
My almost 18 year old daughter is looking into getting certified to become a Referee. However she's hesitant lately because of how the parents treat the refs at games. For those of you that have teenage referees, is it worth it? Do they constantly get screamed at or heckled? Or are parents more respectful of younger refs?
Anonymous
My daughter (14) started as a referee last year. She's only had positive experiences but then again, she's only worked at rec level games for younger kids. She's gotten compliments from the coaches, and the kids sometimes call her Miss Larla. It's really cute and she's earned some decent money!

I can also tell you that based on the email distros I joined when she started, there is a TON of work out there and your daughter can make $$$$ as a ref. Especially if she gains confidence to ref the big league travel games. Of course, there may also be more toxic parents/coaches but if she can get past it she will earn a lot!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My almost 18 year old daughter is looking into getting certified to become a Referee. However she's hesitant lately because of how the parents treat the refs at games. For those of you that have teenage referees, is it worth it? Do they constantly get screamed at or heckled? Or are parents more respectful of younger refs?


No even the little kids’ games are bad. My DD has stopped doing games. Parents and coaches are crazy.
Anonymous
Just be an AR and be coaches side
Anonymous
My DS started last spring after he turned 14 and has enjoyed it for the most part -- definitely start with younger rec kids! He's done some tournaments now as AR and he's enjoyed it. Still stays with kids a couple years younger than he is though. He's looking forward to getting back into it this spring. And for a 14 year old, he made about $1k in 2023. Not too bad!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My almost 18 year old daughter is looking into getting certified to become a Referee. However she's hesitant lately because of how the parents treat the refs at games. For those of you that have teenage referees, is it worth it? Do they constantly get screamed at or heckled? Or are parents more respectful of younger refs?


We've been doing girls travel for a few years now. My experience with refs has been that the only ones that get heckled/yelled at by parents are older male refs who stand in one place and barely pay attention to the game. They miss a ton of calls and let play get extremely rough.

We usually get one of those a season. The rest people generally have no problem with and no one really says much. You'll get the occasional parent who will try to ref from the sideline but they're more annoying than anything else.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My almost 18 year old daughter is looking into getting certified to become a Referee. However she's hesitant lately because of how the parents treat the refs at games. For those of you that have teenage referees, is it worth it? Do they constantly get screamed at or heckled? Or are parents more respectful of younger refs?


My daughters started when they were 15 with the younger kids to get a feel for the games. They quickly had lists of which teams / coaches they were willing to ref for again. That being said, tell your daughter to make the calls as she sees them. If people get upset, screw them. I’ve seen some great teenage refs put loudmouths in their place over the years
Anonymous
My now 11yo plays soccer for OBGC and I’ve never seen anyone disrespect the refs.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My almost 18 year old daughter is looking into getting certified to become a Referee. However she's hesitant lately because of how the parents treat the refs at games. For those of you that have teenage referees, is it worth it? Do they constantly get screamed at or heckled? Or are parents more respectful of younger refs?


My daughters started when they were 15 with the younger kids to get a feel for the games. They quickly had lists of which teams / coaches they were willing to ref for again. That being said, tell your daughter to make the calls as she sees them. If people get upset, screw them. I’ve seen some great teenage refs put loudmouths in their place over the years


That's awesome! Glad to hear she was comfortable to stand up to the heckling and obnoxious parents.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My almost 18 year old daughter is looking into getting certified to become a Referee. However she's hesitant lately because of how the parents treat the refs at games. For those of you that have teenage referees, is it worth it? Do they constantly get screamed at or heckled? Or are parents more respectful of younger refs?


My daughters started when they were 15 with the younger kids to get a feel for the games. They quickly had lists of which teams / coaches they were willing to ref for again. That being said, tell your daughter to make the calls as she sees them. If people get upset, screw them. I’ve seen some great teenage refs put loudmouths in their place over the years


One of my kids had a game reffed by a kid who could not have been older than 14, and he did not hesitate to call the shots. It was really impressive how in command of the game he was!

Another of my kids is going to start ref training this year.
Anonymous
Do youth or be a line referee with a middle ref to deal with abuse
Anonymous
At 18 years old, she should be fine. This might be good for her to thicken her skin as she heads out on her own. I started reffing about 4 years ago when my kid was 12 and he started doing the side at age 12 for the local rec league. Our local rec league provides side referees for U9s and older. So doing the side at U9 is a GREAT way to start. Then when you feel comfortable you can center the U9 game and have more experienced friends/referees be side refs to guide you. Many leagues only use one center referee for U12 and lower. I've now refereed over 320 games (as either a side referee (and AR) or as the center referee) and I will never center a game without ARs. It's not worth it TO ME. Its alot to ask to watch for the ball to go out of bounds on the side and end to end, plus watching for offside at both ends. I understand that the fields are smaller at the younger ages but I would MUCH rather referee a U13 full field game with ARs than solo ref a U9 game. But yet, the assignors and leagues expect new referees to learn by doing the youngest ages but as a solo referee. It makes no sense. With that said...I've been heckled a handful of times. I've wanted to quit probably 20 times. More often than not I ask myself...why the hell am I doing this to myself. But each week, I enjoy looking for games and refereeing. I get my steps in, nice to be outside, helping the game, helping the players, etc. I currently referee as high as ECNL and as low as local rec. My advice is be on time, look professional, project confidence, know the laws of the game and the league rules, bit fit and cover ground....if you do these things, you'll be alright. Most parents forgive a bad call here and there, but even I lay into refs who don't cover the field and don't know the laws. Player safety is paramount.
Anonymous
I have a 16 and a 14 year old that referee. They make nice money. The older one will center any game that they allow him to center because centers get paid more than ARs. He's all about the money. He's probably done 40 centers so far at various ages and levels from ECNL-R to Rec. He's one of those kids that thinks he's always right, always!, so if/when he gets yelled at, it doesn't bother him because he's always right and they don't know what they are talking about. : ) The 14 year old wants zero parts of centering because he doesn't want to get yelled at. He just AR's rec games. I think it's very much worth it in general.
Anonymous
We had a game that was refereed by a 15 or 16 yo. He did go to both sides and tell the parents that he is young and wont be tolerating any sideline shenanigans. the only comments you heard from the parents was "great call ref".

Anonymous
As a ref I can’t wait to get screamed at this spring!
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