Do you step in when another kid is feeling sad or upset?

[Anonymous]

My daughter is 6. I sometimes witness kids being mean to another kid or a child that I don’t know well is visibly upset.

Do you just MYOB or try to help?

At our last Girl Scouts meeting, there was a girl who was visibly upset and crying. Some of the girls in our troop are not nice and I am sure they said or did something to her. I asked her if she was ok and she just looked sad and said nothing. Other times I see kids actively excluding another child. I correct my child immediately but my child is not the instigator.

[Anonymous]

If it’s an organized activity, the leader should intervene.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it’s an organized activity, the leader should intervene.

And OP, way to assume.

[Anonymous]

Of course adults should step in to mitigate effects of bullying! Be kind to the child being bullied, and speak to the bullies about their behavior.

Part of me is mind boggled by this question, but the bigger part of me understands that far too many adults - including those in tbr education system - just don’t want to be bothered with this kind of character building.

[Anonymous]

Depends. If their parent is there, I look to them to intervene. In the case you described, the parent might not have been there. It’s fine to ask, “Hey Larla, what’s going on?” If she doesn’t answer, you can just say something like ,”Okay. Let me or Ms Jones know if we can help. Why don’t you join us over here.”

If I’m right there and witness some mean behavior, I call it out. But then again, I’m a teacher and have no issue doing that. 😬 “I heard that, and it wasn’t kind. Try again in a kind way.” Or something like that. And then when she rephrases, respond with a simple, “Excellent.” Move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends. If their parent is there, I look to them to intervene. In the case you described, the parent might not have been there. It’s fine to ask, “Hey Larla, what’s going on?” If she doesn’t answer, you can just say something like ,”Okay. Let me or Ms Jones know if we can help. Why don’t you join us over here.”

If I’m right there and witness some mean behavior, I call it out. But then again, I’m a teacher and have no issue doing that. 😬 “I heard that, and it wasn’t kind. Try again in a kind way.” Or something like that. And then when she rephrases, respond with a simple, “Excellent.” Move on.

Op here. I did ask her if she was ok and to join. I checked on her twice but she was crying in the corner. Not sure if I should have done more.

[Anonymous]

Op again. I didn’t mention to the mom. I don’t really know her.

[Anonymous]

If the parent is there, I hang back and let them deal. If they're not there, I help the way I'd want someone to help my kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends. If their parent is there, I look to them to intervene. In the case you described, the parent might not have been there. It’s fine to ask, “Hey Larla, what’s going on?” If she doesn’t answer, you can just say something like ,”Okay. Let me or Ms Jones know if we can help. Why don’t you join us over here.”

If I’m right there and witness some mean behavior, I call it out. But then again, I’m a teacher and have no issue doing that. 😬 “I heard that, and it wasn’t kind. Try again in a kind way.” Or something like that. And then when she rephrases, respond with a simple, “Excellent.” Move on.

Op here. I did ask her if she was ok and to join. I checked on her twice but she was crying in the corner. Not sure if I should have done more.

That was kind of you. I might have sat in the corner with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the parent is there, I hang back and let them deal. If they're not there, I help the way I'd want someone to help my kid.

+1

[Anonymous]

If I see a kid being aggressive or unkind, I will intervene and let them know that behavior isn't okay with me.

I would not intervene if I just saw a kid being sad. Kids get sad for all kinds of reasons. Unless I was worried for their welfare, I would assume they can discuss with their parent/teacher/troop leader/guardian when appropriate.

My kid is on the emotional/sensitive side and would not want a strange adult asking about her emotions in that setting. She'd feel embarrassed anyone noticed and view it as negative attention. Not something we've told her, she's just a sensitive kid.

[Anonymous]

If parent is there, alert them and back away. If not, go sit and talk. Don’t press for info but keep the kid company. Don’t interfere with kid social dynamics. But make the kid not feel alone. If kid appears to not want you there, back away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course adults should step in to mitigate effects of bullying! Be kind to the child being bullied, and speak to the bullies about their behavior.

Part of me is mind boggled by this question, but the bigger part of me understands that far too many adults - including those in tbr education system - just don’t want to be bothered with this kind of character building.

Thank you.

100 to step in and help especially at this age. How heartless to do anything different

This is what it means to be part of a community. What would you want someone to do if it was your kid crying in the corner.

I have done this also with a 6 year old girl (she wasn't paired with her friend of choice on the walk back from a field trip. I sat there with her and tried to calm her down and tell her she could play with her now and the teachers just choose. I know the mom, texted her. She thanked me and told me a bit about her kid and her kids feelings. This made it better when I left and the kid was sad but not sobbing anymore.

[Anonymous]

Its fine to ask if she's ok. But don't go around making assumptions about the other kids. Unless you left something out, you saw no interaction with other kids and are just assuming kids were being mean.

[Anonymous]

I am a stepper in person.