For CIO, what do you do about wakeups after 5 am?

[Anonymous]

We're in the middle of sleep training our 4.5 month old using the CIO method (all-out, not the Ferber variation). Things are going well, but I'm curious what folks do for the wakeups that happen after 5 am. We still do one feeding between 3-4 am just in case DC is crying between that time period truly out of hunger (though pediatrician thinks he likely doesn't need it) and plan to gradually wean DC off of that feeding by decreasing the size of the bottles. So, the wakeups that happen after 5 are likely not out of hunger given the feeding between 3-4 am -- or am I wrong? Do you let baby CIO in the early morning? For us, this sometimes results in a 6 am CIO session that is never really resolved by the time it's time to get up for the morning.

[Anonymous]

Yup, we did CIO until our desired morning wakeup time. BUT make sure you have amazing black out curtains. You shouldn't be able to see a hand in front of your face in there, even in the morning light.

[Anonymous]

PP here to add - instead of a 4-5 feeding, I would do a dreamfeed at 11pm or so. That way you can sleep from 11-6 or 7. Bliss.

[Anonymous]

Maybe that’s your baby’s natural wake time?

[Anonymous]

We just CIO until our natural wake time. All 3 kids adapted pretty quickly. Babies waking before 7am would wake up the whole household, including siblings, so it wasn't a good time.

[Anonymous]

I did CIO at 4.5 months too. She slept from 8pm-4am, had a bottle them back to sleep until 7am ish. About a month later she dropped that 4am feeding by herself.
What time is she going to sleep in the evening?
I would maybe push the 3-4am feeding to 4am in the hooe she goes back to sleep until 6-7am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here to add - instead of a 4-5 feeding, I would do a dreamfeed at 11pm or so. That way you can sleep from 11-6 or 7. Bliss.

I agree. I think the idea of CIO is to teach them that you aren't coming. Sometimes coming and sometimes not, for a baby who can't tell time, is super confusing. No wonder they are taking some time to settle when they wake up at 5:30 if the last time they woke up and cried it worked! Doing a dreamfeed, so the kid learns that they only get fed when you're the one waking them up seems much less confusing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe that’s your baby’s natural wake time?

PP here. Dear lord, I hope not! I should clarify that if it's after 6:30, we're ok with getting up (begrudgingly). My concern is more with the waking that happens between 5-6:30 am. Too early for my constitution.

Thanks everyone for the suggestions. We're going to try a dream feed....

[Anonymous]

We personally did not do CIO at that time, because the book we used said at 5 am they don't have the sleep pressure so truly will just cry the whole time which wasn't comfortable for us personally. But we didn't get baby out of bed before 6 am so would usually do checks (but we were doing checks anyway) and some comfort at that time, but would just reiterate it is still nighttime, would keep curtains closed, quiet, etc, would try a feed if needed. Our book said once they've been in bed 11 hours that is a fair amount of time in bed basically, as many don't sleep beyond that so for us that was 6 am.

It gets better op! 4.5 months is still very little, a feed at night is normal for many and like another pp said both my kids dropped it on their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We personally did not do CIO at that time, because the book we used said at 5 am they don't have the sleep pressure so truly will just cry the whole time which wasn't comfortable for us personally. But we didn't get baby out of bed before 6 am so would usually do checks (but we were doing checks anyway) and some comfort at that time, but would just reiterate it is still nighttime, would keep curtains closed, quiet, etc, would try a feed if needed. Our book said once they've been in bed 11 hours that is a fair amount of time in bed basically, as many don't sleep beyond that so for us that was 6 am.

It gets better op! 4.5 months is still very little, a feed at night is normal for many and like another pp said both my kids dropped it on their own.

Oh and I will add, the sleep consultant we used with our second said that you don't have to be as worried as some say about "confusing" baby by having some responsiveness. Both my kids sleep trained well while still having feeds.

[Anonymous]

I know, I know, this isn’t the thread for me.

But in case any prospective parents are reading this and thinking this sounds so normal and benign, please know there are other ways. Many of your peers and trusted professionals would never do this but won’t tell you for fear of seeing judgmental. You do NOT have to put your infants’ nervous systems through this type of turmoil.

[Anonymous]

Would you consider doing a feeding around 5 am? My youngest is 6 months and due to my older children’s morning schedule I usually try to nurse around 5 am so I can get the older two ready in the morning without interruption.

[Anonymous]

5am counts as the morning per Ferber. At that age, I wouldn't do CIO at 5am. They make up for the early wakeup with multiple naps a day. Ot you can try adjusting the evening or feeding a schedule, but not CIO.

For a toddler, sure, they shouldn't be waking up at 5am.

[Anonymous]

Anything after 5am was considered up for the day. Full on up - lights on - loud noises etc. That's what the Ferber book recommended. For us it was only a few mornings of these early wake-up and then baby was getting up closer to 7am which was our desired wake-up time. I did try to delay the morning feed to closer to 7am so baby didn't get used to eating at that time. It worked out within a week and we were at a pretty good schedule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know, I know, this isn’t the thread for me.

But in case any prospective parents are reading this and thinking this sounds so normal and benign, please know there are other ways. Many of your peers and trusted professionals would never do this but won’t tell you for fear of seeing judgmental. You do NOT have to put your infants’ nervous systems through this type of turmoil.

I agree. I don't even know why some people have kids if this is how they want to treat them.