Potty training methods

[Anonymous]

What to Expect Logo
Sign Out
A
Community > Birth Month
September 2020 Babiesdiscussion joined
September 2020 Babies
10.3K Discussions
163K Members

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. Learn more about our guidelines
Just so you know, What to Expect may make commissions on shopping links on this page.

Potty training methods
A
Amy71452
Jan 28, 2024 at 3:08 PM
Hi all, frustrated mom here, we've been failing to train DD for the past 3-4 months. We've tried the 3 day method, no underwear, using the potty and the toilet, rewarding, making her clean up, demonstrating to her, reading books, you name it we've tried it. And zero success. I'm at a loss of what else to try. Does someone have an idea that works, we're back in daycare and basically out of work leave for a while and they insist on pull ups at least until she initiates. We need to sort this next week but I don't know how to get it to work for her. She's willing to try and engages, but she's not able to initiate herself and any success has been because we've kept her sat there regularly for longer periods

[Anonymous]

OP here apologies, I tried to cross post as I'm not getting any response from another forum, so sorry for the awful formatting

[Anonymous]

How old? Tbh there are lots of ways that work and what works best really depends on each parent/kid combo. My approach is to take the old fashioned approach: start putting kid on the potty at wake up/before sleep starting around 15-18 months, switch to undies around 2 and deal with the accidents as needed and use bribery for stubborn refusal points. Kids are in daycare full time so at first I aim for trained-for-a-few-hours (mornings and evenings), then I start working up to longer periods in undies on weekends. So far it’s worked for my two kids but I get that not everyone enjoys this approach. The oh crap intensive naked all the time approach really doesn’t work for me — 100% focus attention on the potty training child is way too much pressure for both of us and impractical for managing to get normal life chores done — but I know it has worked for other people on this board so if that’s what feels right to you, hopefully they can chime in with pointers.

[Anonymous]

How old? Is there a reason she needs to train now? It sounds like pull up

It sounds like you haven't stuck with anything. All that changing methods is going to disrupt any progress.

[Anonymous]

OP here, she turned 3 in September, we've been trying since she turned 3

[Anonymous]

Does she have accidents if you take her to the potty regularly (eg every hours)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, she turned 3 in September, we've been trying since she turned 3

Is daycare asking her to leave, or refusing to let her move up, or are they fine with her coming if she's in a pull up?

[Anonymous]

OP here, daycare are fine with a pull up, this isn't limiting her in that sense.

We do take her every hour, but sometimes she'll sit for 20 mins and do nothing then have an accident 10 minutes later

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, daycare are fine with a pull up, this isn't limiting her in that sense.

We do take her every hour, but sometimes she'll sit for 20 mins and do nothing then have an accident 10 minutes later

Ah gotcha. I personally found bribery (specifically mini marshmallows) very effective for this stage. Keep the potty timer, incentivize using the potty but only make the kid sit for a couple minutes each time. I realize bribery (especially bribery with food) isn’t fashionable as a parenting technique but it sure worked for me. 🙃

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, daycare are fine with a pull up, this isn't limiting her in that sense.

We do take her every hour, but sometimes she'll sit for 20 mins and do nothing then have an accident 10 minutes later

Ah gotcha. I personally found bribery (specifically mini marshmallows) very effective for this stage. Keep the potty timer, incentivize using the potty but only make the kid sit for a couple minutes each time. I realize bribery (especially bribery with food) isn’t fashionable as a parenting technique but it sure worked for me. 🙃

OP here thank you, this has been a main part of our hope for success, she has been very rewarding driven, we've been giving sweets for every time she's gone successfully. We've got bigger sweets if she initiates although haven't been able to give these yet. She's chosen to sit on the toilet but hasn't gone.

We've also got a big prize for when she's potty trained so the bribery incentive is there.

[Anonymous]

OP I have 4 kids. I was like you with my oldest and talked to the amazing director of our preschool who has seen it all (and raised multiple kids and grandkids). She said when the kid is ready, the kid is ready and it’s a non event. She gets so frustrated when people don’t realize it’s a physical thing. Just wait until your child really wants to and it will be easy. We let the kids decide and once they were consistently going on the potty then it was just a switch to underwear they picked out and that was that. One child was 4, two were 3.5 and the youngest was 2. If you are having this many issues, just table it and revisit.
We know two people who pushed it and both kids ended up w/ severe constipation/colon issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, daycare are fine with a pull up, this isn't limiting her in that sense.

We do take her every hour, but sometimes she'll sit for 20 mins and do nothing then have an accident 10 minutes later

I'd probably take her every half hour, but only for a few minutes at a time. I think the pp's idea of a mini marsmallow incentive is a good one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, daycare are fine with a pull up, this isn't limiting her in that sense.

We do take her every hour, but sometimes she'll sit for 20 mins and do nothing then have an accident 10 minutes later

I'd probably take her every half hour, but only for a few minutes at a time. I think the pp's idea of a mini marsmallow incentive is a good one.

Op here Thank you we were advised against such frequency but will give it a try, as we've not had a proper try like this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I have 4 kids. I was like you with my oldest and talked to the amazing director of our preschool who has seen it all (and raised multiple kids and grandkids). She said when the kid is ready, the kid is ready and it’s a non event. She gets so frustrated when people don’t realize it’s a physical thing. Just wait until your child really wants to and it will be easy. We let the kids decide and once they were consistently going on the potty then it was just a switch to underwear they picked out and that was that. One child was 4, two were 3.5 and the youngest was 2. If you are having this many issues, just table it and revisit.
We know two people who pushed it and both kids ended up w/ severe constipation/colon issue.

OP here, thank you this is my eldest, I have a just turned 1 year old, so not been through this yet. I've been told by everybody she should have trained months ago, and there's not many jn her daycare not trained, her friends are training so she must be physically old enough?

[Anonymous]

It really helps if the kid wants to do it.